My boyfriend called me insecure?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend said I'm insecure and very needy and clingy. How do I fix this situation?

[Miezko]

Well, for starters, your boyfriend shouldn't speak to you like that. It's not a healthy form of communication. But of you still want to address those three issues, let's take them one at a time.

So first insecurity. What exactly is it that you are insecure about? You have to identify the problem first, than you can try to improve in those areas. For example if it's body image you can get a gym membership, see a personal trainer, and consult a nutritionist. Also, you can try personal affirmations. For instance, every day when you wake up, take a second to tell yourself how smart, beautiful, and amazing you are.

Second, being needy, learn to do things on your own. Try your best to get the job done, so to speak, before asking for help. When you do need help, instead of just letting someone else do it for you, have them show you how to do it so you can do it yourself next time.

Third, spend time doing things you like, hang out with your friends. Have a girl's night out once or twice a week. And let him have his space too.

Is always good to work on yourself, to try and become the best version of you that you can be. But it's never healthy to let people put you down. You're an amazing person, and the people you give the privilege of knowing you too should respect you as one.

[BullyDawg]

Ah the woman who feels a connection so deep she wants to love and be with the person of her affection... oh to have that problem... which isn't a problem accept... for the one who does not understand... Separate and no I a! Not saying dump him but, embrace some of your personal hobbies and let him miss it... then remember every rose needs room to grow so that you may see the blossoms beauty... hugz n smiles...🍀🐶🍀

[BullyDawg]

Smiles and hugz the best you and if he doesn't see you for your gifts and appreciate them it will truly be his loss..🍀🐶🍀

[Darkfairie17]

Try your best to have interests outside of the relationship. Try to distract yourself from always having to be in contact with him. I'm not sure of your full situation. But oftentimes the complaint of clinginess comes from constantly having to talk to someone and be in the know about everything going on with them.

Take a class, start reading a book, catch up with friends, do something that can pre-occupy yourself with so that you aren't constantly talking to your partner. Not sure if you are, but it might help make them feel like you are not so clingy.

Some people like clingy, some people like knowing what their partner is doing all the time. I'm talking to a guy right now who is just like me, and loves to talk all day and it's going great so far. He's very nice and never gets upset when I text him.. But some other people feel smothered when that happens.

It's all about preference!

[Darkfairie17]

Thanks!

[cherrymarina]

Some guys will call you insecure to make you feel bad. Let's say they do something shady and you say something about it they will call you insecure (shift the blame on you). Definitely get more confidence so he can't trick you into thinking that you are insecure.

[sweettckae]

be less clingy and be more conceited. I hate guys that call girls insecure.

[cherrymarina]

Same here. Guys who call girls insecure are doing it to shift the blame. They know she will doubt herself instead of focusing on his shady behaviour. It's manipulation.

[sweettckae]

@cherrymarina exactly... guys like that need to be dropped off at the end of the earth.

[GingerGuy]

@cherrymarina I feel the need to say in some cases with some guys here lol. A lot of women are insecure, just look at the questions being asked on this site! But yes, there are guys like this.

[cherrymarina]

@GingerGuy Many guys do this, especially if the girl IS a bit insecure because they know how to get to her. It's a shame tactic.

[GingerGuy]

@cherrymarina Yes younger guys especially but don't assume most or all. Especially as guys age and mature, this is less and less the case.

[cherrymarina]

@GingerGuy Yes, I know :) Older guys know women better.

[BoleroL]

A partner calls a girl insecure or clingy when he’s trying to put her down so your opinion on something he said or did has no value. If he really found you insecure and clinging he would not want spend time with you. Believe in your guts if you were insecure or clingy you already have heard that from someone’s then a partner or you would know that yourself before you met him. Man use this trick on girls for ages. This is a sign for you that he can’t deal with problems in a relationship and want all his way. Good luck

[Anonymous]

Work on your self even if you're in a relationship. Ask him what is it that you're doing that is making him say that and try to work on those things. Everyone has insecurities except some more than others so try to balance things out and things will get better!

[Yanoa_Yanza]

By starting to feel confident

And the clingy thing... ask him what makes you clingy and change it. Since you're dating, maybe it means that you're like in need of constant communication. (I'm just guessing )

[RedRobin]

Work on yourself. Find and focus on things you're good at to distract you from your relationship.

[abundantlyrich]

Stop the complaints and start smelling the roses often and stop texting him so often.

[Fearless_banana]

You stop acting clingy and insecure. Thank me later OP

[Melcart23]

There's no situation to fix. He called it how he sees it. But if you're talking about fixing your actual problems, then of course. Just try to be more confident in yourself.

[Anonymous]

Get a life outside of him so he's not your whole world

[Zendrya]

become less insecure, needy, and clingy

[Stephaniedodson87]

He called me insecure when asked him if he's cheating

[actual_dragon_tears]

stop being needy and clingy

[blondfrog]

Just stop being clingy.

[OrdinaryGentleman]

Communication.

[GingerGuy]

This is it exactly, you have to talk to him about your insecurities and thoughts and not let your imagination get away with you. For the clingy, find some hobbies you enjoy, don't rely on him so much. Be happy in your own life regardless of him (he's a bonus, not the only reason you're happy).