What do I do if he likes me, but I'm obviously his second choice?

[AJiJoe]

I'm kind of confused. There's this guy that I like and he likes me. The problem is, I'm his second choice. He's in love with my best friend. He can't have her though because she's dating his twin brother. What do I do? Why should I chase after someone who likes my best friend more than me? If he ever gets with me, how do I know he's not using me to try to get my best friend?

[btbc92]

Sweetheart this guy doesn't even know what love is. He just wants to use you because he doesn't love himself and doesn't want to be alone. Your his option and will always be an option, just like your best friend. He has no respect for women or himself. The truth is you cannot just like somebody like that. You are a person who has low self-esteem, no self-love and you base your worth if a guy likes you. He is only caring about himself. PERIOD. It is about sex for him and what he can gain. A man has to truly know you for YOU, Love you for YOU, somebody you already have a relationship WITH. WHY do you like this guy?

The fact that he can't even respect the girl is a reflection of who he is and you're just going to get hurt. This is your test and trial to face and only you can either pass or fail this test. To show what level and where you are at in life. Are you somebody who likes to be used and have a future determined by others' desire of you or somebody who knows her worth and is deserving of better? You can do better, sweetheart. Guys like him are not a real threat. Only if you allow that kind of man in your life will they threatening your blessings and personal happiness. Guys like that are miserable. That is what I realize. They can't get one person they get their next best option. Not worth it.

It's one thing when they are good men and they genuinely weren't interested at the time. It's another when they know you have interest and deliberately have you on the backburner. That is not even love. There is no such as falling in love anyway. Love is an action and it is a choice. If he is that fleeting, he doesn't know what love is. He doesn't even like you. That is disrespect and he only likes to take advantage of you. There are better guys out there. Tell this joker to move on. You are not his whore.

[btbc92]

Here is the thing. EVERYBODY is an option. But WHY your an option matters way more. You're his second choice because he can't get what he wants. That's all. He has no logical or rational reason to come to you. Your 16 years old. You have your life to think about and it is not with a person who is going to give you heartache.

[AJiJoe]

Thank you. I needed this. I have the same thoughts, I just needed a little bit of extra confirmation. He is extremely immature and I didn't even notice until a few days ago.

[btbc92]

Well, you learned now while you still had the chance. Listen to your gut. If it feels wrong, it probably is. I listen to my gut, the Holy Spirit, pay attention to what is going on around me. I haven't dated in my entire life. I have no desire to date anyway. But I have been through similar growing up. I know better now not to settle for less or other BS. You may have low self-esteem but your nothing like that guy. Remember that. If I can make it through HS, is still a virgin, etc, you'll make it too. :) Real men respect and honor your feelings. They don't do this. And what he is doing is beyond juvenile. It's not just immature, it is disrespectful and wicked. Sometimes people like that don't change because that is a reflection of what's in their heart.

[Anonymous]

Eeeck, that's not a fun situation. Honey, from experience I can tell you to run for your life. Really, I think you're just asking for trouble if u get with him. Love triangles are always confusing, but add in a twin brother and gurl how are you not MISERABLE? If you and him get together but then his brother and your bestie break up... well that might just lead to all sorts of problems not just between both you and him but also him and his brother. It does kinda depend on what kinda guy he is but it just sounds like he wants you because you're the next best thing.

[Iron_Man]

No one wants to be a second choice that’s like the bench quarterback the back up quarterback

[Anonymous]

You're a smart girl. Dont go with him. Find someone who likes YOU the most

[Wise4myage]

Do the same and make him your second choice.

[bullforcucks]

nah find someone else

[ItsMeItsMe1989]

Sounds like the whole gang is fucked up