Girlfriend can never hangout?

[ThatOneGuy007]

I've been dating this girl for about three months. We've gone on one date.

Since then, she had to move to another city, and now she lives about an hour away. Ever since she moved, she hasn't been able to hang out.

Over the course of the past two months, I've asked her to meet up about eight times. Each time, she had a different reason as to why she couldn't, such as: she couldn't because she didn't have her phone, her parents wanted her to watch her little brother, or she was held up at a family gathering.
(She also isn't willing to change her Facebook status from "single" to "in a relationship", either. Which is kinda strange. Random guys add her all the time, too.)

As any logical person would suggest, her actions say she doesn't seem interested. However, she's made it clear to me that she IS interested.

This girl means the world to me, and I don't want to break up. So, what should I do?

[guy532]

What? You've been on one date in 3 months and she's your girlfriend. C'mon dude, that's not how it works at all. Secondly, she VERY VERY VERY clearly isn't interested AT ALL. what more does she need to do? She lives an hour away, that's nothing if she's actually interested.

[ThatOneGuy007]

She said she was, though.

[guy532]

yea and her actions say the complete opposite. Always, and I mean always pay attention to a person's actions and not what they say. Talking is easy, taking action requires effort.
She doesn't want to hurt you, it's her way of letting you down easy. She's just done a terrible job at it. She's not your girlfriend, never was and she's most definitely not interested in you at all no matter what she says. A girl who's actually interested in you will go out of her way to see you, you won't even question it, you KNOW she likes you because everything she does points to that.
Seriously dude, you need to forget about this girl. She's just a giant waste of time.

[guy532]

also, my previous girlfriend and I lived 75 miles away from each other for the first half of the relationship. Even though we both had very busy lifes we still saw each other multiple times a week. See that's the difference between being with someone that's actually interested in you and someone who's trying to let you down easy.

[ThatOneGuy007]

And yet, she came on to me first. We also text all the time and she tells me she IS genuinely interested, and she feels bad about never being able to meet up. I don't think she's trying to let me down at all.

[guy532]

whatever do what you want but she's just a giant waste of time. She's not committed and isn't putting in the necessary effort which will eventually lead to her completely losing interest. You're just going to have to learn it the hard way I guess.

[ThatOneGuy007]

We'll see.

[ThatOneGuy007]

Maybe you're right, maybe you're wrong. There's stuff that makes me think she is interested, but there's stuff that makes me feel like she isn't. Thanks for answering, at least.

[guy532]

No worries and best of luck.

[guy532]

also, everyone is telling you the same thing. You need to stop being in denial about this. Whether she's interested in you or not you're in a toxic relationship and sooner or later (like now for instance) it's just going to hurt you that she's not putting any effort in. You've yet to experience what it's like to be with someone that genuinely likes and is interested in you so you think that this is how it's supposed to be. C'mon dude you deserve better than some girl who's not even willing to see you because she lives an hour away. Don't you think so? Really think about it. You want to see her don't you? If you could go see her right this minute you'd drive to her right now? Do you know why that is? Because you actually like her. People's feelings are the same. We all feel anger the same way or happiness or sadness or love or crushes. I hope that gives you some perspective. How about we look at it from another perspective as well. We all have certain needs in a relationship that must

[guy532]

be fulfilled to make us happy. Yours, like most people's, is to actually see their partner as much as possible. She is not fulfilling that for you and therefore you are incompatible, whether she has feelings for you or not is insignificant. C'mon dude have some self respect, you deserve better than a girl who keeps making bs excuses to not see you and then strings you along by telling you she likes you. Honestly, this girl is a selfish bitch and you like her too much to see it. I really hope I've talked some sense into you. I know how much it hurts when you have to say goodbye to the girl you care for m, but it's for your own good in this case. You can find another girl who lives by you and actually spends time with you.

[ThatOneGuy007]

Thanks for taking the time to write all of this. I'll take what you said, keep in mind her side of everything, and go with it.

I'll give her one final chance. She really has had a rough past, and has a lot going on right now, so maybe it's just a really odd set of circumstances. But, if she blows it again, I'll sit her down and talk to her. If she refuses to take my needs and wants into account, I'll end it like, like you said.

Thanks again, I'll award you the best answer when it lets me!

[guy532]

Thanks!

[ptstat]

how horrible is she for not telling you she isn't interested?

[Dylan37]

In the summers me and my girl friend are about an hour and a half away and we've never gone more than 7 days without seeing each other. If she really cares about you it would "hurt" to not see you.

[Virginunicorn]

She's seems mentally checked out.

[AtomicCheesing]

Bail