This situation is confusing me, can you help?

[Anonymous]

So I’m friends with this guy, I’ve known him for about 3 years. I liked him but I never made a move because I knew that he was in a Situationship with a married woman and that was way too complicated for me. I like our friendship and didn’t want to jeopardise that.

Fast forward to now, he’s actually being flirty and making known to me that he thinks both of us can be something great. We are planning on going on an actual date in a couple days. BUT, he was honest and told me that he’s kind of back with the woman. He says it’s complicated and is an on and off thing. I really don’t feel like getting involved at all.

What are your opinions?

[Adam1978]

Tell him that he needs to move on from that woman if there will ever be anything between you two. Ie he needs to remove the complication before dating. If he says he will do that for you and time says he won't. Ie you take your time and date him and see if he is dedicated to you not her.

[Asker]

Thank you for the reply! If things ever progress and we actually date, I would definitely tell him that.

The flip side is that they actually work together….. so I’ll have to REALLLY trust him that he won’t be sneaky with her. But as of now, I prefer to distance myself from this confusion.

[kyleelyn199723]

Honestly if I was in this situation, I’m not really sure if I would take him up on this offer. Those 3 years he has wasted, he could’ve built something with you instead of wasting his time. He’s sneaking around with someone married and has been doing it for years. Shows that he has a sneaky and promiscuous side.

[Asker]

Thanks for the reply!

I couldn’t agree more with you! I often think that if we ever get together he can have other sneaky links and won’t tell me. I don’t think I can trust him in a romantic relationship at the moment.

[Ninani]

Yeah, you should cancel that date and tell him why.

[Asker]

Thanks for the response!

I do plan on being honest and telling him that I’m not comfortable dating him rn.

[LegendaryIcon]

https://www.youtube.com/embed/Gp1IXkTBcls

Listen to this song. I think it fits this question

[RichSD]

He doesn't know what he wants, but it's definitely not you (enough.) Don't get involved.

[Asker]

Thank you for your insight, and I agree with you. I feel as though he doesn’t actually like me as a romantic interest, but rather I seem like a convenience to him…if that makes sense?

[RichSD]

Yea, I think you're right and you can definitely do better than that.

[Anonymous]

Girl if he can get involved and mess around with a married woman why would you get involved with him even more so if he is still involved with her

[Asker]

Foolish me thought he was finally over her, but I guess not. But I will take action now and step back. There’s a big chance that she’ll always be in his life and I don’t think I’ll be able to trust him 100%