Why do white/european guys not like me?

[Anonymous]

Now before I hear people saying stuff like "why do you want a white guy so much you need to go for other guys as well" etc. let me say this. My family has immigrated from the middle east into a scandinavian country and the white ratio is obviously a LOT higher than in let's say america. So white guys not being interested in me makes it a lot more difficult getting a boyfriend than it would be in as I said usa. Just putting that out there. I've always prefered scandinavian guys in specific though because they are very relaxed and caring and not sexist and all that good stuff. And I also just find them very physicaly attractive. The problem is that they dont feel the same. I'm an 18 year old girl. I have dark brown eyes black hair (but I dye it brown usually) and I have quite dark skin compared to nordic women. So I definitely dont look scandinavian even though I feel like I am on the inside I mean I was born here. My female friends tell me that Im really pretty and I do get a lot of attention from other immigrant guys. Just not from the native guys so to speak. People tell me that its because they are shy but that can't be the only reason. Yes scandinavian guys are a lot more shy and maybe less confident compared to other guys but still. What also confuses me is that middle eastern men here seem to have no problem getting a scandinavian girlfriend but still many middle eastern girls like me struggle :(. My family is muslim but very open minded and not super religious they have said that they would let me marry any guy as long as he treats me well and loves me.

Updates

+1 y

I just wanna add that I dont dress as a muslim girl would as well Im not very muslim I look like any other girl dressing wise.

[Hannah591]

Honestly, I don't think a lot of white guys are attracted to middle eastern women in general and they are often very religious or they have a strict family. Muslims and Islam don't have a good image right now and more people are becoming atheist, so anyone who looks like they're involved with Islam, will most likely not be appealing. Looking up about it, Scandinavia seems to be one of the most atheist countries in the world so religion could be a huge part of it.

Either way, there will always be white guys who find middle eastern women attractive and it's possible a white man already thinks you're attractive so don't concern yourself with it that much.

[Asker]

Im not ver religious. I mean Im about as muslim as someone who says they are christian but barely ever goes to church. I just wish some day a guy would like me I would treat him like a prince :(

[Hannah591]

They're basing it on your looks because most middle eastern people are, that's why. Try chatting one up, showing him you're not religious and that you're interested and maybe you'll get more luck.

[Anonymous]

honestly im betting its because they think due to religion or your families culture you won't be interested in a non muslim or non middle eastern guy. there's quite a lot in my country that really like middle eastern girls because of how exotic and unique they look but dont bother to pursue them because they think its a guaranteed rejection

[Asker]

I dont know how I can let them know :(. I can't just wear a shirt that says "I dont just date muslim men" xD

[Opinion Owner]

XD thatd be pretty funny though :P i think if you initiated some flirting and smiled at guys when looking at them i think theyd take the hint pretty quickly

[Hyped_up_on_coffee]

its not that they don't find you attractive but they have a perception girls like you need to marry someone of their own religion

[Asker]

I dont know who told them that O:

[cavmanier]

The other girls may not be getting as much attention as you think. Also taking some initiate may help. From my experience I've found girls will often do that, especially if I get to know them in a social setting.

Yes some may like white women more but I think it depends.

If you're measuring their confidence based on frequency of approaching women, that seems like an inaccurate way.

[Asker]

Im a very shy girl :(

[cavmanier]

it can help your chances.

[kheserthorpe]

I actually know a Swedish guy with a middle eastern wife.

I think some aren't interested but some would be. But many would be - extra - shy because they might think you're not open to dating non Muslim guys.

[Asker]

oh I understand... But as I said there would be no way for them to know I was muslim. Some middle eastern are christian too.

[kheserthorpe]

True. It's a poor assumption. But they are likely very unsure that you'd date as per Swedish norms.

[Anonymous]

I'm from scandinavia. Middle eastern girls look ok to me. I prefer east Asians and white but after that middle eastern girls and latinas. But islam really is a problem for me. I wouldn't want my future kids to be influenced by it in even a minor way. And I would also not be able to live with a muslim woman as some core values of islam are against mine. Like sexism, homophobia etc. Why dont you get together with some muslim guy. Dont you think we made it clear that we dont have any interest in you?

[Slavanna]

The girl was born and raised in Europe , if I infer correctly. I don't think a normalised European gal would consider dating a Muslim guy, knowing the community from the inside and all that, unless he really shone in her eyes.

[Opinion Owner]

European girls love muslim guys and european guys hate muslim girls.

[anastasis]

They probably think you're an Islamic terrorist. As a Causasian male, I know I sure think middle eastern women are terrorist jihad breeders. I wouldn't date a middle eastern lady unless she was a Chaldean Christian. I think Persian women are beautiful, but wow are they ever screwed up. I don't want to have a son who's going to go fight for ISIS. So yeah, it's the whole Muslim thing. It's ruined the middle east. That's why the middle east sucks.

[Asker]

Most muslims that move to Europe do it because they dont agree with the way extreme muslims and terrorists live. :( and then when we come here we get treated like them... :(

[HonestWhiteGuy]

That's interesting you say they are less confident, wonder if thats because of feminism or what. If you notice in Muslim societies the men still generally have control over the women, women have less freedoms but maybe it also might make the guys more confident.

[Tdieseler]

can't ask a question like that unless you have met ALL white/european guys. Including the ones in Europe and other countries too.

[Asker]

Yes Im sorry it just be a very long title then xD

[Tdieseler]

I also find it interesting you say you are 18 but are in a different range.. im sure you are just rounding up.. that is very natural lol.. i just wanted to say something about it.
Go on meeting people... and remember not every person or race is going to like you. Its like me asking why no Asian girls like me, funny thing is I have a bunch of Asian friends too lol. I just think to myself "Well if she doesn't like me, Im sure her Puerto-Rican friend will" and i move on. you should do the same.

[Asker]

haha yes Im 17 now but I will be 18 soon. And as I said. If no scandinavian guys like me then it means I only get to pick from 15% of my countries population. So it is actually a huge problem :,(

[Tdieseler]

how do you know ALL Scandinavians don't like you? was there some kind of memo that went out? or is it a law or something?

[Asker]

I have never been asked out or had a scandinavian guy show interest in me. And I also almost never see them with middle eastern girlfriends on the street.

[Tdieseler]

maybe because there are a dime a dozen.. people tend not to want stuff that is everywhere, they want the one no one of few others have. thats just an analogy. Now back to you, how about YOU show interest in one of them? have you thought about that?

[Asker]

I would be able to show interest in a middle eastern guy because I have had them show interest in me before so I know there's a chance. But I can't do it with scandinavian guys because they have never shown interest ever.

[Tdieseler]

i meant make the first move...

[Asker]

you can't make a move on someone that doesn't show any interest in you xD: Its like walking through a locked door.

[Tdieseler]

umm.. guys do it all the time.. its called a cold approach... if you can't do it, then I guess now you can imagine why THEY aren't doing it.

[NateInAk]

I can't explain it. You sound like you could be beautiful (I mean I only know what you told us) so I can't understand it. Maybe most guys are really shy there.

[SomethingWicked]

It's due to preconceived concepts due to your origins. They probably think you're not interested in them, or that you're not allowed to be with them.

[scottisthealphamale]

i like any girl, especcially a approachable one. im white as they come by the way (galic welsh and italian)

[StickStickity13]

Guys tend to go after girls they're comfortable with. Since girls of their ethnicity are what they grew up with it makes them more comfortable. You basically need to make them feel comfortable.

[Anonymous]

So you like nordic guys then? what ethnicity are you?
you have succeeded dating one now?

[Opinion Owner]

So girls like scandinavian guys?

[Opinion Owner]

How is everything?

[Error_204]

Xenophobia. Done.