He texted me after a month of no contact?

[Anonymous]

We dated for a few months and then he pulled away and we never formerly broke up and haven't speak to each other for more than one month. Today he texted me out of the blue he simply said Hey and it took me a few hours to answer back because I didn't know what to say but didn't want to be rude so I texted back Hi. It's been five hours and no response at all. Is he playing games or what? I see him online but no text back.

[Cynicaldreamer]

Yeap, you got ghosted, and now he's back. It's like the guy below me said: you're an option.

He doesn't want to fully commit to you, yet he likes the attention you give him (or the sex if you've been intimate), so he keeps you on standby. The fact he disappeared for months, only to reappear as if nothing happened with no explanation is a huge red flag: he found or chased someone else, it didn't work out, so now he came back to you. He will continue to do that as long as you allow him to

In other words, cut him from your life. Seriously, that guy is playing with you, and probably some other women too...

[Asker]

Thank you for answering.

[vintagegirl90]

Give it some time, 5 hours is short lol, he could be genuinely busy. If it’s been days then I’d be more concerned, if he doesn’t respond then you don’t owe him a reply, it sounds like a chasing game which is annoying and no one’s got time for that. You leave it alone if it’s been days and move on, don’t reply back it will be unnecessary because then it becomes a cat and mouse game, where you waste too much energy when you could be dating someone else!

[Asker]

More than 24H later he answered. I didn't answer yet considering answering within a few hours.

[vintagegirl90]

That’s okay if it’s more than 24hrs, it’s normal, he’s human, you can’t be that demanding, it’s far too overbearing. Well that’s okay too, but hopefully you’re aren’t using that as punishment to guilt him for what happened, considering it is very minor. There are lot more bad things he could be doing other than not replying on the same day, everyone deserves space to do their own thing, just like you need it too. Maybe you should think about that? Since this is super clingy behaviour.

[MannMitAntworten]

Sounds like you became the “option”. Who ever he vanished on you with probably ended things and he was just testing to see if you were still around. You don’t need this in your life...

[Asker]

True. I wasn't sure what he was up to that's why answered not I've realized I shouldn't have answered.

[MannMitAntworten]

If it were me, I wouldn’t respond any further.

[Asker]

I probably won't answer back. In case I do I'll take the same amount of time he's taking.

[MannMitAntworten]

Be careful!

[Asker]

With what exactly?

[MannMitAntworten]

You said, “in case I do I’ll take the same amount of time he’s taking.” I am saying be careful in indulging him... because you might find yourself back together after some plausible fantastic story. Then he will do this again and you will right back to where you are today, receiving a “Hi” text.

[Asker]

I don't think we will ever get back together. I'd like to talk to him about what happened but not with the purpose of getting back together.

[MannMitAntworten]

Assuming he gives you an honest answer, I hope it provides the insight and closure you seek.

[Asker]

Even if he's honest I won't change my mind. I already gave him a chance of being honest with me a few months ago but he choose not to be honest.

[MannMitAntworten]

Like I said, I just hope it give you the insight and closure you seek. ;)

[Asker]

Thank you.

[likelyOK]

Solid advice

[garrysingh638]

may be he is seeking you as second option. Just meet each other without being insecure

[Asker]

I can't meet him when I've been stranded out of the country for more than six months lol.

[likelyOK]

If she is the second option, then you should never get that man the time of day

[Asker]

@likelyOK yea but I don't know why I feel the need to tell him he's been a jerk.

[likelyOK]

Go ahead and tell him

[likelyOK]

I don't know him but I was went through this with Devin B4 same type of situation so let me know how it pans out. The behavior is really weird and mysterious

[Asker]

Honestly men are complicated AF.

[likelyOK]

Thank you, right