I don't like my girlfriend smoking weed, and I told her it's either the smoking, or me. Does this make me a bad person?

[hushmymother2]

I don't care if my friends or if other people that I don't know well do it, it's their lives. But when it comes to a significant other, my "other half" that I will want to spend the rest of my life with; that's when it becomes an issue for me, and I don't know if I'm doing the right thing.

[Blong2u]

No if that's the way you feel so be it but you can't expect her to not enjoys something she obviously does. Ultimatums are just you trying to change a person because of what you want or you wouldn't have to give an ultimatum. You have a problem with it not her so why should she be the one to give it up and what gives you the right to make her choose? If it's who she is except it or don't. Your the one with the problem and trying to change her.

[hushmymother2]

The thing is, I'm not trying to change her, I told her she can choose to either keep smoking pot if she wants to. I just don't want to be apart of that.

[Blong2u]

That's your decision to make.

[XRabbitHeartX]

No why would it? There's nothing wrong with having preferences. To not want a partner who does drugs (even recreational ones) is perfectly valid. Weed smoking is no different to saying you don't want a partner who smokes cigarettes for example. I wouldn't want a partner who smokes it either.

[juliaanita]

I think that it is a legitimate line to draw. you can't please everyone, so you got to please yourself.

Pot isn't that healthy for you anyway.

[stellarvore]

Don't give her an ultimatum. If it bothers you that much - and I understand because it would bother me too - then end the relationship. I don't have time for drug abuse in my life. Let her ruin her life by herself, don't go down with her.

[YeeYeeBrother]

dude ask her why she does it... some people use it as a means to help themselves

[RJGraveyTrain]

It depends: did you know she did it beforehand? If you did it's your fault for dating someone who smokes, it also depends if it's medical. I wouldn't expect her to stop in such cases. However if you didn't know and it's a deal breaker, that's fair.

[ItsAMeWeirdo]

No not really but if you don't know weed actually helps with a lot of personal problems like depression, stress, and etc. so its not really something you can make her choose about its just another medicine. And weed can't kill anyone. So its very safe just don't hair over 5 pounds.

[Akesuke]

I would never ever date someone who smokes, even hardly be friends...
I am kind of allergic to it, but if my boyfriend started to smoke I think I would with him about it...

[Akesuke]

*I would talk

[Anonymous]

Did you know she smoked when you started dating her, if you did it is wrong because you knew what you were getting into. At the same time, if you have a low tolerance for smokers, dont date them in the future.

[hushmymother2]

I did not know prior to dating her that she smoked pot, I should have clarified.

[Opinion Owner]

That makes sense. You shouldn't have to change your standards to date someone. I guess if she is addicted she may need time and support though.

[Anonymous]

No..