While in a relationship is it ok to give the opposite sex compliments?

[Anonymous]

[bigssslittleshow]

That's something you should discuss with your s/o but I think that deep down inside as long as you you know when they aren't around you know how to behave yourself and you aren't embarrassing them, you still hold respect to the realtionship as you would when they are around. I think you can compliment someone else because whatever you say to that person you can say in front of your s/o. But it really cool depends on your trust in the realtionship if you cheated your you don't make them feel wanted or your messing up some how those compliments and paid attention to the opposite sex can ruin their confidence.

[KatMGW]

Yes, of course, it is ok to compliment friends and say nice things to people. Everyone appreciates a sincere compliment and if your partner is so insecure that you can't say "oh so and so you look nice today [more mindless conversation about things like weather/work/whatever]" then they are not ready to be in a relationship. It is not ok to say "yo I would totally fuck the shit out of you" to a complete stranger regardless of whether or not you're in a relationship.

[XRabbitHeartX]

Depends on what really. I think it is innaproprite to for example tell another guy or girl how hot or attractive they are. This seems out of place and a strange thing to even want to say someone else (why notice enough to care about telling them). But if it is like on their academics or work related or in general then I dont see the issue.

[Caaarl]

So even if it's someone you are in a completely platonic relationship with you're not allowed to compliment them about looks. What about a relative? lol

I see where you're coming from but your opinion is a bit extreme. Can a heterosexual woman give other heterosexual women compliments on their looks in a relationship? According to your opinion they should not.

Not to mention physical attractiveness isn't the only thing that matters obviously so there could be complements that aren't about looks that could be inappropriate.

[XRabbitHeartX]

Obviously family members and same sex friends dont count. I thought this would be logical to assume but nevermind 🤣

[Caaarl]

You've never been a completely platonic relationship with a person of the opposite sex who is heterosexual? Not even someone you don't want to date?

[XRabbitHeartX]

Outside of work? No not really. When I was in school yeah but as I have gotten older it becomes harder to find men to just be "platonic" friends with and now that I am in a relationship I really dont desire or feel the need to invest in platonic friendships with guys either. Like there is no need for me or desire. I have my boyfriend, female friends, gay male best friend and family and co-workers to keep me social and happy.

[Tokentexas]

Platonic Men and women friends? Doesn't exsist unless the woman is choosing to not be physical. Vast majority heterosexual men who want to be friends with a woman, at any given will totally have sex with that woman. Staying platonic with the opposite sex will in the very least lead to an emotional relationships, to which most of the time leads to physical relationhips. If you are with someone these become emotional affairs & affairs.

[coachTanthony]

Look the only difference in the spirit of your question is INTENT. What is your intent when giving the compliment? If it's just a compliment then fine but if you have an intent on the compliment going somewhere else well then the answer would be A BIG FAT FUCKING NO. Don't be a creep. Hope this helps.

[JonasOhmKristiansson]

Right on! Finally someone with emotional intelligence

[Tokentexas]

One sided & self absorbed. you're not taking the 2 other people into consideration. Your s/o and the person you're complimenting. If she's with me then she doesn't need to compliment the opposite sex. Dont plant seeds, don't open doors, don't disrespect me. You NEVER know what the other person is thinking about that compliment. Finally of your s/o is not comfortable with it then it should be no issue NOT giving compliments to opposite sex for own ego. Too many narcissist that NEVER think of others. There's more than just what you think, emotionally unintelligent.

[Bas96]

Why shouldn't it be? I know it's 2018 and some people are going crazy about these things, but it is absolutely fine. Compliments are always good, depending on how you say it to them. Why wouldn't someone want compliments? Everyone wants to be appreciated by the other people.

[Tokentexas]

Because its disrespectful if your s/o is not comfortable with it. Why is it so important to give a stranger, co-worker or anyone of the opposite sex a compliment? It should not matter to you more about they feelings of these people over that of your partners. Any of those people can even get things misconstrued & feel you're opening a door, or do more things to be complimented by you. All things can lead to emotional affairs. Be respectful of your s/o over the feelings you want to give the opposite sex with a compliment. Small sacrifice really.

[Some_Goof]

It's more than okay I guess. I mean it's alright, you should compliment each other here and there

[pure7]

Ofcourse you can ! Its all about what words you use and the context. Say a girl got a new haircut you can say things like: it suits you or it looks great/better than before. Using words like cute and hot however are more likey making you look like a flirt.

[Tokentexas]

You dont know what other people think. That innocent compliment can go further in thier head than yours. You can acknowledge the haircut, "Hey, you got a haircut!". If they ask if "you like it", a polite "yeah" is all thats needed. Acknowledge the new thing, reinforce their decision positively. They feel good, you didn't offer an unsolicted opinion to boost ego, they were affirmed without thinking you meant more than intended. Which was noticing a haircut. Really though why compliment any stranger? Needless. Or why compliment a co-worker on physical appearance? Get over yourself and wanted to please other people & please your s/o while respecting them.

[Paztelcat]

No not really, depending on what kind of compliment and to whom. Compliments are initiators of relationships, and with the opposite sex it may make your partner feel as though you are trying to hook in another partner, or feel unsafe someone may start liking you.

[Caaarl]

So if a teacher compliments a student about how they did well in class that's an indicator of a relationship? YIKES!

[Tokentexas]

@Caaarl lets fo to an extreme! Teacher/student is never an okay relationship any compliment given on work done or accomplished is fine, & more so because its whats expected. Now take that teacher telling a student they look cute in that outfit or they loke they way the do their hair, which are physical appearance compliments, and you example has a very clear answer. Its wrong! Compliments on achievements or work:Good jobs & way to gos all day for anyone. Compliments on physical appearance to the ooposite sex, easier not too & remain 100% respectful of your partner.

[Tokentexas]

I see most answers revert to how you think about it or meant by it. But must take into consideration who you are complementing & how the see & feel about it. Its a slippery slope to openly feel okay about complementing the opposite sex when you're already committed. Many emotional affairs start from innocent words & friendly interactions with no intent. But compliments start, each hears things the others likes, and it can snowball. Also if your partner is not comfortable with it, I'd respect their feelings first over mine just wanting to compliment the opposite sex. I can think it & not HAVE to tell someone, small concession if you're in Love. Respect them, compliment them.

[whattothink]

I think it depends on the compliment. Like I have several married coworkers that are guys. If they get a new haircut/glasses/tie and it looks good I'm going to tell them. Not in a I'm going to report you way, but in a hey changed up your look and it works kinda way

[Anonymous]

Who are you giving compliments to? Your partner or others of the opposite sex? If you're giving compliments to your partner of the opposite sex, that's awesome. If your giving compliments to somebody else opposite your sex, you might end up having a quarrel with your partner.

[Laura276]

It depends on the context and how the comments are worded. If my partner said to me something like, "Babe, those jeans really suit that chick's figure. They'd look awesome on you". My reaction would also depend on how secure I was in the relationship and on how my partner made me feel and his thoughts and comments about my body. If I were rarely complimented and felt my man thought my body was flawed and yet he complimented other women, I would feel insecure and hurt.

[Xoxocutekitty]

Yeah it's fine. It's almost easier to give compliments because it is more objective and doesn't automatically mean you're romantically in to them. You can just be like nice eyes, you're kind, you're really funny and it means just that

[dragonfly6516]

Yes, so long as it's tasteful and "safe for work".

I personally don't care if my man flirts with others, so long as it's known that it's just in fun and not to be taken seriously.

[scrubluv84]

Depends on how it's done. For instance "nice shirt or I like your hair" I think is ok. Pretty much anything beyond that I don't. Also depends on how your spouse feels about it. If my girl doesn't like me complimenting other women I think it would be wrong to do so. You should always keep your spouse's feeling into consideration that is if you care for them. That is just my opinion

[MommysBoyToy]

Good answer

[chetanic78]

Yes. I absolutely believe so. I am married, and happily so. But that being said, I'll make comments about an attractive girl, and she'll make a statement about an attractive guy... it keeps things fresh... and it honestly makes you pay more attention when the relationship may begin to get stale. If you don't care what he says, ... or he doesn't care what you say... one of y'all will end up cumming on another person.

[nbriannem]

Honestly I think it is a lot of unnecessary stress added on your partner you dont need to compliment any other girls if your with your girl there is just no point in it throw yourself into the relationship and dont add the drama or the stress on your lady

[oftheHowl]

Talk to your partner of what compliments they consider okay or not okay. Usually the limit is "nice" or "good", don't use cute, hot, sexy, etc.

[MommysBoyToy]

Very logical and the right way to handle it. Great post.

[ocho8x4life]

Yes! When is it every wrong to tell the person that you are with that they look stunning, beautiful, amazing, etc. Even if you are with someone for 10 years, you still remind them of how beautiful they are to you. You never stop giving compliments to a person you are with. Remember if you are going to say it, then you better mean it.

[sophiealice]

Hell yes. We kinda appreciate being appreciated by our partner. But you know them better than anyone else so use your best judgement to gage how many compliments are too many. But there is no harm in letting someone know that you care and that they are important to you!! 😁

[oftheHowl]

He's asking is it okay to compliment people you're *not* dating

[sophiealice]

The same wprks for if you aren't dating though. Use your judgement but a little kindness can go a long way

[PinkMichae]

I don't have any issues with my so complimenting another woman. I'm secure with his love and attraction for me.

[Malita55]

As long as it’s just about their personality, achievements or maybe their makeup/outfit but never directly shout their body or face because that’s disrespectful

[cheapstickfreak]

usually, if the woman is immature about this kind of topic, and mostly envious girls are, don't fking do it. a mature woman would understand it, but don't count on that too much. you need to asses her character before speaking.

[TypsyGypsy]

Just because your in a relationship don't mean that has to kill your personality! Compliment them but don't mean it in a sexual, low key tryna hit on em type of shit you know? It's called having a good personality

[zulfiqarali]

I think there is a thin line between compliment and flurting... it should be avoided when in relationship