He thought I was making fun of him and now he can't let it go?

So the guy I'm dating long distance for about 9 months. I love him. He's amazing. But there's this thing that's been bothering me. About a month ago he stayed at my place for about two weeks. In that time frame we had an amazing time, but after he left he called me like a few days to a week later saying that I had been making fun of him and it really hurt him. He was all like "I thought you cared about me I wasn't expecting you to start making fun of me". I was upset and confused by this because I do not remember making fun of him at all. Sure, playful teasing but apparently he thought I was serious. Well, we talked it out and I let him know that I wasn't being serious and I'll try not to tease any more.

Then a few days ago, he sends me this enormous text out of the blue about how he felt like he needed to readdress it and how it was still bothering him and he needed to "get it off his chest" by basically telling me how horrible it was that I was making fun of him. I told him that I thought he had forgiven me and that we moved on. But he just restated everything he said the first time. So I thought I cleared it up the second time, ending with the fact that we should let it go and move on, and reassured him I wouldn't tease (and I hadn't been!).

Well tonight we were talking and he told me how much he cared for me, and I told him that he meant the world to me. He responds with "You don't have to say that". And of course I probe because that's not the correct response lol. Well apparently he didn't want me to feel like I HAD to say it back, and he is skeptical about fake people. I asked if he thought I was being fake, he said no. Then he goes something like "Just ever since you made fun of me it made me question if you truly cared. But it's fine now." I just didn't respond.
When will he stop hanging this over my head? All I did was tease him like twice about silly stuff. I don't know what to do! I just want to stop feeling guilty about something so insignificant!

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I used to have this distant relationship guy and he is exactly the same. He would be insecure and hurt if i tease him or say something that i didn't really mean it (mostly harmless things). My text for him would also always be over analyzed and turned into big deals while all i said in the text were just some harmless and honest, neutral thoughts. This kind of relationship will be a struggle if you guys don't figure out how to really understand each others, and it's hard because talking through text and phone calls are never enough, not to mention they can lead to misunderstandings quite often. My advice is to tame your ego and try to express that you really care for him rather than defense yourself or else he will be more withdrawn and thinking you are selfish. Be more patient while talking to him and also careful when giving opinions or jokes. As long as you guys are willing to make the relationship work, you will find ways to stick around longer.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Well the next time you get together do something really corny and embarrassing so he had something to tease you back with and call it even

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What Girls & Guys Said

08
  • Poor dude is super insecure. If you do really care for him just try to see things in his perspective and always take in account for his vulnerability to things.

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  • I think, he needs some more time to grow up. In the end you will be ok, or be fed up. Time will show.

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  • What did you tease him about? Was it something personal?

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  • He is just really pussy, he is probably really insecure and just can't take a tease

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  • He seems like a massive beta

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  • That sucks.

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  • This is why long distance with teenagers dont work out. Y'all are childish or he is. Break up with him or just string him on so you have someone to talk to.

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  • He's incredibly insecure.

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