When you and a girl text everyday and suddenly she loses interest, what to do?

[Anonymous]

I've been talking to this female friend for a few months, and since 2 months ago we text everyday, and every night, but i feel she lost interest because I didn't initiate or showed her in person how I feel (I'm a bit insecure and nervous)
Now after a date (which she suggested) i invited her again and she said she couldn't that day, which I said could be next one (and she sent two voice texts) saying she was tired etc
I replied it was ok, nothing wrong with saying no and showing her will
She just liked the message

[wittymilf]

Hmm, yeah this is tricky. I think if you talk to someone online for too long before meeting them you get your own image of them in your head and then when you meet.. they’re not quite the same.
Like when you read a book and you imagine the character in your head… and then you go and watch the movie and it’s frustrating because the character is the one you have in your head 🙄.

[Asker]

The thing is we have been friend for a couple of years, and we had a thing back then, now a couple years after and specially two months ago we started texting daily after a meetup and even have rented a house (with more friends) and she showed signs of liking me (head on my shoulder, sitting in my lap) and even texted after complaining she was always the one requesting me, this week we had a ice cream date she suggested and i invited her but i failed to do anything (even though it was a pleasant conversation) and after that I felt she lost interest

[wittymilf]

We chicks do need guys to take the initiative at times… but you not acting on your feelings in that one date shouldn't be enough to put her off if she was really keen.

[Asker]

Yeah, it was not only on that date, on that weekend on the rented house too ( and it was my problem when we had a thing a few years back ) but i just didn't because I get nervous you know?
I just don't understand how can someone change our stop liking someone from one day to the other
I just don't know what to do now... I'm in love with this girl but don't want to be needy or risk losing a friendship...

[wittymilf]

Tricky… but yeah you definitely don’t want to get needy right now! You don’t want to be working hard at something that she currently doesn’t want.
leave her alone, let her miss you… or not miss you.
Thrust the outcome and be ready to accept she might not be the one.
Love sucks and it hurts when it’s not equally shared … but ultimately you can recreate love with multiple people and it always just feels the same. 🤷‍♀️
Being in love always feels the same even if the person You love changes. It’s just chemistry

[Asker]

Thank you, yeah I thought the same, i respected her and said it was ok to say no, no need to explain, it was sharing you will and it's ok...
Now i feel like I should just step back and not be so willing to please and awnser her texts even though she might text me still, am I right? Even if she still texts me? Should I keep like usual or step back and don't be so responsive?

[Asker]

And if she asks if anything wrong... Should I confess my feeling to her and say i should step back because I think it's not mutual? Or don't say that?

[wittymilf]

Oh gosh, I’m sgit at navigating my own way through this let alone giving you directions 😂😂.
But don’t ignore her if she messages , you don’t want to be rude but at the same time you don’t want to in pursuit.
If she asks what’s wrong, 100% tell her. Even if it’s only for your own peace of mind.
The key to making it hurt less is to not have an expectation of how you want her to react.
The sharing is for your sanity not for her.

[Asker]

Thank you, i will
Sorry for so many questions, i appreciate it

[wittymilf]

No problem, brain chemistry is cruel 😂😂👍🏾You got this

[Chivaslover21]

Hey I am goin through the same thing as you. Everything seems fine and of sudden she goes distant and takes days to respond. I think we just have to give her space and let her be. I feel like texting everyday might have overwhelmed her especially if she has a lot going on. I know its hard but let her reach out. If she does really care about you, she will reach out to you about another date.

[RawIronhide]

So I believe the best thing you can do for yourself is let it be. They pull away. You pull away. Maybe give it time and ask to hang out again but be careful. Remember you only want her if she wants to be there.

[TheBigGuy9]

Do the opposite of what you’re doing now. You lost this one already.