Sooo here’s the thing I know it can be difficult to see when it seems like guys just flock.
Being chased means you are at the whim of whoever shows up and have absolutely no control over if that even happens at all or with anyone you like.
What does having a choice mean if there are no options you would choose?
It’s like being vegan in a restaurant where it’s all meet. You can say that’s wasteful and ungrateful whereas it would a totally make me very ill to eat that food.
I would and have traveled miles to get food I can eat. People expect you to just stay out and make do.
It isn’t just a matter of “ well iI if she just wants she may have no control” if she decides to Persue, many guus will turn her down JUST for that. Her gfs will tell her she’s a thing desperate. Guys who liked her will not ecen understand themselves why they feel suddenly turned off.
So she can be bold and go after what she wants and be punished for it. Or wait around like a loser forced to settle on whatever shows up and be miserable. Or not dare at all.
Women can’t have sex without risking reputation. Stuff guys don’t even have to think about. Saying yes too soon. having sex bc they like the guy and want to. Not getting raped. Not being strung along bc the guy just wanted sex. Even saying hey I had fun let’s do it again, is something men expect to be the ones to say.
Obviously not everyone reacts badly to women being direct. And good for the women who ignore that. But it’s a lot of extra energy to just ignore being told to be a deaf and dumb until a guy taps you in the shoulder. And like I said guys will reject you for being a real person.
Also women don’t get chased even by guys they don’t want, after a certain point while they are still relatively young.
You are basically imagining horny guys on campus chasing every single 20 year old they see.
This is not what it is like for women in the real world with jobs , from 25 up.
Anyhiw main point is you severely - like many men- exaggerate this “ choosing” power.
“Men risk Reje toon, women just choose.”
Women are rejected by any guy they like that doesn’t show up for her to choose from. Or any guy she approaches who may have been interested but lost interest bc she didn’t “ wait”
What does it mean to have power to choose when you don’t have power to act.
If you ad w crush on a girl and 500 girls you were not interested in, showed up just for sex, but if you had sex with them in the mean time, no other girl would date you.. certainly not your crush m. it’s not really “power “
Okay, let's assess 1. Yeah no one has a problem with girls asking out guys that's something girls make up so they have an excuse not to do it 2. Men, while we don't get slut shamed as often, we do get virgin shamed that's something girls don't have to worry about as much and it's a lot harder to not be a virgin than it is to not be a slut 3. Yeah we normally don't get used for sex but we get used for money 4. You can't equate a guy not pursing you to rejection that's a false equivalency because a lot of the time a guy won't pursue a girl simply because he isn't confident she'll say yes or he isn't exactly crushing on her but would still say yes if she asked
No man would ever reject a girl just because she approached him. Actually very few women have the confidence to do that, I've only ever been hit on once by a female model and fuck me did I like that
Unfortunately, Many guys Would And do reject on that basis.. . If you dated guys, you would know this.
I was not trying to equate not being approached as rejection on its own. But not getting approached within your model of women get approached and guys Persue.. it’s equal
Whether the guy gets rejected by the girl he wants, or the girl doesn’t get approached by the guy she wants... in both cases they don’t get who they want
If women were equally free to approach - then it is not equal. But there is a TON of stigma attached.
My point is being approached doesn’t actually make you free to “ choose”
And “ they only wants sex example“ - doesn’t matter if it’s Sex or candy or toys or mine or status etc.. whatever they are offering, it is temporary and it is not what you want mkr is it from whom you desire..
In the ex. These women don’t like you in a real way, and they are not the woman you want. So it’s not a power to choose from.
Of course men will often reject women that show interest in the guy. It's not like we like every girl. I've personally not reciprocated interest back in plenty of women. What I was saying is that it's not bad that they show interest. It's just that if they aren't the right one for me, of course just like women, I wouldn't accept them.
I'm not saying the stigma doesn't exist for women but I've only heard of it from people on the internet. I've never noticed judging women negatively for approaching men. I always loved it when they did it lol.
It's very helpful that I know that this may exist in women's minds though. No wonder women seem so apprehensive to even make eye contact with a guy.
Oh absolutely Women should be rejected if the guy isn’t interested. No disagreement lol
I meant though in cases where he WAS interested and had intended to make a love hit she does first. He may feel she
stole his honor or
she’s too assertive or
she will be controlling or
she Will cheat on him or
must be crazy bc if she was sane, guys would approach her and she wouldn’t be forced to approach-
>>Or whatever nonsense they make up lol 🙄🤷♀️
I agree you do hear a lot Aboit it online.. but I’ve run into it offline as well. It’s real thing. Maybe not so Often, but I’d say people who do think that way, are loud enough that women commonly assume it’s bad even if they otherwise want to. Which sucks.
I’m totally all for Equality in Humiliation— everyone having to suck it up and ask. I wish it would just get started so It stops being a big deal and we can stop analyzing it to death High five 🙌
"I meant though in cases where he WAS interested and had intended to make a love hit she does first. He may feel she"
Do you have any kind of documented proof of this? I'm being sincere. I've never heard of anything like this and my inclination is to I think this is a rationalization to justify the girl's ego--meaning in her head she thought he liked her but in reality he never did.
Equality when asking people that would be amazing lol. That will never happen though because the dynamic is already set up for men to do it and in reality pretty much no girl is going to want to have to take the initiative when they're already getting attention. I don't know if that makes sense.
I kinda feel like if they have an issue with you showing interest in them to where they wouldn't date you because if it, they probably aren't guys you'd want to date anyway. That preference of theirs seems petty to me so you can think of it as a good way to screen them out anyway.
oh I AGREE lol I will make sure to be dude that everyone so I can know for sure how not great these seeing my great guys are’s it’s easy to be great when you feel in control of everything. I am not impressed by the idea of a guy approaching me. It’s how he reacts to my approaching him , that I admire
That is why I really don’t understand women who worry that a guy they like will think they are desperate for asking him out. Totally maybe he WILL. But isn’t yet a Behavior you want to KNOW about before you get too attached.
I highly doubt he would just have that one issue where he has to be in complete control for no good reason, but otherwise he’s a sweetheart. Not likely...
Most often turns out he’s a control addict, and using “ tradition” as an excuse rationalize feeding his habit. No one needs that and people with that mind set shouldn’t be indulged.
I wish women would stop using it as an excuses to not Ask guys out. Let the losers -who otherwise liked them but got urged off when they had a kind of their own- reject them and call ty desperate and good riddance. Stupid only sticks around , if you accommodate it. 🤨
Yeah I find it odd that a guy would care about that. If she did it in a way where she seemed slutty or easy, then I understand but if she is just normal showing interest, that seems fine.
Girls don't want to ask guys out mainly because of the risk of rejection mainly but also it also feels good to have the person pursue you. It's understandable. I like a girl that can show interest in me and it gets annoying they are are so inhibited towards showing it, but I also enjoy make a woman feel desirable when I show interest. There's something really beautiful and intimate about sharing feelings for a person that way.
The on reason is they don’t want to appear “ desperate”
No one likes rejection. It’s jist sort of having interest in a person. You experience it whether you do or not bc Its based on the lack of reciprocation not just someone saying “no”.
It isn’t just that guy seeing her as desperate. It’s the concern of will ruin her reputation. People will assume something is wrong with her and not way to date her.
Fear of rejection is the dullest reworn bc obviously that’s always a risk. Even if you don’t ask someone you risk rejection getting into a relationship period.
I think anyone who is willing to date hut will not ask out bc they think they fear rejection- is disconnected form their true motivation.
online it's easy to be aproched but the DTF kinda Guy ruins the experience all the time see there's a lot of accounts online saying so I'm looking for partner I'm looking for relationship when you start talking to them and then literally by the time the moon comes out just like you stop thinking you slack off in very honest questions like how was your day and start saying things like geez that's nice photo I wish it was just a tiny bit lower...
now don't get me wrong I promise you that I'm trying to not be bias based on my own experience. but I'm a girl and YES I do like to have fun. and that is okay aswell. but that does not meen I want you to litraly only ask how I am when you want some tits shoved in your face.
now dating is a ball game that is a unicorn I won't lie. I'm not talking about the quick crab a coffee or a light dinner to pretend that you are going to do somthing other than having fun. I'm talking about picking the girl up from home actually getting out your car and knocking on the dore. now role reversal I have asked many men out and if I ask I pay that my dear people is equality. and if I ask I puck you up from your house getting out of my car and knocking on your door.
I only said no because it's ridiculous to think women have to have all those physical features in a man to be attracted to him. If that were the case women would only date guys that all looked the same. Yet you see women with men that have different body types, with bald heads, different cultures and races that have a variety of features, different penis sizes, eyes, etc... Now I'll give you the height thing. For some reason a lot of women do want a guy that's taller than them. So find a short woman. But some women can't handle a guy with a bigger penis. I think a lot of women fantasize about how a bigger dick would feel. But once they have it can be too painful. There's also women who love the daddy belly on a man.
Now if all that wasn't your reasoning of why you think men have it harder in the dating world I would have said yes they do have it harder. Why? Because women have more real options especially on the dating apps. Men deal with a lot of the fake bots. Also I believe women drag their feet about meeting up. And yes women don't pursue as much as men so men have more risk of rejection.
From a guys perspective yes. From a girls perspective not necessarily. Girls have it easier getting sex and getting free shit. That's it. So if you define easier time as in easier path to sex. Sure, girls have that easier. If you define it as getting treated well and getting free shit then sure on average girls have it better on average.
Past that it's about the same, just a different set of problems. Girls have to think about their reputation of not seeming like a slut to their friends or surrounding environment. Guys don't. Meaning a girl is motivated to not do what guys are motivated to do. Take risks.
Girls have to think about not pissing other people off for doing what they want with a guy physically. Guys don't for the most part. Meaning again girls are motivated to not do what guys are motivated to do (atleast overtly). Be more bold.
Girls have to think about whether or not this guy 1. is a good option 2. if he can be trusted physically and 3. whether or not he's interested in more than just sex. While for the most part guys don't have to think about that. Sure girls have to be careful about choosing a guy that's low risk for rape, but she's also thinking if the guy is good in bed or if he's worth it past just a one night lay and in the event he is whether or not he's even the guy who may have those intentions of sticking around.
If you look at things from the perspective of intentions and motivations things balance out much more than you think. It's just that for guys and girls our motivations don't necessarily line up and can at times be opposed. Girls have an easier time getting what guys want. Guys have an easier time of getting what girls want.
You could argue it's a chicken or the egg situation and that the reason they don't care is because it's easier for them to have sex. But the same could be said for men. Do men not care as much about getting a girlfriend, because it's not hard to find a girl who wants commitment? Personally I know I feel no rush to get into a relationship. a lot of girls do feel an internal pressure to do so.
Granted a really really hot girl can easily get a boyfriend who would commit. But a really really hot guy can easily have sex. But that's a matter of attractiveness not so much the fact of being a male or female.
Not really. Most girls end up being the ones who reject and have men come up to them, but men choose who they get rejected by and ultimately who they date. It’s very rare for women to go up to the guys “they” really want and put themselves out there. They usually wait for that guy or another to come meet her. There’s exceptions but for the most part girls don’t make the most important move-the first one.
In terms of “choosing” men have a higher chance of finding a partner they want in terms of looks and personality because they can just simply, meet girls until they meet that right one. Most women leave it to chance.
Have you ever heard the phrase “Don’t look for love, let it find you?” It was meant for women. Most men who wait and hope for a women they want to come ask them will die alone.
For guys all it really takes is to be confident, have a healthy body and a job and most won't have trouble getting girlfriends, granted, they’re going out there and approaching. Women have it a bit harder since most guys want a sexually attractive looking women before they even bother getting to know them. Guys have it a bit easier. A man can be butt ugly but if he's charming and makes a girl feel good she’ll marry him.
In terms of finding an “ideal” partner, men have it easier. In terms of finding a “good looking” partner, women have it easier IF they look good themselves but it won’t guarantee them a good one.
If a woman is confident enough to approach men AND she’s attractive though, she has it easier than all of us.
I don't think women necessarily have it all that easy. I do think they would like men to think that because they brag about how they can always get a date, and they do enjoy if it bothers men. Because they want men to envy something they feel they can have more.
Definitely harder for men. I read the girls answers and it basically just boiled down to them not knowing what guys have to go through to actually get a yes. They don't realize most guys don't have options. They don't realize how many times a guy will get rejected before actually hearing a yes. Women can either wait for someone to come to them, or go out and ask someone and well all know why they refuse to do the latter, because it's the harder option, but women will never admit that men have it worse
Imagine being an employer and getting hundreds of applicants. Your job is to pick the best one. You have to, from the interview process, determine: are they a good fit, are they being earnest, is their personality going to be a good fit for you, what if they are a good fit but not good at selling themselves, you can't conceivably try out each one so you have to know how to pick well. And that's a lot of things to consider when you have so many people. And even then you have to be worried if they're just talking a good game, lying, or something else. It's a commitment of time, energy, that you have to get right lest you miss out on someone good or put emphasis on someone that just knows how to talk the talk. It's no so simple.
Getting someone is not the aim. That might be enough for a guy but women have to determine quality. Like an employer they have to find the best one, not just find one.
Firstly, that overview is extremely vanity based, not everyone dates based on physical appearance.
Secondly, are you kidding dating is a royal pain I the arse for women because we have to deduce which men are genuine and which are just chatting bs to try it on.
And finally, dating is not easy in any way shape or form for any gender, especially this modern day dating which has become so cold and impersonal it's practically impossible to pluck up the courage to put your self out there in the first place.
Okay, yes and no. Dating isn't easy for most people of any gender and to say one has more is wrong. Not to mention this isn't something that can be measured - only decided and opinionated on. To me, men have it easier. It's not as bad for them if they choose to sleep around and you never hear about the crazy ex boyfriend, it's always the crazy ex girlfriend. However, I know that for men it's likely the opposite. Women probably have more partners to choose from sometimes and while the picture you listed isn't accurate at all, other things come into play as well. It really depends on who is asking and who is answering.
Bruh, i know enough about how life works for this topic. I've seen this kind of thing happen on more than a few occasions, women aren't gods, yes they have it easier but you're blowing it out of the water here... aslo, dont you think that if i didn't know what I was talking about i wouldn't say anything at all in fear of embarrassing myself? Use your head my guy. You think you know a lot about women, but you're just blinded with hatred and you think being older means you know more. In some cases that can be true, but not with your argument pal. Have a nice day and dont have an aneurysm.
Yes, you SHOULD use your head! But, you have at least another 10 years before you'll be able to do that. Aneurysm? Over what? You being a dumb little kid that thinks he knows more about life than me? The issues I have in front of me (and you'll eventually have in front of you) are WAY bigger than something as picayune as that kiddieland bullshit you're on about!!
Never said i knew more about life than you, let's get that out of the way first, i said you're argument of how women lives are as easy as you put it was ridiculous and false. Next, you dont know what I've been through so dont assume im like these other "little kids" as you put it. Im almost certain you've been through things that i haven't yet, but that still isn't the point, so Let me remind you, in case your memory is failing you, the point is that you have no idea what you're talking about and you need to introduce off topic things into your argument to fill in for your clearly damaged ego from a comment from a 16 year old on the internet. Very immature for a man over 50.
I dated a Chinese woman for 3 years. Treat her like royalty, you get it back. Unless she vanishes for no clear reason. They're impulsive, have lots going on, and don't always think to tell you what's going on before leaping into the fray, leaving you scratching your head at decisions of hers that make no sense.
Long story short, she never hassled me about superficial traits. But then global politics got uglier. And she got cut off from me. What's two lovebirds to a man like Xi, when he loses human trafficking money due to Trump and now has a score to settle?
In my opinion; Because in a guys' mind, we can just walk up to girls and only worry about rejection at worst case, also guys can be more desperate, you know what I mean.
But In a girls' mind, they might think more about the situation, or maybe be prone to worry more about being if she's being used and also the guys' intentions and other things. Maybe even like what would this guy would do for her in the future.. Generally just think more into it. Depends on the girl and the general situation, she may just not think much at all.
Plus, if she's just the kind of girl to show off when her friends are around, she might reject him just to look cool in front of her friends, if she's That girl. No guy even wants someone like that tho...
Women have definitely a problem to find partners who want more than sex. I had sex with few women who just wanted a short adventure without any obligation, but I heard always deep inside them the desire for a partner who would love them. I think many men nowadays have a problem to appear sexually attractive for women, but most women have a problem to appear psychologically and emotionally as attractive partners. In matter of finding a sex partner it's easy for girls. A man won't say no to unconditional sex if he is single. a
This chart misses the point. The thing is that women in the young adult age bracket 18-25(?) have a statistical advantage. There's plenty of guys their own age, but also 1-2 generations older that would want to date/sleep with them. Of course this results in them being more picky, I mean wouldn't you? but...
... that advantage only lasts a couple of years. Men in their 30's have similar advantages in that they are desirable to younger, same age and older (provided that they aren't unemployed, struggling etc.)
That image is just dumb. You don't see women come to men's social media to insult them that they aren't ripped enough for their taste, but you do see men coming at women's pages to complain about their boob/ass size and other stuff as if those women exist to. please every man and they failed. Men can get athletic with exercise, women don't get a hourglass body unless they were born with it or had plastic surgery. Women are judged by wearing/ not wearing makeup, if they don't have perfect doll skin, if they have body hair (even in nornal limits) if they have cellulite and many more. Women need to worry about a lot more. Yeah, you guys need to do stuff too. But stop expecting to get stuff with 0 effort. Girls have to do stuff and so are you. You are not the ones who have it hardest.
the fact so many girls voted no i think they misunderstand the question, i think they think ur asking if its harder to get a date with a guy they like or find the perfect man, but no what ur really asking here is it easier for girls to get dates... and it absolutely is... you have to be blind or ignorant to disagree with me here... guys are horny pigs and will fuck pretty much any girl.,... and girls look naturally cute asf anyway so it really isn't hard for a girl to get a date... pretty much any girl can aslong as she isn't hideous... but guys have it way harder cos guys aren't physically gifted and girls are very picky.,.. they only want handsome muscluar guys and obviously only a small percentage of guys are what girls are looking for... so naturally its harder for a guy to a get a girl intrested... but for a girl... its very easy
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0 Reply
Anonymous
(18-24)
+1 y
Somewhat... yes. If you are average looking, and not fat, reasonably intelligent and witty, someone out there will date you.
However, I do think standards do rise quite quickly, if you want to have high standards in men, quite quickly you've got to be very attractive, in good physical shape and mentally sharp.
I would say overall it's easier for women to get dates. But isn't this sort of human nature? I mean haven't studied it, but I watched a documentary about human sexual behaviours, and I think it said that most 'average' men are chasing almost all the women but the top ranked 50% of women are chasing the top 5% of males. Just because women are programmed to have high standards since it takes so much effort raise children etc and we require many thing to help. (don't attack me if my science is wrong, that's just what I read)
No I'm talking about majority of men. Biologically men are more visual and intelligent than women. So we focus more on looks and lesser on intelligence in women. Reverse is true for women since women are less visual
I do believe woman have it a bit easier, but that chart is quite stupid. Most of the points are a lie. I perfectly find attractive guys with soft jawline or negative slanted eyes, and I don't even need a guy to be tall or fit.
I would say girls have it easier because some guys (not all, thankfully), just want a girl to date (and fuck), and they don't really care who she is, as long as she's pretty.
@Rangers yeah but the same could be said for women. There are tons of women to choose from too... if you're coming up empty handed it's simply because you just may not be their type... and if that is the case women have the exact same problem too.
@Harttttt I only get to choose who I TRY to be with, I can't choose who I'll be in a relationship with because I don't have the freedom to do that, I have to prove myself amongst an endless line of guys, women don't as interested men will just come right to them.
@Rangers Just because "interested" men may flock to a person's door it doesn't mean that person gets to choose who they'll be in a relationship with. Girls aren't after every guy who shows a bit of interest in them as I would hope guys aren't either (also I'm sure there are quite a few men who will have women lining up at their door too)... and your statement about women not having to prove themselves to guys is completely whack. We have to put just as much work and effort in, in order to prove ourselves to men as well.
I've seen girls beign rejected around me enaugh to say girls can't always choose. Also, I've never had and endless line of guys. Some girls I know don't even know how's to be approached by a guy. I think you forget most girls are average and people don't pay them attention. You talk as if most girls were 7s or 8s... but no, most girls are 5s. Normal girls are rarely approached.
Honestly I'm stuck on how to vote. I get that a lot of guys assume that women have it easier but in this day and age it's really hard to speculate who has it easier.
Both sex have competition, we both have vanity issues, trying to keep up with what's hot what's not, dealing with our own personal insecurities and we all have that insane fear of rejection.
So many questions on both sides... I would say that we all have it equally balanced really.
How is it balanced? All the guys come right to the girls without them having to do anything and they get a relationship no matter what wheras the guys have only one chance and that's it.
That's because the guys choose to do that. I've had and seen many a girl approach a guy in a bar and club. And I completely disagree on having just one chance, if we all thought like that then our anxieties would be through the roof.
Yeah... So you know what it can be like but as you get older you'll see a huge difference. Besides, nothings stopping you now for not going upto a girl, let them come to you.
Really not the case buddy. Guys will always chase girls yes but there are those that stand out from the others by simply not doing that. Those are the ones that the girls chase.
Ok, honestly how do you see yourself? Say if you were to look at yourself from a third person view, what do you think you would see? Being honest here is crucial as other wise this won't work.
Right, so would you go as far to say 'mysterious'? That can be a great thing. How's your confidence in yourself? I mean, would you approach a girl you really like the look of? Go somewhere on holiday by yourself?
Mysterious, but it creates fear in people rather than curiosity. As for just looks alone? No, because it's a waste of time, it'll be too much competition. I prefer to spend holiday time with family
Ah, I wouldn't say it's a waste of time. You'll find someone that will blow your world apart and then you will never imagine life without them. Just be yourself, don't think too hard about things and enjoy your life, show people that you are enjoying your life. You will become a beacon, you'll see.
I personally would prefer a man who is not fat and has a "manly" hair cut (not those Justin Bieber hair cuts). And he must not smoke. The rest is character study.
It depends on the guy what he prefers in his date: Does he like her skinny/normal/a bit overweight? Is he okay with her wearing no/a little/a bit more makeup? Is he ok with her smoking/not smoking? Rest is character study.
Sure, there are always people who want to meet their perfect prince/princess and in the end they need to go on a lot of dates because they're so picky. But it's their loss if they want their Ken/Barbie that desperately.
Honestly? Yeah they do. And if the counter argument is "no it's hard for women cuz guys cheat/treat them bad" ... Nah. There's good dudes out there. If you choose to stay around bums, that's on you.
Easy for sex hard for commitment. They are one swipe away from sex. And they don't care how good or nice or caring the guy's personality is. They only care physically strong looking and highly masculine traits when it comes to sex. Even some women have boyfriends when they are horny go look for short term sex partner. Some women are lucky to have a guy has both but those are rare. So for women looking for those rare guys yeah it's hard. If you want to have sex with women focus on masculinity be ultra confident, masculine guy and have muscles. If you want to be boyfriends then focus on personality.
how hypocritical of the women answering this poll question. They have it so easy that they take it for granted, there were too many difficulties for guys but specially brutal for those who lack social skills, and are in the autism spectrum. with no social skills a woman will get plenty of dates. dating is easier for girls, but exponentially more difficult for guys suffering from autism and even worse for those with no help among those with autism. whatever advantages you may have such as looks athletics etc are completely overshadowed by lack of social skills.
I'm not denying anything you're saying, but it looks like you think that autistic men are rejected always because of the social skills. Actually, a lot of times they are rejected simply because they have it and it can pass down genetic mutations. To avoid using anybody else or speaking in general, I'll use myself as the example: even if the guy had amazing social skills and still had something like epilepsy or AIDS, I wouldn't want him. Could I help him with what he's going through? Certainly. But he's never going to be my date or anything higher, and especially not the man I have kids with because I don't want my children to have that abnormal DNA.
@armleg Condoms are not 100% effective, and that also takes away from the intimacy. By the way, eliminating them would be eugenics, which yes I support the idea because if we did that then guess what... Nobody could get it through genetics anymore. And that’s not just autism, it could be used for a lot of other diseases and DNA abnormalities, but of course there would be more riots because the people who suffer would be not allowed to reproduce. More and more riots... because society is stupid. It doesn’t see that there wouldn’t even be those suffering people if it was no longer passed down genetically.
@Rica_ChicaUSA well I don't like your opinion but I at least appreciate you are responding but let me inform you on the issue of huge cluelessness I perceive from you, first of all it is generally unfair that you don't consider an autistic person for the following reason. The science is not settled on this but, to be honest Autism is not so much like a disease or condition that is hereditary, there are tons of physical and mental conditions that are passed down, autism is not like a condition that is passed down but it is you could call it an error or variation that happens by chance in humans. so for the most part your offspring do not have a higher chances of inheriting the autism. also you are not gonna have kids with everyone you date
A women who finds dating hard usually complains about finding and meeting the wrong guys, a guy who finds dating hard finds zero and I mean absolutely zero women who even want to look in his direction let alone date the dude, so ya women obviously have it easier but that’s not necessarily a bad thing, I know a lot of dudes who had to work on themselves hard, as in working out everyday getting a high paying job and becoming financially stable just to meet a women while women who find it easy don’t do anything to better themselves and end up just popping out a bunch of kids at 19 and living off the government, so really I think it just motivates men to work harder on themselves while women have less motivation since guys are easy to find
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0 Reply
Anonymous
(36-45)
+1 y
Haha, that is funny. Maybe for some women but not all of us.
Try being a black female trying to find a date or a man that doesn't want to just get in your pants. Not easy at all.
Nobody wants to to be hurt by women so hence the fuck boy if I ever get with a girl my goal if to smash twice then leave there’s I see nothing else good about women besides pain
no ! we do not have it easy ! for we want to dress nicely and maybe a little sexy without getting raped , left with the check to pay and no money with us for he made the date and should pay for it in the first place or we wait for an hour and are stood up by him
women typically have a 25-40% chance to strike out.
partly due to primal urges. because men often try to mate with any or all possible women. while women often try to find the best possible mate they can. however this is not always true.
Yeah, I think they do. Look at what guys will compromise on or accept to get a woman. For example, there is no male equivalent of a BBW and look how much easier it is for any single mom to get a man than fir a single father to find a woman willing to be his girlfriend.
I think it can be easier to attract a partner definitely if you're attractive. I've never had an issue getting a boyfriend. It's harder though to make sure you're not dating someone with bad intentions or unhealthy behaviors.
If by easy you mean they get more attention and more offers, then holy shit yes. But attention isn't always what you want and a lot of offers are really unattractive.
Imagine you have a 30 minute break and you’re about to go off and quickly buy yourself something for lunch, you have several different options.. There’s a street full of fast food restaurants while the street across is full of organic health food stores..
You’re tempted to choose fast food over the healthy food, because it’s cheap and convenient.. but you want something that will satisfy your hunger as well as improve your diet.. So you go for the healthy food.
here's my analogy you're wandering in the desert for years with no food or water and then a piece of chicken comes up and says hey wanna eat me so you go sure and then it turns out they didn't want to be eaten and they call you a misogynist
9 times out of 10 the man is supposed to approach the woman. That makes it 200000000x harder for guys who have anxiety or get nervous easily. It's also seen as feminine for guys to hang around with girls they aren't going out with which makes less guys want to talk to girls making them more nervous when talking to girls
Can't speak for anyone but myself and it isn't hard to find a date, but them sticking around is another story. I'm me 100% of the time, I don't compromise myself to impress people, some men don't like it, but my current SO does.
I love how nearly 70% of men on this site say they 'have it easy'. It may be easier for women to get laid if that's what they want, but not easier to find a worthwhile boyfriend. It can actually be difficult for a woman to find a decent man, who is respectful, not sexist and worthy of settling down with.
@Optymistyk A lot of women date with a guy they don't find sexually attractive. Women have two needs. One habing wild sex with some masculine hot guy, and getting commitment from loyal, caring guy. Some guys have it both but not all women can get those. So they fuck hot ones and look for some nice caring boyfriend type of guy then.
@Mamamialetmego You really believe that's how things go? Wow who hurt you? Dude on average men cheat much more than women. Women do care about how you look and they pick their boyfriend who treat them well and give them good sex, which most guys can provide. That idea that they need a big muscular dude to satisfy them is stupid. And this coming from the big muscular dude.
@Optymistyk You where spot on before and just went downhil! Do you really agree with that nonsense? Yes women cheat, surprise surprise, so do we! More often even... You imagine that every average girl in the world is going to cheat at the first oportunity with a big douch? This isn't a novel! Most women will tell those assholes to fuck off.
@ThisIsMyOpinion well now you're putting words in my mouth
I just said if a woman doesn't find her boyfriend sexually attractive she's likely gonna break up with him at some point or cheat. I don't blame her I would break up with a girlfriend if I had no attraction towards her too. Well I wouldn't get into a relationship with her in the first place but women are different and I've learned long ago not to try to understand them
@Optymistyk I guess I projected the other guy's way of thinking into you, my bad. Still I don't imagine many girls entering a relationship with a guy they don't find sexually attractive. I mean, most of human beings don't.
@ThisIsMyOpinion they do all the time. Women are looking for sexy lovers and commited providers. They rarely can get commitment from the actually hot guys so they just have sex with them and then they look for a beta who's gonna provide them with resources and security in exchange for sex. In chimpanzees this often leads to cuckolding, an evolutionary strategy where a female Has a child with a genetically superior Alpha and tricks the Beta into thinking it's his so he would help her raise it. In humans it mostly results in cheating cuz there's anticonception avaiable. I think way more women cheat than get caught
@Optymistyk that's were we don't agree. You don't have to be a super tall, muscular macho man to satisfy for lady in bed. Girls don't need to look for sex outside of their relationship if they are satisfied. This works for guys too. A girls doesn't have to be a Victoria secret model to please her guy.
That chimpanze thing makes no sense with us. Follow me on this. Let's say a girl is cheating. How the hell will she be sure the baby is from the other guy? She is having unprotected sex with both and there no guarantee she will get pregnant the first time she doesn't use contraception not even close! And again if she gets what she needs at home no worries.
@Optymistyk Exactly. Woman can have a boyfriend or husband even those can be sexually attractive to her but she still can have multiple affairs with different hot guys. A lot of married women have affairs or at least think about other guys. Evolution made them this way. They always wanna get better deal. Either genes or resources. You can be hot boyfriend still she have capacity to cheat on you. I've read an article females both humans and chimps can have a lot of affairs while ovulating with strong males and then make them compete their sperms.
@Mamamialetmego are you one of those guys that believes that women are driven by resources and sex? So you believe men chose women just for sex? No my friend! We are all humans, we go for the person that we love that makes us feel better and cam be a partner for life. What you describe is a very small percentage of people, shitty people, not the majority not even close.
@ThisIsMyOpinion no you don't have to be a muscular matcho but you have to be hot in some way. I never really understood womens sex drive. Like women find successful or popular men sexy.
The chimpanzee mother doesn't know who is the father either. She just follows her instinct. Women don't think "oh I'm gonna cuckold this guy", they just want sex with a hot guy.
@Optymistyk its not that hard do understand =) just like guys it varies from girl to girl. We all like different things, some are more cliche like muscles, height, status etc. Simply understand that different people want different things and voilá!
That's the thing, if what she has at home satisfies her sexually why is she going to need to cheat? If she doesn't like she will break up right at the beginning of the relationship, not keep being fucked by someone she doesn't want.
@ThisIsMyOpinion yes everyone is different but still guy has to be confident, outgoing, masculine enough. Status doesn't mean just money or fame also means social skills, being social. Women can't have that dream guy has it all those guys already rare 1 - 2% so what they do they look for a guy that has enough of those traits. Guy has to be tall but not like too much if he's taller than girl it's acceptable, he has to have enough confidence and some style. He has to have somewhat okay acceptable face and okay body. And i can go on and on. But she still can be open to look for more hotter guys to bang.
@ThisIsMyOpinion nah, why do you think women push so hard for relationships with normal guys? No sex before third date/marriage and he must pay for her and he must be wealthy and caring and treat her like a princess and shit. Meanwhile they absolutely throw their tits at some guys. It's because normal guys have to prove themselves to be good providers. But a sexy guy they want for sex and they know these guys have options so they don't play games and just fuck.
@Mamamialetmego You are leaving out who he is! You can talk about all the cliche traits that women look for in a man, but we fell in love for someone's personality. Yes of course, every person, guy and girl, has a standard of how good tthose cliche traits must be in their partners. He needs to be this tall, this cute, this level of income and education, etc. But if a guy fills all the minimun requirements and has a personality that she loves, he is perfect for her! She won't go after or need anyone else. Unless she is a cheating hore, aka a small fraction of women.
@Optymistyk Dude the guy in that conversation just dodged a bullet! She is a spoiled brat so not relationship material. Many, many, MANY girls are not like that! Case and point, my wife makes more money than me! Not a lot more, but still more. And before you say "Oh he is the beta that she could get while she fucks others" well I am ripped and practice muay thai. Were do we fit on your theory? You are just lookong at bad examples and make a rule out of them. NO! The cases you describe are the exceptions my friend!
@ThisIsMyOpinion why do you think being Alpha has anything to do with how much money you earn? If you are ripped and train Muai Thai you're not a beta most likely
@Optymistyk my point is she didn't ask me to pay for everything and treat her like a princess. She didn't push me hard like you said. We just met had a good time and things happened. If a girl acts like the one from that text just walk away. Look for a better one.
@ThisIsMyOpinion no she didn't act like that because she already finds you sexy. You are a ripped Muai Thai dude, you probably have some success with women. That guy isn't ripped or sexy so she just wanted him as a provider. That's why she expected him to pay 110 euro for her. Notice she still wanted a relationship with him even though she clearly doesn't find him attractive.
@Optymistyk wrong. She didn't did that because she isn't like that. That bitch only wants his money because she is like that. Is a matter of individuals. Which one we think is more frequent is where our opinions diverge.
@ThisIsMyOpinion No you're missing the point. Look there's such a thing as the 80/20 rule Basically women are more picky when it comes to sex and they find 80% of men to be "below average", aka not sexually attractive. They only want to have sex for the sake of having sex with the top 20%. This causes an imbalance where the top 20% of men sleeps with the top 80% of women. The top 20% are the alphas. But then one day the woman wants to settle down and have someone who would help her raise her children, and also because there's a lot of pressure to have an actual boyfriend or a husband, especially since the feminine beauty is fleeting. Well they usually can't get into a relationship with the alpha because most of these girls are average. Only the top 20% of women ends up in a relationship with the top 20% of men. So what do they do now, they want commitment but all the sexy guys are taken. Well they have to settle for a "beta". They don't really want sex from a beta male, they just want someone who is actually going to be there when they need him to provide resources and security and help raise her offspring. But since they are now in a relationship with a guy they don't desire sexually they might likely end up cheating
@Optymistyk I agree with you but those numbers have no scientific proof. I believe in real world it's much more bigger than 20%. It's really narrow number. There are somewhat tall average looking little bit confident guys out there considered really hot by women. So 20% is not 20% no one in this world can quantify that number. There are online dating stats but those are not representation of real life. There are too much men than women online active so maybe that number 50% to 80% in real life. Note that also most guys or girls aren't that good looking. There are really few men women outhere really good looking.
@Optymistyk Oh I have seen that graph before. You are not the first, sadly probably not the last, to use it as an argument here. I don't believe in that women only go for 20% of men crap. Come on you really think only 20% of all men in the world have a regular sexual partner? And the other ones who have and are not the 20% elite are getting cheated on? That's a very incorrect generalisation to make.
@Mamamialetmego Then what part do you agree with him on? The part where most women settle for beta male who they don't want to have sex with? Again, come on! That beta alpha thing is stupid on it's own. What you see on TV, shows etc is not real life. Women want more than just money and resources from us! They want us for who we are! My sister, she is my sister but I know how hot she is, is at least an 8 in looks and she is going to marry a guy next year who is really fat! Like really! No he is not rich he has the same job as she does. But he is an amazing guy, super cult, very intelligent, witty, nice and helpfull. Stop with those cliche generalisations about what women want. They want and value much more than what you think.
@ThisIsMyOpinion no. Top 20% of men sleep with top 80% of women. So if you want to just get laid and you're not in the top 20% it's going to be very hard. And if you can't get laid it means girls are not sexually attracted towards you. And since girls aren't attracted towards you then the only way you're going to have sex is if you prove yourself to be a good provider. But that's not love I think.
See for yourself, grab an average guy and go to the club to pickup girls. See if he can get laid. Surely if women were attracted towards him he should be able to take one home right?
@Optymistyk So 80% of men can only have 20% of women? Women only find 20% of all men alive sexually attractive? So women only fuck an average guy in case he gives her stuff? Read it again and try to see how absurd it sounds. Women are not machines where hotness or "providing" comes in and sex comes out. It's not that linear. I know, more than one, guy that is ugly as hell, doesn't makes more money than his girlfriend and yet has a gf! How do you explain that? They don't provide nothing that she can't have on her own, they are not particularly hot and yet have amazing girls. It's because they charmed them with who they are. Charisma and personality goes a long way.
Yes the average guy can go to a club and get a one night stand. He does have to try harder then what he would have if he was a girl, but he is doing it.
@ThisIsMyOpinion he can be a provider in other ways than just money. An important part of being a provider is giving the girl security. Really the thing that makes you a provider material is being loyal to the girl and a good potential husband/father. Girls don't care about that if they're just looking to get laid. His girl probably is average at best too, like maybe 6 tops
Average guys can get laid in a nightclub. After like 20 approaches (5% success ratio is still considered good for an average guy). With an average or below average looking girl
@Optymistyk But being a good husband/father material means a lot! You are responsible, kind, have a personality that matches her, etc. That is sexy as fuck to girls! And don't fool yourself no girl will marry a guy who they don't want to fuck. Only gold diggers do that. No guy or girl wants a person not sexually compatible. Believe me she is an 8 at least.
It may take some tried, but he can. The point is that he can and he is an average guy.
I only say yes as a guy because I think my standards might be lower than those of the girls that technically meet my lowest standards. I might just be self-conscious, but I believe if I asked someone out that seemed to be in my league, I would most likely get rejected, and speaking for myself, I would be flattered if anyone at all asked me out or thought I looked good.
Women have it easier, I’m sorry but the wonders good make up and some tight clothes and heels will do. For a guy he has to be chivalrous, indicate he has money, be funny, be talkative, not show signs of horniness, be a certain height for her liking, in shape, and the list goes on and on. You know how many girls have approached me to ask me out? Zero.
No, they don't have it easy, but they do have it easier than guys. It's always harder for the party that has to sell themselves to the other in all facets of life, be it product sales, or seeking employment, or dating, or trying to get capital to start a business.
If a man goes outside and ask 10 women for a date what is the average man going to come up with?
Now the same if a woman goes out and ask 10 men for a date?
Mgtow the sexual market place. If your average, college, decent job, not crazy, average build and looks, Your the majority of men women settle for as they aim higher. Its not a pretty picture but it is a truth as old as time.
Yes, the numbers are definitely on their side. In a general sense women are usually the choosers, men are usually the beggars. Look at how many messages an average looking woman will get on a dating app vs how many a man will get. That's a reflection of offline life. You'll rarely meet a guy that's tied of being hit on by several women a day, but the opposite is true of most women.
However for the sake of a good laugh read what the women had to say. Most of them (and they’re almost all under 30) don’t seem to think they have it that easy.
They’re obviously not good leftists and are blind to their female privilege. They’re also oblivious to what they really mean. They have no trouble meeting men in a general sense, just one the fits their very extensive list of criteria.
The funny thing is if they think it’s rough now I hope they won’t have to date at my age when men can be very picky and choosy and easily date 5-10 year younger women.
Thre long and short of ot is that women have it much easier when it comes to getting first dates. They're still going to have to go through lots of chaff before they'll find any wheat, but they'll have many more tries on average than men will.
99% of the time, the woman just gives oral and the guy has to do the rest, so that's a much smaller list of skills needed, and men don't judge women as harshly on their bed "skills".
I can’t speak for other women. It’s easy for me to get a date but it doesn’t mean the guy will stay kind, not ghost me, not try to use me, etc. It doesn’t mean we will always be attracted to each other.
Women have it easier at the start being the most valuable they ever will be and every year and dick they take they lose their value. Men start with a little value and slowly increase until they are about 2x more than any woman ever was when they reach late 30s to early 40s. But many men fall off the path in their 20s and 30s or get married. So the demand is very high for high quality men. Nobody wants a mid 30s woman. They have zero value at that point so hopefully they are in a happy marriage.
Maybe I was the exception to the rule. Of course, your image doesn’t say “don’t be over 6 feet tall” or “don’t be remotely interested in guy stuff” lol.
Really, you’re just going to get all the men saying YES and all the women saying NO.
That flyer forgot to mention the following under women: 1. "Don't be shallow." 2. "Don't be conceited." 3. "Don't be superficial." 4. "Don't be self-centered."
Guys generally try hard to make the women they date happy to nurture their relationship so it can go further. I believe we have a duty to also make the guys happy as well. It's supposed to be a 2-way street. It's not all about us.
@Wolkmi: The 4 factors I mentioned should be the "creed" which the "gifted but conceited pretty woman" should practice to avoid being horrible to the guys.
Pretty young women do have it easy as far as finding a guy. That doesn’t necessarily mean she will end up being with a good guy. A lot of well intentioned women have ended up with complete shitbags through no fault of their own or just not knowing what to look for. That’s why women should be discerning and have high standards. If a man wants to complain about it then they should raise their value to get a high value woman.
Of course, why do you think men pay prostitutes, GFE, dominatrix, findommes, strippers, etc... and women get paid? But women are becoming desperate too
Absolutely not. Dating is difficult. You do not know what is going on in the other person's head "do they like me or not?" "are they just saying that to get laid?" "Are they sincere or is that a false promise"
Are you doing this because you want a perfect partner? Or for fertility reasons? There are some women are able to get pregnant in their 30s and 40s believe it or not, but yes unfortunately, with the way society is so shallow, I don't blame you on why you think like this! I think there are some truth to that only because there are a lot of shallow guys out there! I've met my fair share unfortunately!
@SueAnon84 Am I doing what? I'm not bothered by age much. I do prefer a younger girl but it's not a must. What I was saying is that girls in their twenties will get the most attention in general but I still think women get a lot of attention in their 30s.
I think it's important to find a person that fits your needs whether it's looks, personality or whatever. I'm picky because I want to find the match that I'll be with forever hopefully and I don't want that to just be with anybody.
Are you doing this = responding in this way or believing (saying) this in your answer. Sorry I wasn't more specific! But yes, you answered my question so thanks!! Good luck to you and hope you find that special someone and once that happens, she'll feel the same enough to not let you go either! ... I made the mistake of falling in love with a divorcee (that was a deal breaker for me) with a child (that was also a deal breaker for me) and I just couldn't accept it so as a result, I think I just lead him on (for almost two years!) but I don't know if I could have helped it truly because he was a charming and attractive white guy...
I'm a filipina and no I don't have a white fetish but I did grow up here in America where most of what I saw were either white, EAST Asian or an ugly Mexican that I wasn't attracted to!
@SueAnon84 Did you not know he was divorced and had a kid? Oh it sounds like you liked him and had a hard time rejecting him. That's kind of weird and tough I imagine lol. Living in America, do you notice if you tend to have any racial preference?
No they don't!!! They have to deal with a bunch of fuck boys and guys who don't want commitment. Women don't even get approached anymore because all of these guys are nervous we're going to yell at them and say they're sexually harassing us for calling us beautiful. It's such bullshit
I selected A in the poll, but it should really read "Yes, they have it EASIER"
Women do not have it easy, but generally speaking they certainly have it easier than men do. Do most of them recognize that fact? No, but it is always rare for the privileged to recognize their privilege.
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I should add that the answer is age based. After age 30, the playing field is ore level and in fat men tend to have somewhat of an advantage.
That’s just an ignorant assumption as you’re not accounting for the whole other variety of reasons people choose to be where they are. More and more people are single now and it’s not for a lack of trying. What you just suggested doesn’t even work out mathematically.
I'll be more specific, if there was a graph showing how many men vs women are single and don't want to be, I reckon the graph would be as lopsided as can possibly be in the direction you can probably guess.
You really don’t know what life is like for girls then. Most guys just want sex apparently (according to men). So, they trick girls into it to get it. So believe it or not the girls are the ones who lose out the most. I even have guy friends who understand this.
You're only looking at the looks aspect. by the way your graph is unbelievably false. Women always have to worry about their date secretly being a rapist or murder. Every guy I've ever met just says shit about hoping she's not fat or puts out. While men are victims as well it's not as common, so no, women do not have it easier.
Women have more options than men do. One reason why many women would say they have a more difficult time is because the desirable men they want are players or will not commit. Sadly for them, these desirable men are low in numbers.
It's based on what I've seen and observed. The only valid claim I've heard is that "it's hard to choose" but my argument is that it's always easier and more comfortable to be the one giving the test than the one taking the test.
I agree with the things in the chart, except the exaggeration. Lol I’m pretty sure if every male who had those conditions got a death sentence there wouldn’t be half as many left.
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this reminds me that if a guy or man has the mindset thinking that dating is unfair, that women have the better end of the stick, he gets labeled as having a victim mentality, being a whiny baby, but if a woman thinks the same way, people will comfort her mentally, emotionally
They have it a million times easier for dating and sex but that's where it ends. Women are the gatekeepers of Sex but Men are the gatekeepers of relationships.
@VIVANT I see what your saying but I think we're at odds with our reasoning.
in most cases, the Man is the decision maker as to whether or not he wants to be her man.
Men have a higher sex drive than women, especially young Men. Men are driven by sex. It's primal. Women are driven by relationships. When was the last time you heard of a guy not consenting to sex? They usually require it from the woman. That is why women are the gatekeepers of sex.
Women have a need to build a relationships. Also primal. Women need to pair bond so that they can have a child and be a adequately supported by a partner. Thus, they need to pair bond with a man.
The woman decides whether or not he gets the cookie. The man decides whether he begins a relationship or not.
If it were a marketplace, two things are for sale. Sex and relationships. The Man is the "buyer" of sex. The Woman is the "buyer" of the relationship.
When they’re younger. They hold all the cards when they’re younger and can be very selective as even average looking women have little trouble meeting and dating men. At my age it’s vice versa and men have all the balls in their court.
No they do not. Many guys a expect sex by the third date but will sift through your sexual history like Democrats will Trump's tax returns if they ever get them.
When they’re attractive/hot, they do (more so than handsome men). And they’d get much more out of it than they normally do if they decided to make the first approach more often
It depends! Since men will date down for sex and because women will only date up for sex, it is easier for women to date. However, although men date down, they don't marry down. Therefore, it is not easier for women to get married.
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