Why are there negative feelings about white guys who date East/Southeast Asian women?

I've generally never heard this stuff said about any other interracial combination. Comments like:

"Yellow fever"
"Creepy"
"Fetishist"

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Most Helpful Girls

  • I think it's because some people assume Asian women are submissive and 'obedient' because of their small stature and their facial features and body type in general. But it's not really creepy unless the guy goes out of his way to only date Asian women because he thinks they are more submissive and easy to control.

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    • The irony is that they are usually not submissive and easy to control (ask a guy whose Japanese or Chinese wife insists on full control of the family's finances). The reason for that stereotype is that it's considered very bad in East Asian cultures to lose your temper (being emotional is tolerated somewhat more in Korea).

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    • So are women who only date taller men and go out of their way to do so creepy? It is pretty much the same thing.

    • No of course not because the dating world is riddled with doubled standards and injustice

  • My best friends are all Asians so I guess I can answer this. The negative comments arise because the truth is there are a few of white guys who date Asian girls solely because of their race. This is coming from my Asian friends. I have this Chinese friend who dated one white guy just to find out that he dated her just because of her being Asian. He ended up cheated on her with another Thai girl but eventually married a Russian girl. My friend almost commit suicide because of him. This is just one story. I know more from my Asian friends.
    However, of course not all white men fetishize Asian women. There are many who are just naturally attracted to them.

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    • @desidoll- have any of your friends had good experiences with white boyfriends or husbands?

      From what I understand from Chinese friends, cheating on or even breaking up with a Chinese woman is viewed as deeming her as not worthy as a girlfriend rather than merely the cheater's personal failing.

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    • @WalterRadio Hahaha yea these two nations both want to stand up for their own bahasa.

    • 7d

      Thanks for the MHO

Most Helpful Guys

  • It's the image of the old fat bald white tourist in Asia looking for a wife because he's not high value enough in his own western country. It's probably the only interracial combo where it actually happens?

    It's a little different to white guys dating western born Asians they get much more of a pass because it's seen as a more *equal* deal.

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    • That type of guy will indeed only have bar girls interested in him, but there are also older European women that do sex tourism or get husbands in a somewhat similar manner from Africa or the Middle East.

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    • Here in Germany, the most common scheme is to marry an older woman around 50 or so in order to get permanent residency or citizenship (sometimes they will even pay her), then divorce her and marry a woman from their own country (often being paid by her family to do it).

    • 7d

      Ty for MH!

  • I don't get it either, I just think people are sad, bitter and jealous and take it out on people and try and make people feel bad simply for what they find attractive.

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What Girls Said 6

  • I only think their obsession is weird when they think Asians are perfect just because they're cute. Otherwise they can date anyone who makes them happy.

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    • Would you think the same about any other interracial coupling

    • @Nachowedgie: I think to some extent there is somewhat of a double standard regarding wm/af couples, i. e., that it is OK to be openly negative about them.

    • 7d

      @Nachowedgie well its Asians and to an extent Eastern Europeans that have that reputation so I can't say the same about other races. But be free to date whoever you like.

  • Maybe because a lot of people don’t get the hype.
    I mean in my opinion a lot of Asian girls look like fragile stick figures. I don't know but maybe that’s what guys are into these days..🤷🏾‍♀️
    However, there is SOME truth that men in general who only have a thing for Asians tend to have a fetish thing going on. Probably because of the preconceived notions about Asian ladies being submissive.
    Which isn’t 100% wrong...

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  • We are in open relationship.

    And my husband have sex with Asian girl from Pakistan, but we don’t see it as negative.
    Matter of fact; he’s even looking for another girl from South Asia

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  • just another dumby generalization

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  • Because they are jealous. Duh

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  • To be honest I've seen some really hot white guys with some ugly Asian girls which cause me to believe that white guys like any Asian girl hence the stereotype of them having yellow fever

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    • Asian friends tell me that white guys seem to find Asian girls attractive that usually aren't considered attractive by Asian guys. That makes me wonder if white guys like Asian women who are a little bigger than average.

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    • @Logorithim
      " if white guys like Asian women who are a little bigger than average"
      I married pair of friends of mine I've known for almost 20 years is Filipino F/WM. He specifically can't stand larger women and pointed out how fat the average American woman is compared to the average Filipina.

    • @WalterRadio: Yeah, that's a big reason for white guys' interest in Asians, but a little bigger than the average Asian is still thin by US standards.

What Guys Said 14

  • I have dated a LOT of East and SEA women.

    Many of those women are hookers. Find the gaggle of Filipino and Thai wives at a military base and I guarantee 2/3rds+ of them are hookers the men met at a bar. I read somewhere that by the fall of Saigon, 20% of the women there between 17 and 60 had prostituted themselves at some time during the war. Westerners sometimes wrongly assume they are all hookers. (I never date bargirls; I can't stand them)

    They tend to have less of a hangup over age than Western women. It is fine for a 19 year old girl to be marrying a 50 year old guy in their minds. But it drives Western women batty.

    There is usually a disparity in socio-economic position for the SEA women. An American or European making $45,000 a year is rich in their minds. Westerners often automatically assume they are gold diggers (and some are).

    These women are often much sweeter and kinder than the typical hardened bitch Western woman (applies mostly to single/divorced women over 30). They despise the competition.

    East Asian women (Korean, Japanese, and non-mainland Chinese), are usually more intelligent than their western counterpart. They can be sweet, pretty, slim, and smart; all the things that a western woman hates.

    The labels you described should only apply to those few guys who are wrapped around a culture, of which a girl from that culture is a piece of his collection. It exists, but is rare. Mostly, white guys who date Asian women simply want someone with certain positive traits that are not as common among white women. Also, it is because Asian women want to date them.

    A successful, intelligent, respectful white man gets chased by ambitious, smart, pretty Asian women. That works for me.

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    • Although you've made some really accurate points here, I'm compelled to point out that Vietnam was actually a pretty prudish society during the Vietnam War and it's only in recent years that out-of-wedlock sex has become common among younger people. It's nothing like Thailand or the Philippines.

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    • Oh, sure, there was plenty of that (and not unique to Vietnam), just that it wasn't as longstanding as in Thailand and the Philippines. It wasn't just white guys, either- nonwhite US troops and Korean troops that also served in Vietnam also had Vietnamese gfs.

      The image of a wm-af couple should have caught up with the times, though, since these days These couples typically meet on University campuses or professional workplaces, as you have.

    • The last Asian women I've been with were a law student, a nurse, a marketeer, an engineering student, a business student (and rich daughter of a C-level executive at a major corporation)... nothing to be wanting.

  • Because racist with small minds always want to keep their "bloodlines" "pure". Then again their are a small percentage of people who have a fetish. But that will be the same percentage of people who have any fetish whether it be racial, or a body part etc.

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  • Well there is the presumption that white guys who cannot find white women who will tolerate them will get go to Thailand or wherever to find a white who will accept them just to get into a better situation in life
    Wether it is true or not is another matter

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  • Cause it is a fetish, i have 2 white coworkers that literally gawk at allll east Asian girls. Even the not so appealing ones.

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    • Some do have a fetish, but, trust me, far from all.

    • Well, i dont truly believe its always a fetish but i does seem like a lot of times it is.

  • We are just in the negative stereotyping area for some reason some combinations in interracial dating draw ire white men/asian women, white women/black men - There is probably an element in each race who feel everyone should stay in their own race, bit 17th century I think.

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  • I think it's because racists can't get their heads out of their asses. It's the same reason why someone is said to have jungle fever for liking black people.

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  • Honestly I dont get why people are so worked up over interracial dating. As long as they are human it doesn't matter. Anyone of us gets cut, we all bleed red.

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  • not in my world.
    it's not my "thing;" however, it's their business and choice, not mine.

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  • Being in the midst of this: Especially Thailand and the Phillippines for some part are known for sex-tourism. To a certain extent, these stereotypes are justified. Myself, I am also frequently ''judged'', simply because timing, location and ethnicity match. I can assure all of you guys not being here: the local ladies cook water the same way they cook it at your own places... ;) // Where does a ''negativity'' come from? I see two major motivations: One is a sort of envy; which has no base or realistic foundation, but just comes from the stereotypes I mentioned. One other is disapproval where I actually join in: to be with an Asian lady is ok - but for the right reasons (and feelings), please.

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  • It becomes closed off if everyone feels the same and it catches on... I guess

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  • I don't get it. To me they are just other people.

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  • Why should we even care. Screw who you want. Yolo.

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  • Cause they bought them

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  • White women won't have sex with you if they know you dated an Asian girl. They kill you with their eyes in the street if they see you walk around hand in hand with Asian girls.

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    • I don't believe that for one minute (I have had plenty of sex with white women after having had Asian gfs). White women have plenty of options.

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    • A Korean girlfriend I had wanted to have a white girl join us in bed. It never happened because she was too picky, but it was always amusing.

    • I've never heard of that being a problem in Germany. There are some guys with Asian gfs or wives, but they're most likely to be Thai here, and I've never heard a German women express jealousy for them or any other Asian women. German guys who like foreign women prefer ones from the Balkans, Poland or Russia other than Thailand.

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