Do you get offended by rejection? How do you deal with rejection?

Question

zeitgeist057 · Accepted Answer

I don't even quite grasp how it could be offensive to be rejected, unless someone is rude and intentionally belittling or something. But then, if they behaved like that, it would make the rejection kind of funny, since someone who acts like an asshat, rejecting a person who ISN'T an asshat, is a bit ironic.

As for dealing with rejection, I suppose I just don't put a lot of expectation or attachment on the prospect of being accepted in the first place. We're talking about romance I assume, like taking a fancy to someone and deciding you'd like to approach them with a romantic intent of getting more intimate, having a date, etc. But also in the context of say applying for a job, or making some other proposal; e. g. suggesting to your friends that you all go swimming down at the local watering hole.

In all these instances, romance included, I just ask people what they want, and if it isn't me, no big deal. I have plenty of other options on how to spend my time. There's lots of people who like me, I can find a different job if this one isn't a good fit or I'm not the right candidate, and if no one else wants to go swimming, I'm not interested in going swimming with a bunch of people who don't want to be there.

Taking that idea to the romantic approach, I also don't want to be on a date with someone who doesn't want to be on a date with me. I don't want to kiss someone who doesn't want to kiss me, and as we all should know, having sex with someone who doesn't want to have sex with you is rape, and a criminal offense, as well as just a bad thing you shouldn't do. So, as I have no intention or desire to rape anyone, or otherwise force them to do something they don't want to do, if the interest in getting more intimate isn't mutual, I'll happily go somewhere else, no offense taken.

DaveJord · Accepted Answer

No I don't get offended anymore... but I don't like it. I get over it by finding my next rejection and hoping it will end up being the one.

euniece090 · Accepted Answer

I ignore it, to be honest. I act like it didn't happen, to try to make it less awkward if I have to see the person who rejected me. If I don't have to see them, I just think about them a lot, and try to ease myself into their life even as friend. It's sort of hard for me to let go of the person, when I get rejected. I don't get offended or hold it against them, I just have a hard time accepting the rejection.

Like I usually don't see it as the end of "us," if that makes sense. I'm not like crazy outside your house with a boombox, it's more like subtle stalking. Maybe check their social media way too much or message them even when they don't reply. Kinda pathetic, but I'm working on it.

The last guy who rejected me, he tried to avoid me, and I kind of get why he did that, but I still talked to him like a regular person, when I saw him. I just hadn't processed the rejection. And one thing that stuck with me is when I was talking to him about something completely different he got all defensive and angry and said, " NO MEANS NO." He also told me in his own way that he saw me as this devoted person, which was after that interaction. I just never give up on things or people. Some people hate it other people admire this trait, about me.

silvermoon84 · Accepted Answer

Just got rejected recently, by my ex who I still have feelings for lol. But he was nice
about it, and I responded by telling him that I would always love him even if we wouldn’t be anything more than good friends. And I told him if he’s ever in my city to hit me up. If he was an asshole about it, I probably would have just said “okay have a nice life, bye” and left it at that.
How do I deal with rejection? I just get a good cry out, allow myself to hurt for a little while and then get on with my life.

aWes0MeNeSs · Answer

If it's done in a respectful way, no. It sucks, but it's part of life, and at least they had the decency to not only be honest with me, but be kind about it.

If they're a real asshole about it, I definitely think a lot less of them. I don't see it as a "what's wrong with me?" thing, but rather "what's wrong with them that they can't act like an adult?" I'm not so much offended that they didn't like me for whatever reason, but it strikes me as extremely unnecessary to be a jerk about it for no reason.

Diodoro · Answer

Wouldn't say I get offended by rejection. I've been put off by girls who think or act as if I'm trying to get with them and in reaction give me a bitchy attitude for no reason.

But legitimate rejections for when I'm trying I don't take personally. She doesn't know me and using limited information she made a decision for herself regardless of how I feel. It's not about me.

How do I deal? Not taking it personally, not relying on positive female attention for my good mood, and onto the next one. I've been with far hotter girls than any of the ones who showed disinterest and some of them warmed up to me, trying to get with me later after seeing me with other women.

Some girls are just weird. Many insecure, many have egos of their own to deal with. Me? I just want to go out and have a good time. Most see that

Tee_12 · Answer

I have never faced rejection in life but i always look for positive in every situation even when i am in crisis i try to see what lesson can i learn from it i would say rejection is protection sometimes in our head we create an illusion that having this certain things will give us happiness we fail to see the hidden dangers and consequences behind it because we are in love with the illusion of perfection in love with the idea of how things will work perfectly after we have what we are focusing on.. if certain things don't work out in favor try to make yourself understand that maybe you don't see it now but far better things are going to take place in your life in coming future

lightbulb27 · Answer

It used to feel bad. I learned they have a right to their view, I can always work on myself to be better, and everyone is different. It's not a problem, it's an opportunity or a challenge. Or you can be thankful no-ones time was wasted.

I've rejected quite a few women along the way and it was largely about me, not them.

don't take it so personally.

t-8900 · Answer

Depends on how the rejection occurred tbh. You can get rejected very rude and harshly. One girl publicly humiliated me by making a big scene around me back when I was 16. Still leaves it scars to this day tbh. Those words and how she said then cut deep and left emotional scars. You don't have to be an ass to people. But some are attention whores and will step on everybody for a spotlight.

Anonymous · Answer

I confessed to my colleague. I genuinely thought that he felt the same. It turns out he wants to be friends.

Hmm Offended… not exactly. I think for me I feel stupid. Very very stupid. I should never have invested so much time and emotions on someone before confirming if he felt the same. And I felt embarrassed because I have misinterpreted his actions as attraction (deep down I still believe there is attraction but maybe just not enough for him to want me).

How to deal with it? I took around 4 months to get over it. It was really hard and I was really sad because we used to talk a lot. But I think it is better to be rejected than to continue wasting time. Because maybe someone out there is for you.
Time will help you to get over it. Maybe you feel sad/angry/offended now. But it will eventually disappear. One day you will look back and think why did I reacted that way. Though it seems very hard now but the day will come.

foxsquirrell · Answer

Yes. I don't know how to deal with rejection. I don't think there is any way how to deal with it if you want to be honest with yourself. A rejection is something negative not positive. And negative energy can only do you harm. If you are accepted how do you deal with it? Well you feel happy. That would be the reaction. Then if you are rejected how do you deal with it? Do you tell all sorts of lies to yourself in your mind? In an effort to dodge the bitter feeling?
People might say things like you just move on, with a tone that nothing happened. No big deal. But who better than people at being dishonest? Who is better than people at wearing a mask? And to tell lies?

Hypnos0929 · Answer

Yes but it hurts less than it once did.
I used to ask "Why?" but now I honestly don't care because I've learned the answer will never be good enough and women legitimately hate that question to the point some will absolutely hate you afterward for asking. I just kinda ghost women who reject me tbh, if I've taken that step and you aren't feeling the vibe then I don't think we can/should be friends.
I don't care if she thinks that's unfair to her because I'm putting me first and if she wants to stay friends that badly then she has to make the effort to stay friends.

NetSapien · Answer

I don't get offended by it at all. I expect some rejection due to the fact that women all have certain preferences that contradict each other.

I typically thank them for their time and honesty and/or apologize if I made them uncomfortable in some way. Depends on the circumstance.

Then I go on to the next :)

TonyMetal___86 · Answer

Well it's not easy to be rejected but i'm also not offended because i know that not everyone is going to like me and i'm not the type of any girl so when someone makes a step, he must take into consideration that he might get rejected and it's something normal...

Heartache0405 · Answer

I haven't been rejected in years because I don't pursue anymore. The occasional woman comes along and now I'm the one doing the rejecting. It's a nice change

Anonymous · Answer

No, I'm not offended by rejection. I'm used to it. One man said I'm not his type and I didn't get mad. I decided I want to be friends with him so now we're friendly. I'm not going to throw a temper tantrum just because someone is not interested in me for whatever reason

Blueeyes81 · Answer

Offended, only if the woman was rude or disrespectful in her rejection.

No two rejections have ever made me feel the same. If we are already close, then I tend to take it personal. Stings a lot more. If I take a shot on a stranger then it's never a big deal. Then there are the in betweens. But out of all the range of emotions, being offended is the least likley for me to encounter.

legalboxers · Answer

rejection is my new acceptance. I roll with it. On 4 different dating sites. I see the same people on there so I dont even try. I mean shit, a girl I went to Junior High and HS with who knows me is forever *BUT* In a town where everyone knows everyone else. To spare people from getting "LOOKS" They won't date...

Belgie · Answer

No I got over being rejected a long long time ago. It's part of life. Part of the game. Not every spin is a win but some of them are. The more you play the more you'll win.

The only consistent loser is the one who never plays.

ShadezMcgee · Answer

Rejection isn't fun, but I would prefer a straight up rejection instead of a runaround or indirect one back when I was dating. It is just cowardly and disrespectful when those ones are used.

ohshee · Answer

No not really, I get embarrassed for probably about 1 minute and I walk away talking to myself LOL but other than that I get over it

Kam_Harris_Swallows · Answer

I like to ruin their lives the most entertaining way possible.

Hairylegs222 · Answer

When in a relationship, it's very difficult for me to not be upset when she doesn't want to be sexual at all with me. She rejects my kiss, touching her, etc. I never reject my partner in return, 😕 always feels unfair.

crazy8000 · Answer

Never been.
Prefer straight forward. it makes life easier.
Some seams to have problem with rejecting people and creates messed up situation when the other one doesn't really know the other one isn't interested.

genericname85 · Answer

rejection isn't offensive to me. but it makes me sad and depressed for a while. i don't "deal" with it really. it just sucks for a time after and then i'm good.

MJtheCoach · Answer

No! I’ve been rejected all my life. Doesn’t bother me anymore.
I actually like it when a hot girl says no or rejects me.

The worse feeling is when I think I have a chance with a extremely attractive girl and I do nothing. Like p###sy.

Grubhub · Answer

If a woman is intimidated by me should I take it as rejection? I’m 6”4 muscular and athletic. I had guys I tell me I look like I could knock them out easily. A girl Intimidated by me would avoid eye contact and she’ll look at me like I’m a ghost 👻

Quigly · Answer

Some people are offensive and you realize that during the rejection. You realize they aren't the person you thought they were and are sort of glad they are rejecting you.
So It's not the rejection itself that's offensive, it's the person.

PinkMichae · Answer

Not offended. Just a little self conscious. But I get over it fast.

melanieeeB · Answer

Noo I'm more happy and glad that person was just honest and didn't play games lol

razzmatazz009 · Answer

Sometimes I deal with it by just putting my chin up. Other times I drink heavily and masturbate a lot

ShaTTeredMasterpeace · Answer

I don't get offended by it. I also don't deal with it in the best ways either.

exitseven · Answer

I used to say that I handled rejection well because I had lots of practice. I do not make a joke about it anymore.

ikEVERYTHING · Answer

Just build confidence. It was the confidence I built after my last breakup that allowed me to get engaged recently after being with my fiance for a year. So, confidence it everything. So, no.

Razp_Sorbet · Answer

Nope. Rejection is a part of life. No point being offended by it. Especially if it's a person.

Better_off_here · Answer

i hate it to be honest with you i am not able to deal with it well at all.
i guess in the end i just get it out of my head and to just pretend it did not happen. i mean no reason to dwell on something negative.

Somegirl678 · Answer

no because i realize that im not gonna be everyones type, thats just the way life is

AdithyaR · Answer

I'm not sure how to deal with it. I'd have to actually approach someone and ask them out in order to get rejected. So yeah, never gonna happen.

PuNishant · Answer

Lol it's been so many times.  I get used to it now.

zagor · Answer

Not if they're polite about it. If they give you the "as if!" vibe then you feel like spitting in their face. Or at least their drink.

SenseiSeptred · Answer

By way of steel between the two of us. Whoever wins gets to set the standard for who is allowed to reject whom, and what happens afterwards.

TexasRed95 · Answer

I don't get offended but I am just more sad a while. I already don't really interact with anyone so I am just the same but more sad.

ChiPaPa · Answer

I dealt with it by taking it in stride, and eventually gave up on relationships. I haven't pursued in four years.

Lushly · Answer

It's happened so many times like asking a female to dance or jus date or even talk to so it's no surprise if I get rejected

CuriousMufuxka · Answer

I just keep going. Success is only possible through multiple defeats. Crawl, stand, walk, run, get knocked down, get the fuck back up, keep running.

InferiorElegy · Answer

I avoId situations where I can be rejected, I don't get offended from rejection, it just physically hurts and therefore I avoid it.

Vegasrunner · Answer

I'm a narcissist so I just assume something must be wrong w/ the person that rejects me.

ashish804 · Answer

not really because i know m not that smart enough that i cannot be rejected

Bklynbadboy12 · Answer

No not at all rejection is a part of life. I'm old enough to know that every body I like won't always like me back. I just move on no hard feelings

Zygum · Answer

You must be confident and courgious to face the rejectors, you avoid to meet whom you think, he is superior

Neilbud · Answer

a lot... if it wasn't ment to be, it wasn't ment to be. I never take it personal anymore.

andy530 · Answer

It really depends on the rejection. It can get me down though

ballweevil · Answer

Honestly i got rejected so many times, that is something i expect

DoYouBelieveInMagic · Answer

I just remember that it's not me, but the rejecter, who has the problem so I take it smoothly. Let go of it

Anonymous · Answer

It takes about 2 days to fully get over the rejection for me… after that I don’t care anymore lol

Anonymous · Answer

Men deal with this far more than women do and that's always been the case

dpy87 · Answer

If it was a girl I really wanted to date ya but otherwise I've learned to not take it seriously.

TheAfrikan · Answer

The moment I do understand that rejection is part of life.

Anonymous · Answer

A bit maybe as some girls enjoy rejecting men. But ultimately I feel fine as something better will come. It’s just a disappointment it wasn’t this moment

Slim57 · Answer

Nope I would rather be rejected straight up than this childish ghosting shit

The_Shadow_Dweller · Answer

I thanked her for being honest and left her there.

bean2k21 · Answer

I'm unrejectable.

CandaceSims201 · Answer

it deponds on rejected is.

jamesgoldman · Answer

No, you just carry on to the next deal

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