How do you get over a long, recurring crush?

there's a girl I know from my early teens who I went to school with and ended up in the same university doing a similar degree. I've always had a thing for her and every few years I try pursuing her again and every time it amounts to nothing. we've made out and messed about once, but that was like 5 years ago.

I know I'll never actually get a chance to date her properly, I'm not what she's looking for and she's also one of my sister's best friends so that's a problem too.

So I guess the real question is how do I get over her / forget her when I'm constantly seeing her on campus or through my sister.


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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • Have you tried asking her out before? If not then maybe ask her out on a date. If she says no then just go out with other girls. Meet new people get new hobbies or improve your skills with current hobbies. Find things to distract yourself.

    • I've asked her out a few times. most recently last year.

      problem is we have lunch occasionally anyway when we can, because we are friends above all else. so a date is really no different to our regular lunches, when you account for her lack of interest in me.

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    • She's practically repressed those memories, apparently. that indicates shame, or at minimum, a level of displeasure at the memory

    • also, gym is stupid advice. I've been competing nationally in my sport for 8 years, so including the gym hours and the actual hours training, that's not the problem

What Guys Said 2

  • Distance yourself. And try to look for someone else. If she doesn't like you, then she's not the one for you.

    • I've had other people - and I'm aware she's not for me. intellectual awareness =/= emotional detachment.

      And I can't distance myself without changing universities. which is not happening

    • You can, it's all about control. Dont talk to her. Avoid looking at her. Interacting with her. Keep telling yourself you have to distance yourself from her. You eventually will.

  • Get closer to someone else that should break it away

    • And if she really has feelings for you she will get jealous at the fact that you found someone else and let her feel the space of your presence not there anymore

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    • Got it. Too socially retarded to start conversations

    • Me as well 😪 I'm kind of in the same situation as you

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