I dated smooth talking, "cool" guys throughout college, and I always ended up getting hurt in the end. Last night, I finally went on a date with an incredibly sweet guy. I've never seen someone try so hard before and he treated me like gold. He's cute, very smart, and generous. The problem is that I'm completely turned off by his lack of self-confidence. He kept putting himself down and asking for reassurance, and was just overall awkward. I know this is the kind of guy I should be dating if I want a different result, but I can't seem to get past his low self-esteem. Is there a way to make yourself like someone you know is better for you? Is it even the right thing to do?
Most Helpful Girl
You need TIME to get used to someone and be confident around them. Girls I know will talk to a guy for one night and sleep with him right away and then the guy moves on. I don't know if you slept with other guys easily, but with a nice guy you have to gradually work up to it. Get to know him. He will open up, and once you guys are actually close and have an emotional connection then he will feel like he can be goofy and fun and confident around you and he can be confident in thinking that you won't judge him for being a goof and that you will do the same.
Actually, act like you know him, be goofy, be fun. It rubs off in people. Im really shy, and its way easier to open up and be confident when you're around people who are confident and act as if they've know you for years. They make that feel true :)
But if you don't think you're ready to start looking for that deeper connection in people don't feel like you have to. You can be young and have fun too :)2