I personally to me would want to know about their culture cause that's a part of them I'm bringing into my life and I would like if they learn a little bit about my culture as well (and if it's for the long haul then yeah definitely). And I would you know love to learn about their culture and all the customs that there is to learn. But also that's just me.
What about their culture do you want to learn specifically? I mean he could teach me some things in his language and i’d find it entertaining in the moment but im not trying to actually learn/memorize it for more than that day
I'll be honest food will be #1 cause i love to eat 😂😅, but also language would be really cool to learn from them and can come handy when talking to people that are close to them.
For me, i’ll try food as long as it smells okay and you dont tell me what it is. Once i find out about the ingredients or a horrid smell, I refuse to try
Well it depends honey , you see it depends are you gonna be just two individuals or you will be in contact with your families
When it comes to families it's very hard for them to accept it and they will find mistakes and unlike movies people don't have the time to understand a different culture.
Sure they might have interest but to a certain extent
The problem arises in raising kids like you need to make them understand both cultures and in that process some ego night clash
You have to be very open minded a lot of patience is required in real life
I don't think it' much of a problem as most people aren't necessarily the 'traditional type', if you know what I mean, but I think you should probably try to learn about different cultures, even if your not dating someone from that culture. With the world becoming more and more globalized, having an international understanding is always a good idea. But I can't force you if you really don't want to. I'm just giving a suggestion.
Usually when you date you at least want to know more about THEM. Learning about the culture is part of it because it shaped them to be the person they are.
So while you don't need to have any interest in the culture independently of them, it's good to know how it shaped them and their worldview because it will affect your future.
I will date interracially and one time me and this girl exchanged pics through emails she responds back to me and says omg you look like one of my brothers and she was biracial and so gorgeous but I sort of got shy and didn't know what to say back to her?
With that being said if I was serious with someone I would try to learn a little about their culture. One just to show an interest and two cultures do interest me a little so I'd be lying if I didn't say I'd be at least a little curious.
Now that doesn't mean I'll follow their culture I have my own way of living and I intend to live my life the way I want to. But I would at least make the effort to learn a little about it.
Well language isn't necessarily a culture thing. My dad used to be able to speak several languages fluently including Mandarin and he's not Asian lol.
But I think it is important to learn a little about their culture because their culture could end up being something you don't want to be involved in you know? So I think it's important to at least know what you could be possibly getting yourself into.
I don't think it's wrong to not know your partner's ethnical background until both are comfortable with the fact. If your partner wants to tell you, then you should definitely listen to it.
Personally, I would date anyone I'm attracted to, religion/ethnicity doesn't matter. Also, I would ask them in detail about their background if I don't know about it, I would even try to learn their language. That's my way of showing affection & care.
Im saying, he can tell me his race. But im saying i dont care to try certain foods, films, languages just because its part of his background. Now music, yes, i love all genres of music. Religion matters to me in terms of us both believing in God. But if his family shuns me because im not the same race, culture, or religion then I’m probably not going to want to date him because he likely prioritizes his blood more than he does me. I on the other hand would prioritize my relationship over blood UNLESS its my offspring
Yes I definitely agree that if his family doesn't like you and he takes their side, he's not worth being with.
But I feel one could be more open to try out new cuisine, films, etc. Definitely not to impress his family or him. That's just my opinion cause I love to try out new stuff.
I don't know how that is possible. I mean why would you want to date someone if you didn't want to understand them better? Their culture (if they're that different) is a part of them. I don't see how it's possible to separate the two if you say you love them.
Im black but im not going to keep bringing up the fact that im black if im dating someone nonblack. I feel its not necessary unless they start saying stereotypical shit and then i’ll correct them. But a lot of the people i dated focused on just who we were and not where we came from.
Oh OK. Well I only know my upbringing. And I look at it like JFK said " we all breathe the same air, we all cherish our children's future, and we're all mortal" that makes everyone ALIKE in my eyes. I wouldn't bring up our differences. Why would I? But if they came up I wouldn't shy away from them. The only way you understand someone is by listening to them. For the longest time I didn't believe in "white privilege" because I took it personal rather than listening. I'm very close to my family. For example those are the things I look at when I meet a woman because it tells me a lot about her.
I dont even use the term white privilege. If somethings obvious, i dont see a need to call it out. People already know what the deal is. But also not all white people are high class enough to get special treatment so im not going to group them together as if its their fault they were born a certain color. Sadly, a lot of people focus too much on colorism and race and stay grouping people. Its unnecessary. Not everyone is the same hence why i dont really focus on culture either. Like not all Asians were born with a certain cultural upbringing, etc
good points. my fiance chinese, she's very American, but she understand chinese people and culture. her sister identifies as American more than chinese, some chinese are embarrassed to be chinese. everyone is different, all individuals. generalities are that. but those deep values are engrained... important to see. In "eastern" culture, "honor" is a strong attribute, as one example.
There's nothing wrong with dating outside of your race if you wish to learn about the culture or just interested in them. When I was dating and mingling outside of my race, it never was about their ethnic background. I was just interested in them. Now I mainly stick to my own race and the closest I will get to dating outside my race will probably be biracial or multiracial.
Sounds like me. I prefer same race or half of my race at this point. But i always end up dating whoever i end up relating to at the end of the day so i haven't really kept up that preference
It's not wrong, but I'm sure it can be weird, because if you just have blinders on when things around you are different, you'll probably come off as stand-offish to your significant other's family... especially if you're in a serious relationship with plans on the future.
One thing I agree with you about 100%: An attractive person is an attractive person. Period. I never met a woman that I found attractive and had my first thought be, "I wonder if she's Irish-Italian Catholic... because if she's not, I can't be interested in her." Yeah right. Or if a girl showed interest in me, never did I think, "She's not like me, so I'll pass." Again, yeah right.
I can see where you're coming from, you are dating a person not a culture.
Personally I am interested in lots of things so I'd want to know more. Baring in mind someone might not be interested in their own culture. I'm not up to date with modern culture and only have my knowledge of random stuff to provide information.
Yes i want to date a person. English-speaking to be exact but that doesn’t mean they have to be American. And that doesn't mean English has to be their first language vut they need to understand that its the only language i’ll likely want to speak to them in 99% of the time.
You are assuming they have a different culture. They could be just like you.
But for me, if I am dating interracially and interculturally, I want to know about both. And I think everyone should. Its a part of the person you are dating after all.
Im not assuming. I’m talking about the ones who make it clear as day that they have a different cultural background. I know someone in London could share a similar background to myself. Thats not exactly what i mean. Im mainly referring to those who’s first language is not English or who’s parents dont speak it.
It's not wrong. When you fall in love with someone or simply like them It's because of their character/personality. To answer your question, you don't have to love your partners entire race in order to love him/her. If he/she introduces his culture to you by practicing it obviously you'll learn. But you don't have to feel pressured to learn or be interested. It's not that deep to me🤷♀️
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I'd personally not seriously date someone if I was not willing to get to know about a background that is foreign to me.. may it be ethnicity, or social-economic differences.. I don't think I can generally understand their interests, and especially morals and beliefs if that gap is not filled. And usually people who are a minority do keep some customs and so. It is usually a part of people, not just a thing in the past.
My exes didn't make a big deal of it no matter if we were the same or different. So i guess I've gotten used to that and it surprises me when some people now seem upset if you dont ask more about it
I can't say I want to learn about the entire other culture, I do however want to learn about what is important to her in her culture and learn that, to be able to support her and understand it.
Yes but I’d change that thinking. I never thought I’d date Chinese …but doing so has brought a lot to my life that has been enrichening. I think key is the value systems align then different culture is enlightening.
I know. I’m mainly referring to the ones here. If they wanted to take me home to learn more about their background, i honestly would have no interest in going
what do you want to learn? I'm confused... you want to date interracial but have no interest in learning about who they are? whats the point of dating?
I prefer to date my own race. But i have no issue dating interracially. I’ll marry either or. I dont just date to date. But i was just wondering if people cared if their interracial partner didn't want to study their culture. I have my answer now
I like learning about where they come from for sure and care a lot about it as far as to help relate to them and their family. Depends on their culture though. A family of wickens might be a different value for getting to know about them than a family straight outta China or Japan or something.
It’s not wrong in my opinion. Besides, if you’re dating them or in a relationship with them with the intent of getting married, you’re going to be exposed to their culture regardless. And they’re going to be exposed to yours regardless as well.
I would just think that she was just another American. I would not think too much about culture unless she made it a thing. I am of Italian decent and there are some cultural things that I grew up with but I do not make a big deal about it.
This is an excellent question. You do need to understand your partner as an individual but also as part of any groups they identify with. If they’re from another country, you do need to learn At least some of their language and culture.
Yea its a lot of work i have no interest in completing. I guess i better stick to what i know. But then again, not sure why i asked this because I’ve dated men from other backgrounds and they never forced or asked me to learn their stuff. I guess thats why i haven't thought much about it. We’d seduce eachother with certain words in their language but outside of that, not much in their language. Plus their foods looked like stuff i ate anyways. Most of them were some kinda Catholic. I guess the only issue was just their family having an issue with them dating outside the culture
Some people don't care, but in the long run it causes problems if you don't, especially where the cultural differences are great, e. g., someone from East Asia dating someone from the US.
But i dated someone from East Asia before. We knew we had different religions but it never got in the way. However, he kept wanting me to try different foods and i had no interest in that. He only spoke to me in English so that wasn't a problem. I think it only wouldve been an issue in terms of what we raised the kids as
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I personally to me would want to know about their culture cause that's a part of them I'm bringing into my life and I would like if they learn a little bit about my culture as well (and if it's for the long haul then yeah definitely). And I would you know love to learn about their culture and all the customs that there is to learn. But also that's just me.
What about their culture do you want to learn specifically? I mean he could teach me some things in his language and i’d find it entertaining in the moment but im not trying to actually learn/memorize it for more than that day
I'll be honest food will be #1 cause i love to eat 😂😅, but also language would be really cool to learn from them and can come handy when talking to people that are close to them.
For me, i’ll try food as long as it smells okay and you dont tell me what it is. Once i find out about the ingredients or a horrid smell, I refuse to try
Well it depends honey , you see it depends are you gonna be just two individuals or you will be in contact with your families
When it comes to families it's very hard for them to accept it and they will find mistakes and unlike movies people don't have the time to understand a different culture.
Sure they might have interest but to a certain extent
The problem arises in raising kids like you need to make them understand both cultures and in that process some ego night clash
You have to be very open minded a lot of patience is required in real life
I don't think it' much of a problem as most people aren't necessarily the 'traditional type', if you know what I mean, but I think you should probably try to learn about different cultures, even if your not dating someone from that culture. With the world becoming more and more globalized, having an international understanding is always a good idea.
But I can't force you if you really don't want to. I'm just giving a suggestion.
Maybe if my job required it
Usually when you date you at least want to know more about THEM. Learning about the culture is part of it because it shaped them to be the person they are.
So while you don't need to have any interest in the culture independently of them, it's good to know how it shaped them and their worldview because it will affect your future.
I will date interracially and one time me and this girl exchanged pics through emails she responds back to me and says omg you look like one of my brothers and she was biracial and so gorgeous but I sort of got shy and didn't know what to say back to her?
Thats awkward if you look like her brother lmao
@DizzyDesii Yeah LMAO
I don't see an issue with it personally.
With that being said if I was serious with someone I would try to learn a little about their culture. One just to show an interest and two cultures do interest me a little so I'd be lying if I didn't say I'd be at least a little curious.
Now that doesn't mean I'll follow their culture I have my own way of living and I intend to live my life the way I want to. But I would at least make the effort to learn a little about it.
Once married i’d kinda have to, because if we have kids together, they may be speakin some shit that ain't English
Well language isn't necessarily a culture thing. My dad used to be able to speak several languages fluently including Mandarin and he's not Asian lol.
But I think it is important to learn a little about their culture because their culture could end up being something you don't want to be involved in you know? So I think it's important to at least know what you could be possibly getting yourself into.
I hear ya
I don't think it's wrong to not know your partner's ethnical background until both are comfortable with the fact.
If your partner wants to tell you, then you should definitely listen to it.
Personally, I would date anyone I'm attracted to, religion/ethnicity doesn't matter. Also, I would ask them in detail about their background if I don't know about it, I would even try to learn their language. That's my way of showing affection & care.
Im saying, he can tell me his race. But im saying i dont care to try certain foods, films, languages just because its part of his background. Now music, yes, i love all genres of music. Religion matters to me in terms of us both believing in God. But if his family shuns me because im not the same race, culture, or religion then I’m probably not going to want to date him because he likely prioritizes his blood more than he does me. I on the other hand would prioritize my relationship over blood UNLESS its my offspring
Yes I definitely agree that if his family doesn't like you and he takes their side, he's not worth being with.
But I feel one could be more open to try out new cuisine, films, etc. Definitely not to impress his family or him. That's just my opinion cause I love to try out new stuff.
Lol yea i dont like trying new stuff haha but i get it
I don't know how that is possible. I mean why would you want to date someone if you didn't want to understand them better? Their culture (if they're that different) is a part of them. I don't see how it's possible to separate the two if you say you love them.
Im black but im not going to keep bringing up the fact that im black if im dating someone nonblack. I feel its not necessary unless they start saying stereotypical shit and then i’ll correct them. But a lot of the people i dated focused on just who we were and not where we came from.
Oh OK. Well I only know my upbringing. And I look at it like JFK said " we all breathe the same air, we all cherish our children's future, and we're all mortal" that makes everyone ALIKE in my eyes. I wouldn't bring up our differences. Why would I? But if they came up I wouldn't shy away from them. The only way you understand someone is by listening to them. For the longest time I didn't believe in "white privilege" because I took it personal rather than listening. I'm very close to my family. For example those are the things I look at when I meet a woman because it tells me a lot about her.
I dont even use the term white privilege. If somethings obvious, i dont see a need to call it out. People already know what the deal is. But also not all white people are high class enough to get special treatment so im not going to group them together as if its their fault they were born a certain color. Sadly, a lot of people focus too much on colorism and race and stay grouping people. Its unnecessary. Not everyone is the same hence why i dont really focus on culture either. Like not all Asians were born with a certain cultural upbringing, etc
good points. my fiance chinese, she's very American, but she understand chinese people and culture. her sister identifies as American more than chinese, some chinese are embarrassed to be chinese. everyone is different, all individuals. generalities are that. but those deep values are engrained... important to see. In "eastern" culture, "honor" is a strong attribute, as one example.
There's nothing wrong with dating outside of your race if you wish to learn about the culture or just interested in them.
When I was dating and mingling outside of my race, it never was about their ethnic background. I was just interested in them. Now I mainly stick to my own race and the closest I will get to dating outside my race will probably be biracial or multiracial.
Sounds like me. I prefer same race or half of my race at this point. But i always end up dating whoever i end up relating to at the end of the day so i haven't really kept up that preference
Exactly. It's nice to take your time and go with the flow as long as the both of you are making pleasant progress instead of being stagnant.
It's not wrong, but I'm sure it can be weird, because if you just have blinders on when things around you are different, you'll probably come off as stand-offish to your significant other's family... especially if you're in a serious relationship with plans on the future.
Yea i definitely expect to cone across as standoffish
One thing I agree with you about 100%: An attractive person is an attractive person. Period. I never met a woman that I found attractive and had my first thought be, "I wonder if she's Irish-Italian Catholic... because if she's not, I can't be interested in her." Yeah right. Or if a girl showed interest in me, never did I think, "She's not like me, so I'll pass." Again, yeah right.
Well i do think “hes not like me, so i’ll pass.” But not in terms of appearance. More so in terms of personality and beliefs
It also depends on whether or not the people involved are serious about one another, or if they're just having a casual good time.
I can see where you're coming from, you are dating a person not a culture.
Personally I am interested in lots of things so I'd want to know more. Baring in mind someone might not be interested in their own culture. I'm not up to date with modern culture and only have my knowledge of random stuff to provide information.
Yes i want to date a person. English-speaking to be exact but that doesn’t mean they have to be American. And that doesn't mean English has to be their first language vut they need to understand that its the only language i’ll likely want to speak to them in 99% of the time.
You are assuming they have a different culture. They could be just like you.
But for me, if I am dating interracially and interculturally, I want to know about both. And I think everyone should. Its a part of the person you are dating after all.
Im not assuming. I’m talking about the ones who make it clear as day that they have a different cultural background. I know someone in London could share a similar background to myself. Thats not exactly what i mean. Im mainly referring to those who’s first language is not English or who’s parents dont speak it.
That is a helpful clarification. And I'd still be very interested in her culture
It's not wrong. When you fall in love with someone or simply like them It's because of their character/personality.
To answer your question, you don't have to love your partners entire race in order to love him/her. If he/she introduces his culture to you by practicing it obviously you'll learn. But you don't have to feel pressured to learn or be interested. It's not that deep to me🤷♀️
I'd personally not seriously date someone if I was not willing to get to know about a background that is foreign to me.. may it be ethnicity, or social-economic differences.. I don't think I can generally understand their interests, and especially morals and beliefs if that gap is not filled. And usually people who are a minority do keep some customs and so. It is usually a part of people, not just a thing in the past.
My exes didn't make a big deal of it no matter if we were the same or different. So i guess I've gotten used to that and it surprises me when some people now seem upset if you dont ask more about it
I can't say I want to learn about the entire other culture, I do however want to learn about what is important to her in her culture and learn that, to be able to support her and understand it.
Okay that makes sense
Yes but I’d change that thinking. I never thought I’d date Chinese …but doing so has brought a lot to my life that has been enrichening. I think key is the value systems align then different culture is enlightening.
I’d date someone who’s Chinese. But would i go to China? Probably not. Im not really trying to leave the usa
plenty of chinese americans in usa.
I know. I’m mainly referring to the ones here. If they wanted to take me home to learn more about their background, i honestly would have no interest in going
what do you want to learn? I'm confused... you want to date interracial but have no interest in learning about who they are? whats the point of dating?
I prefer to date my own race. But i have no issue dating interracially. I’ll marry either or. I dont just date to date. But i was just wondering if people cared if their interracial partner didn't want to study their culture. I have my answer now
I like learning about where they come from for sure and care a lot about it as far as to help relate to them and their family. Depends on their culture though. A family of wickens might be a different value for getting to know about them than a family straight outta China or Japan or something.
It’s not wrong in my opinion. Besides, if you’re dating them or in a relationship with them with the intent of getting married, you’re going to be exposed to their culture regardless. And they’re going to be exposed to yours regardless as well.
Thats so true
I would just think that she was just another American. I would not think too much about culture unless she made it a thing. I am of Italian decent and there are some cultural things that I grew up with but I do not make a big deal about it.
Yea i think thats the point im trying to get across
@DizzyDesii exactly. 😎😎😎😎
This is an excellent question. You do need to understand your partner as an individual but also as part of any groups they identify with. If they’re from another country, you do need to learn At least some of their language and culture.
Yea its a lot of work i have no interest in completing. I guess i better stick to what i know. But then again, not sure why i asked this because I’ve dated men from other backgrounds and they never forced or asked me to learn their stuff. I guess thats why i haven't thought much about it. We’d seduce eachother with certain words in their language but outside of that, not much in their language. Plus their foods looked like stuff i ate anyways. Most of them were some kinda Catholic. I guess the only issue was just their family having an issue with them dating outside the culture
Some people don't care, but in the long run it causes problems if you don't, especially where the cultural differences are great, e. g., someone from East Asia dating someone from the US.
But i dated someone from East Asia before. We knew we had different religions but it never got in the way. However, he kept wanting me to try different foods and i had no interest in that. He only spoke to me in English so that wasn't a problem. I think it only wouldve been an issue in terms of what we raised the kids as
Kids is where it gets really complex