Do you believe people generally date others of equal attractiveness?

Question

" Their findings should surprise no one — more attractive people tended to prefer potential dates who were also rated as more attractive " Do you think that attractive people generally have partners of equal attractiveness?  Based on your first-hand and observational experience do you think that's true? Why or why not? elaborate and detailed answers are appreciated.  I know the source/experiment may not be legit and could be full of faults, its just a reference to stimulate thought, no need to take it as gospel.

curiousnorway · Accepted Answer

I thinks it depends. Some people are dating withing their own league when it comes to looks, other doesn't and goes for other qualities like personality, status, economy etc.

I thinks it's more common for attractive people to date other attractive ones, but average dates average and unattractive dates unattractive ones due dating options and that attractive people usually gets more option in dating. So I've seen a lot of couples in real life dating withing their own leagues.

But it exists some exceptions. I've seen a couple where one of them are very unattractive, but the other one is much better looking. They probably dates because of personality.

Sometimes a person I may find good looking dates a person I finds unattractive because they've a different taste than what I've. Looks is subjective, so that plays a role too in addition to what people values more.

I thinks Brad Pitt dated in his own league when he dated Angeline Joe. I finds both of them kinda good looking. But there's people who finds Angeline pretty, but Brad average, so for them he's not dating in his own league. So it depends on how you sees it too.

JohnDoe3000 · Accepted Answer

Yes, they tend to date within their "league". I think your own level of attractiveness has an effect on the minimum treshold you have to find someone else attractive, but only to an extent: a 3 might find a 4 attractive but probably not another 3 and if they're forced to settle for another 3 there will be some resentment that needs a very strong emotional bond/compatibility to overcome in the long term.

Of course with the obesity epidemic, online dating/apps, financially independent women, the end of mass removal of young males through battle/disease/rowing the galleys/being locked up in a monastery/being day laborers in the outback, etc... and the expectation everyone should be able to marry, we're entering new territory.

kaylaS91 · Accepted Answer

No.
I think the only way in which how attractive one perceives themselves to be would affect who they date would be indirect more than anything else. In my own relationship, for example, the thought has never occurred to me that I 'deserve someone better looking' or anything like that. But you'd be surprised how many times I've been told my other people, even classmates I just met, who've made remarks like '.. THAT''S your boyfriend?' Or had my mom tell me that I'm attractive and 'deserve' someone better looking.

Which is a ridiculous notion to me. Dating and successful relationship are not based in any way on a subjective ideal of beauty. Sure, attractiveness in a partner is important but it's also important to remember that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. My boyfriend is sexy af to me and I love him to pieces so anyone who's got beef with that should keep their mouth shut and focus on finding/bettering their own relationship instead. :)

Warmapplecrumble · Accepted Answer

I remember when I was in college (psychology class) they said women tend to go with men who are on their attractiveness scale.  However, men go for women who are more attractive than them regardless where they are on the scale.  (Now this was several years ago and probably is debunked but I believe there might be some truth to it.) Attractiveness is a very complex thing. One aspect of it is beauty. Now everyone has many different meanings. However, my definition of beauty is: Beauty includes 1. Familiarity, 2. Societal Requirements 3. Biological cues on fertility and health.  >>>> it's really what you are used to and is accepted by society. Our thoughts and wants are not necessarily ours.  I feel like we do go for people who match us on our vibrational level but it might not reflect in the physical.  However, I think my boyfriend is as attractive as I am.

ElissaDido · Accepted Answer

I think people usually date others of equal of "value" and not necesarrly equal attractivness.
The use of the word Value might seem controversial, but what i mean is that value can be places in different fields. For example an average rich guy will date a pretty not so rich girl.

DizzyDesii · Accepted Answer

Super attractive Girls usually date less attractive guys than themselves. Super attractive guys usually date girls in their league but still flirt with girls of a lesser attraction. Average people usually stick with average people tho

OlderAndWiser · Answer

Yes, that is certainly my experience. Most people include physical attractiveness on their list of criteria for a mate. For most of us, romantic relationships should include sex and that requires a physical attraction. So. . . people try to date others who are as handsome/beautiful as they can possibly attract.

Browneye57 · Answer

Not only DO people tend to date someone with a similar SMV (sexual market value), they actually SHOULD, and here's why...
1. If your mate is several points above or below your own SMV there will always be a glaring difference in attraction/appearance.
2. The higher SMV will always think less of the lower one - especially women.
3. The lower SMV will always think they're somehow inadequate - they simply cannot compare/compete with their superior mate.
4. If the difference is too great it will tend to work a wedge into the relationship over time.

Women in particular will try to snag a higher SMV - they tend to over-value their own SMV. Men tend to be more realistic about their own place in the mix.

SMV is not only about 'attractiveness' but valuation in the sexual marketplace. In otherwords, a rich guy has a point or two up on a guy of similar attractiveness. Same for gals, if she has other intrinisic qualities besides her looks, then it brings up her value - age is one of these, which leads to... AGE.

A woman's peak SMV is about 20-25. A guy reaches his about 35-40. Once a woman starts to age her youth and beauty starts to fade. A guy not so much, they tend to improve will into middle age. A rich hot 40yo guy can pretty much pull women from 20-60 years of age - the entire age range of the female population. Another way to look at it, why would a rich hot guy want a old saggy woman if he can pull a hot young one?

There's more of this on the interwebs if you want to google it and study. There are some interesting dymanics about it all.

Cosytoasty · Answer

Generally yeah. It's very rare you see he extreme of a hot guy/girl dating the polar opposite. People always bring the money or personality factor into it, but most rich and cool people are physically attractive (somewhat) too.

Most couples are ordinary" and you get a few who make an "exceptionally attractive couple".

HorrorFan · Answer

Within reason, yes.

I do think women tend to date men that maybe aren't as attractive but the reason for that being that they value a man's wealth and ability to provide as a bigger deal than his looks.

Men still value attractiveness as the number one factor, with the woman's age (less baggage, years left of fertility, etc.) also factoring in.

Personality is still important for a long lasting relationship, but you have to clear the attractiveness/success hurdle before this is allowed to truly matter.

anmari2001 · Answer

maybe if you are insecure or desperate then you want a partner who is below your level
depends on many things, there are all kinds of couples

I am not sure what do you mean by attractiveness, only the look or her/his personality and characteristic? because they can be attractinve too

Rainie_ · Answer

Often? Yes, always? No. many of my friends have dated guys whom have been way below their level of attractiveness (in my opinion).

From what I've personally seen, girls are more likely to settle for a less attractive guy than a guy settling for a less attractive girl, if comparing to their own attractiveness.

_lauren_ · Answer

Nope. I've worked in service jobs for a long time and I see a lot of really pretty girls with okay guys. She may find him beautiful, and that's all good. I think people tend to date others that they PERCEIVE as being of equal attractiveness. so obviously that's influenced by our own body image which can raise or lower the bar for potential partners.

TheFlak38 · Answer

Generally speaking yes, but there are other factors as well like social status for example. That's why people refer so often to someone being out of their league. Daisy Ridley is an average next door chick that almost all of us could date based on equal attractivness. But now she has taken a completely different path than the rest of the average looking chicks which makes it difficult for us to date her. Just a simple example a quickly thought of.

ADFSDF1996 · Answer

I'm not sure. What about the not so attractive guys that date pretty women? It's hard for a person to tell how attractive they really are, a person might think they are fairly attractive but too most people that person is below average or a person might think they are not very attractive but too most people that person is very attractive.

cattertone · Answer

most people will want to date people about as attractive as they are. its human nature to seek out a good looking healthy mate so that newer generations are more beautiful and healthier. fast forward to 10,000 years from now and humans will be so beautiful you probably wouldn't even recognize them as humans.

Anonymous · Answer

I feel like usually the girl is better looking.

I have almost ended up like that because attractive guys don't hit on me so freely as average or unattractive men. I also feel more comfortable around average or unattractive men. I can get an attractive man but I don't trust he'll be faithful

zombiebabe · Answer

it depends on the person.. some date because they're mostly attracted to the physical appearance while other people might be attracted to someone due to personality

Phoenix98 · Answer

Yes and no, it's not really a question in which you can give a black and white, yes or no answer to.

amber12A · Answer

This is not true from my personal experience I have seen so many guys with girls who I would not consider equal to them and vice versa I think other qualities is the main reason for this

momo770 · Answer

I don't think so. good-looking is very subjective and my idea may not be yours. A lasting relationship isn't based on looks and that's why I say that.

MattxBenxTom · Answer

I wouldn't have thought so but heck. We're human beings. We probably do

madhatters4 · Answer

i really don't know. i guess by in large it would make sense but of course there are exceptions

BabyBirdy · Answer

Yes and no... it depends. I think I've dated men much less attractive than me and equally attractive

NormaTavish · Answer

No.. relationships don't work like that. The initial attraction is aesthetic but that becomes less important as time goes on. :)

IHaveLists · Answer

Yes but I generally date guys who are more attractive than me

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