yes of course. But its not just his humor and wittiness that matters. is he a man of decent character?
I have met a ton of men who are so funny, witty, spontaneous, BUT he can't admit it when he's wrong, can't take responsibility for his own mistakes. In every argument, he always has to be right (even if he is wrong and made a huge mistake). Its always my fault rather than his fault.
Personality is not the only thing that matters, compatibility also matters. I can't be married forever to someone who can't take responsibility for his own mistakes and always has to blame it on me.
I'll admit I've had relationships in the past where this has occurred frequently, most notably throughout my high school years I would date guys who I thought were funny and interesting to be around. I loved flirty guys who would playfully tease me too, it was kinda fun.
Overtime I grew out of it, my husband is hard working and still loves me in all the right ways one would expect of their spouse, he treats me right and I treat him right, we both work and pay the bills. It's the kind of mutual trust of an adult relationship I really come to enjoy now.
i was curious about how different kinds of humor affect the female mind too. For me I like spontaneous, unscripted, unfiltered, randomness. That's the only way I'll probably laugh unless its an inside joke either between us or something like only a certain fandom would understand from a show. Is that strange or weird or something? lol
but during state testing when my best friend was sitting next to me and he shouted "DICK" in a funny voice with a random face I cracked up so bad I fell on the floor rolling and got booted from class. This was back in 7th or 8th grade LOL XD
That's normally one of the things that women have been attracted to me because of, I mean I'm not bad looking and I've got a good body and all, but it's definitely been the sense of humour that has sealed the deal on many occasions. Make a women laugh and show her a fun time, it goes a long long way.
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What Girls & Guys Said
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Anonymous
(36-45)
+1 y
Not "just because" of this sense of humor. My boyfriend is quick-witted and says the most hilarious things sometimes. He can always make me laugh, but that's not the only reason I fell for him. His sense of humor is just a part of who he is. He's also smart and hard-working, family-oriented, animals love him, he's a good listener and he has a good heart. I wouldn't fall for someone funny who wasn't also all those other things.
Oh definitely and im not even sexually attracted to guys, but someone who is nice, has a great sense of humor and has a sexy voice can still work for me in other ways. It has happened before to me and it probably won't be the last time.
Just as long as they are actually nice guys in practice, not "nice" guys who buy me flowers in the beginning and then forget i exist when they want to spend time with their video games or something lmao
"Just as long as they are actually nice guys in practice, not "nice" guys who buy me flowers in the beginning and then forget i exist when they want to spend time with their video games or something lmao" Yes when I say nice guys I mean actual nice guys... what you described is not that lol.
But you do bring up a dynamic that every relationship struggles with to a certain degree, with fault on both sides. I have found that no matter what... relationships are intense in the beginning and then get more and more boring. This tends to create an illusion that a person was nice in the beginning but they are no longer nice after a while. But the truth is often that people, just get bored and those actions normalize. It is important that both people in the realize this and expect it to happen, so if one side feels like they are lacking, both can communicate and try to spice things back up. Unfortunately we live in a society that uses tv shows and movies as source material for how things go and sometimes end up putting false expectations on each other. So yea, when I say nice guys, I'm talking about caring, respecting, helpful, considerate guys. Who stay that way, regardless of if they bought flowers in the beginning and don't do so now. We will all become bored, just can't let that boredom become us.
Oof totally disagree on a lot of that. Caring, respectful, helpful and considerate guys don't just do that in the beginning and then stop once they have what they want. They work to keep it too. Now, don't get me wrong, its up to their partner to do the same for them. Yeah, the excitement wears down after a while, but I hate the idea of complacency. I didn't just stop liking the idea of getting flowers just because we have been dating 2 years. Make sense?
"Oof totally disagree on a lot of that. Caring, respectful, helpful and considerate guys don't just do that in the beginning and then stop once they have what they want. They work to keep it too. Now, don't get me wrong, its up to their partner to do the same for them. Yeah, the excitement wears down after a while, but I hate the idea of complacency. I didn't just stop liking the idea of getting flowers just because we have been dating 2 years. Make sense?"
That makes complete sense except that's not what I said. You ignored the sentence I wrote directly after that... "So yea, when I say nice guys, I'm talking about caring, respecting, helpful, considerate guys." and then I literally wrote right after that... "Who stay that way" Putting a lot of emphasis on flowers which is fine but it's a material thing aside from a personal like. For example some women obviously don't care about flowers. My point is that anything repetitive can become boring, and while you might like flowers, for the person buying it, it might become boring. And that is the point, where someone might stop buying them. This doesn't necessarily mean the person isn't nice anymore, as they could and should be offering their love in other ways. Which is why I said if something is lacking, then the partner should speak up so the one who stopped "buying the flowers" knows. I think its hilariously ironic that I mentioned how much we look to movies and shows in order to guide us and here we are talking about buying flowers. But i think so long as we both understand flowers = insert sign of love here, we are on the same page. In terms of your hating complacency ::shurgs:: that's just part of human nature. And anything that is part of our human nature we must actively try to manage if we wish it to not be the case.
Oh, well I wasn't looking for a full debate on what was basically a light hearted response, but hey, I'm game!
Teeeechnically you said who stay that way even if they don't buy flowers now and my complaint was continuing to work at it and do the things that I enjoyed in the beginning like those flowers they are no longer doing. (Remember, I still like them even if we have been dating for 2 years line?)
You are free to put emphasis anywhere you'd like, but if I tell you I want flowers and you respond back "thats just material things" and then try to tell me what I should like instead, that's not a nice guy. Whether it is boring to the person buying them shouldn't matter much. If the point is to make me happy then, I dont know, do the stuff that makes me happy, right?
If I no longer want flowers (and yes for the sake of argument we are using this in place of a token showing affection trait) then dont buy me flowers just because it always used to work.
Communication is key to avoiding the pitfalls of complacency.
Nope, I want zero debates lol. Just wanted to point out that I did say it has to stay that way. Adding "regardless of if they used to buy flowers" was an attempt to say, hey, one thing like buying flowers is a little extreme to be pinning a whole assessment of love on. Another example would be what if your fav thing was a specific "athletic" position... and the person can no longer do that, or no longer wants to. This is where the compromise comes into place. In other words, yea you might not like flowers but things change... in relation to flowers my father started hating flowers bc of the association he had with them and his mothers death. This occurred mid way through the marriage. What then? do you just dismiss his new dislike of flowers. No, you compromise. My main point is, yes more nice men... less unrealistic expectations, more communication. And for you, apparently more flowers 🤣
I think everybody has a charm that attracts the opposite sex. Just happens to be humor and wit that are my best features. And i like to think i am a very good listener
I love a funny man. But mostly, I think that lends itself towards enjoying each other’s company over time. I don’t necessarily need him to entertain the room— just that we have fun together.
1
0 Reply
Anonymous
(45 Plus)
+1 y
Yyyyyyyyeeeeesssss 🤣 I love to laugh and a good sense of humor gets me every time! Even if I’m not attracted to them per say, I would still want to be friends for sure.
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Anonymous(36-45)+1 y
+1 y
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