Why do men just want sex from me and nothing else?

Question

Hi, I'm 30, and I have been single most of my life. I have been on a lot of Tinder dates, but they all follow the same scenario: we text for 2 weeks, go out for dinner, then during the first 5 minutes of dinner he asks whether we're having sex that night, I politely reject his offer, and then he gets mad and starts shouting at me and calling me names and tries to rape me. I dress very modestly - high necklines, long sleeves, long dresses etc. There is also another common scenario - I would be seeing my Tinder guy for 12 to 18 months, I would have met his whole family, he would tell me he loves me, but then when we finally sleep together (12 to 18 months later), he ghosts or blocks my number. So that's basically the story of how I have ended up single at 30.
I get asked out by men every single day because they tell me I'm very attractive and sexy, but 100% of those men who ask me out are married or in long term relationships. Single men want nothing to do with me if I don't drop my panties the moment I see them.
Is there anything I can do to make myself a girlfriend material not a hookup material? Or is it too late at 30? If it is too late, how can I accept the fact that I'm never going to be loved by anyone?

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

They all try to rape you? Maybe try different types of guys? lol

But also, when you start talking with a new guy, tell him immediately what you are wanting (something leading to long term) and ask him what he wants. It's never "too early" to ask that or say. And some women worry they will "scare him away", but if he's wanting the same thing you are, you aren't going to do that. But I also want to say that we would all like sex, however I do think in some cases, women make the mistake of assuming it's ALL we want, when that's not necessarily true (again, with some guys).

Cataphract · Accepted Answer

Dating apps are for hookups. Also if you dress modestly, how do you act? What do you talk about? In which field do you work? What is your lifes purpose?
Answer these questions and you will have a profile of a man you should look for. At 30 your options are limited, but there is still a chsnce of getting a guy with a similar mindset to yours, in a similar situation.

Also, i am not buying your story about a guy who was dating you for 1,5 years blocking you for shitz and giggles. You are not tellong the full story here.

WesBrewer · Answer

Well, I do not think you are hopeless at 30, you are still in your best years (in my opinion) if you no longer use dating apps and after corona starts to meet people in person that will be way better, also where the guy is from, if you date a guy from the country or a guy raised in a religious home (like Christians) then he will be prone to wanting to stay with you longer and not for sex. have a hug (>^_^)>

jasco · Answer

Cause you 1 attract these men, 2 because you have terrible taste, 3 because your on tinder and that's just a sex site to begin with, 4 if you been single most of your life then you just haven't made good life choices and more then likely there is something wrong with your personality, however on the rare chance that their isn't anything wrong with your personality, it will more then likely be the fact that again your looking on tinder instead of trying to meet people in person. At age 30 a lot of men actually do prefer older women but at the same time older men prefer younger women so good luck

slatyb · Answer

Where are you living? Where are you meeting these men? If you want to be married, then stop having sex with men who don't. If you do choose to have sex with them, then enjoy it and don't regret it.

You can ask a man about his goals in dating without demanding an engagement ring in the next two months. Stop wasting time with men who don't share your goals. If you don't know any more serious-minded men, you are fishing in the wrong pond.

Wiredone · Answer

I read your question and the description of yourself. You do sound like a beautiful woman. The first thing you have to do is get rid of tinder. Tinder is a hookup for sex site. That's all the guys want on there. I know "match" app is a real dating site. That is if you have trouble finding good guys the old fashioned way.

InferiorElegy · Answer

Because tinder is widely known for hookups, and the guys on there that actually want relationships tend to get avoided. Try picking a guy you might not normally give a chance to, maybe you'll find a really great guy. Also you're female so the chance of you ending up alone is very small unless you want to end up that way, as females always have guys swimming like sharks around them, you just have to pick the one of the guys.

JSmuve · Answer

Wait, you allegedly get asked out every single day and yet rely on Tinder for dates? Either you're only being asked out on Tinder or you're exaggerating. And if your plan is to get a successful relationship off of Tinder, good luck to you. Maybe try something else.

BeachLuvR97 · Answer

First step is to get rid of Tinder. Time to start meeting guys the old fashioned way. If you meet them by impulse, they're going to treat you on impulse.

I'm not seeing what's going on after being in a relationship, that it ends that quickly. You'll have to describe that, more.

SenseiSeptred · Answer

My lady, I just recently after 19 years ended up in a 6 pointed star relationship last year due to much of my own doing after the women found me during this pandemic. So if you want to talk a good amount, message me on here or on Facebook, but if you find me on Facebook, look for Basuwoto Septred. I most definitely know how you feel.

kkirk4442 · Answer

I'm guessing that the type of guys who want Tinder dates, are just looking for sex. If you want another kind of relationship, you probably need to look elsewhere.

Whatever919 · Answer

I dress very modestly - high necklines, long sleeves, long dresses etc. => you sound a decent women and girlfriend material. Don't give up you deserve better than these sick males. One day you will meet the right one.

Anonymous · Answer

Hmm, so you say your Tinder dates all follow the same scenario, which always ends in the guy trying to rape you. Then you go one to describe another "common scenario" in which you've been dating your Tinder guy for 12 to 18 months but haven't had sex yet. Then you say that single men want anything to do with you unless you drop your panties immediately. There are too many inconsistencies in this question to believe any of it.

genericname85 · Answer

cause that's what like 90% of men want. it has nothing to do with you.

COMMODOREII · Answer

Thats crazy. I am curious. What do you look like? How tall are you? Are you athletic? Im trying to figure out why these guys would do that. How is your personality?

bamesjond0069 · Answer

I mean you're 30 so primarily men will be interested in sex and not relationships. Id recommend a much older man. Like 15+ years. Or date wayyyyyyy down. A man who you are way out of his league because you actually aren't at least anymore. Good luck.

Paulychicago10 · Answer

Just sounds like you're going to the wrong place to find a long term relationship

Anonymous · Answer

Tinder is a fucking app. I hope you at least paid for the dinner.

Anonymous · Answer

Because it's Tinder  A known digital meat market

Anonymous · Answer

been single most of your life, how long was the longest relationship or dating experience you had?

Silvius · Answer

Maybe its about your attitude, the way you dress or speak

Anonymous · Answer

Lose Tinder... Tinder is a hook up site... try a different site.

Why do men just want sex from me and nothing else?

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