A freshman girl likes me and I'm a senior, would it be bad to date her?

[Anonymous]

She's pretty and she likes me, would it be bad to date her? I don't intend to have sex with her or anything.

[ObscuredBeyond]

Been there, done that. Make sure she doesn't have sketchy friends, and also ensure that her mom likes you. If her mom suddenly hates you for no reason, she'll use your age as leverage. If it's obvious there's no sex going on, she'll claim that you having literally any contact with the girl is "stalking behavior" - even if the girl herself says otherwise! Even if the girl ends up being the one stalking you, the mother will make sure you are the one feeling the heat!

I wound up breaking it off with a gal 3 years and 7 months younger because of such drama. But I was one of the few positive influences in her life shaping her away from the direction of her shitty neighbors.

Almost immediately after her mom removed me from her life, she began smoking pot. Which progressed to robbing a Subway store with a toy gun. After she got out on that, she wound up taking the gateway from weed to heroin. And then she got pregnant from a guy she did drugs with. And then she had a few more jail visits due to parole violations. And then she overdosed on heroin and died, 3 months shy of the 11th anniversary of her mom forcing her and me to part ways.

No one other than her mom and step-dad (and maybe her brother) was even allowed to see her body. She was given a rushed, private funeral. Then shipped off to some cemetery I'd never heard of before. I was treated the same as her junkie friends from rehab were treated, even though I'd done nothing to deserve it and had never met them before.

Actually got to talk with some of them at an unrelated memorial gathering. Still can't approve of their habits; but I'd say I got along better with those recovering addicts than I ever did with the holier-than-thou types my family hoped I could befriend instead.

It was paradigm-reshaping, to see all these "clean" types who were complete assholes, and to then see all these broken junkies who were actually capable of being (almost) decent and civil beings able to hold a normal conversation while reserving judgment till the end - and would let you finish a sentence before speaking.

Totally contrary to the "role model" kids I'd met - who would interrupt me and judge me to my face. But when I would call that out, I'd hear nothing but excuses from others trying to shift the blame to me.

Which... helps me understand why those junkies became so frustrated with society, that they'd throw their lives away on drugs in the first place.

[meatballs21]

I was in that position, I was going on 18 and tall, she was a tiny grade 9... I figured it would have been just to awkward and uncomfortable for both of us and didn't pursue it.

[Asker]

I'm not very tall, I'm just slighty taller than her.

[Anonymous]

I can relate! I just turned 17 (grade 12 just late birthday haha) and I like a 14 year old. I get it, trust me. I never considered dating asomeone so young but he's different. He can write music, sing, play piano, he's one of the most talented people in my school, but he is shy and doesn't sing for anyone except me.

Go for it. If you can see a future with her there's no problem. Just don't break her heart (like use her) and you're good!

[Asker]

Wow, freshman are steeping up and attracting seniors lol

[Opinion Owner]

I knowwww! Honestly they're getting attractive too. I know two of the hottest people in my school are in grade nine. One is the one I like and the other constantly checks me out (I doubted it, but he literraly has his eyes glued too me whenever I walk passed him haha)
I don't know how they do it. I wish I was hot in grade 9. Instead, I looked like a literal egg 😂

[Asker]

Yes they are, the freshman I'm talking about is a babe.

[Opinion Owner]

I bet! I hate it though, like I wish they were older!! Sent me a photo through pm, im @falling4UTC 😁 but yea, I wish at least mine was older because its usually strange to have a younger boyfriend. But I'd still date him at the drop of a hat. He freaking wrote me a song like there's no going back now

[Asker]

So, have you asked him out yet? You probably should be the one since he's shy. I asked out the girl I liked and said she yes.

[Asker]

*She said

[Opinion Owner]

We both told each other we like each other. But school is making it conplicated rn. I don't know, we'll figure it out

[Marvelousadventures]

what state do you live in? check local laws, honestly I would say as long as you are respectful to her and don't use your age to try to manipulate or pressure her, then go for it! if you like eachother spend time together have fun and be careful with her feelings if you are going off to college soon. the fact that you aren't trying to get laid makes it seem like you're a good guy. maybe even consider introducing yourself to her parents :)

[Anonymous]

Well... Do u like her or not? But u should know that u would probably have trouble and people in ur school be talking negative about u. Like the fact that u are or will be 18 and u would be with a minor. And would her parents approve of the relationship. And will u really stop her if she tries to have sex with u.

[Asker]

Yes I really do like her, I wouldn't have sex with her while she's still a minor though.

[Opinion Owner]

Well do u know if her parents are cool with it? If u have her parents approval then I think is okay.

[Asker]

Yes, I do.

[cicis_partyy]

Nope it wouldn't be weird. That's the best mindset to have with any girl by the way. I would go for her if I were you

[Asker]

Thanks, I actually do have a crush on her as well.

[cicis_partyy]

Go for it! I really hope everything works out!!

[dudeman]

if you only want to have sex with her then i dont think its fair that you take advantage of such a large age gap percentage. however if you think you actually like her i think its ok.

[taytay10133]

ehh why would you want a 13-14 year old if you are 18

[Asker]

I like her

[xXiTacoXx]

Depends on if you're college or high school students.

[Asker]

High school

[xXiTacoXx]

If you're 18 you can be locked up for statutory rape/child molestation if you do anything sexual with her.

[Asker]

I said I don't intend on doing anything sexual with her

[xXiTacoXx]

But if you hurt her she can lie and say you did, and then boom you're off to jail. It happened to a guy friend of mine and his life has been ruined for years because of it.

[Asker]

I don't think she would do that

[xXiTacoXx]

Neither did he, but now he's paying jail fines to this day, is still having a hard time finding work, is completely suicidal, and wishes he was more careful about who he hung out with back then. I'm saying this for your own good. Don't date anyone who is more than 2 years younger than you while you're in high school.

[Asker]

Sorry, my mind is already made up

[xXiTacoXx]

Don't say I didn't warn you.

[Anonymous]

You're gonna be in college soon and she'll barely be halfway through high school. I think you can be friends but the maturity levels are just a bit too far off.

[Asker]

Maybe you're right, but even if it doesn't work out long term, I don't see a problem with going out on fun dates even if it doesn't last.

[Opinion Owner]

I suppose so. Just don't be too surprised when you realize she's very immature compared to you. I know people say "girls mature faster than boys" but trust me she's fresh from middle school whereas you've been through more than 3 years of high school. There's gonna be a lot of things she hasn't learned yet.

[Asker]

To be honest, I wouldn't mind if she wasn't as mature as me.

[Opinion Owner]

I can get that. There's a reason why some guys go for immature/young girls- innocence. Just don't get too carried away alright? Also I was a senior in hs last year and I would never consider dating a freshman in hs lol cause you're gonna leave soon anyway so no point

[Asker]

Wel, that depends on where your college is, mine isn't far away from the high school. Some couples like that do still date post high school.

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah my college is in the same city and my high school
Its just once you get to college a lot of things change and you're gonna meet so many people
Based on my experience I wouldn't have wanted to be tied down by a boy still in high school

[Asker]

Well, I actually do have a crush on her, if she still likes me after we go out, I would wait for her.

[Opinion Owner]

Cool man you should've said that in the beginning lol
I'm just approaching this logically
Once you throw feelings into the mix the answers would change a little

[Asker]

I thought I might get pedophile comments if I admitted that in the question lol

[Opinion Owner]

Oh yeah I forgot she's about 14 and you're 18
Kinda illegal if things get sexual lol you better be able to control urges then cause even dating her there might be disapproval. Especially from her parents if they find out.

[Asker]

I have no intent of taking advantage of her

[Opinion Owner]

I didn't say you did
Its just there's a chance you two might get caught up in your feelings lol and lose it

[Asker]

I know, I said I don't intend on doing anything sexual

[Asker]

Disregard that last post, that wasn't for you

[Asker]

I think we will be fine, I've gone on this long without sex

[Opinion Owner]

It's easy to say that now but trust me when you start to fall for someone it gets really hard to control your uh passion (?)

[Asker]

There are couples who have saved sex until marriage, they make it somehow or another

[Opinion Owner]

Mhmm say what you will but you won't know how you're gonna handle things till you get there

[OrdinaryGentleman]

Did just that well i was a junior when we dated. Anyways i would suggest that you do not date her unless you wish to lose your sanity. Girls at that age are impetuous

[Asker]

I don't mind immaturity

[OrdinaryGentleman]

Ah, so you haven't seriously dated yet. You are still young and dumb, believe me, dude. immaturity gets old real quick. But you will find that out sooner or later.

[Asker]

The last girl I liked had a thing for bad boys and well, I couldn't cut it.

[OrdinaryGentleman]

So you are letting someone else control the way that you date.

[Asker]

No, what do you mean?

[OrdinaryGentleman]

So you are allowing the past discrepancies with someone entirely different to control your actions dating now. You are going to date her, not for her personality but rather because she likes you and you think she is hot. As i said, you do not have the life experience yet, young and dumb. Also "i am not going to have sex with her", if you don't, she will move on. If you do then you are full of shit. I would never believe a guy your age for a second saying that.

[Asker]

I like her personality

[OrdinaryGentleman]

Oh i bet you do bubba

[PurpleTeardrops2]

Yes it is, if she's still a highschooler. If she's a freshman in COLLEGE and of LEGAL AGE, then jump on it dude

[Ahrixxa]

Yeah you're an adult and she's a minor. You could go to jail if you had sexual intercourse with her

[Asker]

That's why I won't

[pooper89]

Well she's going to be in high school for the next three years. Do you want to deal with that?

[Asker]

Yeah

[addictwithapen]

if you have a pretty good reputation then itd be best to stay away from minors that can cause you legal trouble

[rjroy3]

If it's college you're fine. If it's highschool you shouldn't

[rjroy3]

Still talk and flirt, but don't pull the trigger till she's older

[Anonymous]

It's a little weird, but if you two like each other then go for it!

[Anonymous]

is it highschool... if your 18 and she's 15 I'd tread lightly...

[ikissedtheskyonce]

How old is she? If she is underage in your state, then you only have yourself to blame

[MaiNameIsSunshine]

It's cool, I don't see what the big deal is.

[AleDeEurope]

If you have to ask us, the answer is no.

[Asker]

I mean it wouldn't be the first time...

[Afro-dite9]

College or High School?

[Blackwatch8494]

DONT TAKE THE JAIL BAIT

[gabemichales]

yeah sure