Michael Jordan said every shot not shot is a shot missed.
Besides this let me ask… is it the failed dates and bad women or is it the lack of options? If it’s failed dates you need to accept that not all matches are good. Bad women then perhaps you need to change your appearance and how you choose your women. If it’sa lack of options then you need to market yourself better…
Let’s look at real facts. Women are not as amazing as they think they are. They have this overinflated sense of value because of simp society these days. This is a gynocentric society that cares more for women then men. Accept it and take what’s yours. Or don’t accept scraps and survive with an easy and probably lonely life. Neither are bad options.
Men are definitely dropping in quality. The top men don’t have to be amazing to be recognized and no man needs to commit to get sex… stay away from dating apps. Only the best looking chads win on tinder and other apps. It also leaves men like you feeling left out and unwanted. That’s a dark place to be and it’s now you’ll see the darkness to society… a darkness people struggle to accept and drains the kindness and quality out of people. That makes you more ugly to women dude… besides if you let the world break you you lose regardless. So man up… go to the gym… stop caring what some hoe with tits thinks of you… build yourself and fill your time with hobbies you like… then whether you find a good woman or remain single your whole life you can still be happy.
Well you should never give up... but you need to step back and do some serious self reflection on yourself and determine what it was about the choices you made with these women that you can improve upon and apply to your future decision making processes.
Chances are you looking for or attracting the wrong types of ladies... so you need to decide what if any changes you need to make about your approach and choices to achieve the best version of your self.
Lastly you can NOT blame or hold yourself accountable for their actions or inabilities. But you need to hold your self accountable for the choices and actions you took along the way that enable that type of behavior to create inequitable relationship.
Rejection, Failure and Disappointment is an ingrained part of the dating process, and to a certain degree it is required, so that we can learn from our experiences to make the right changes about ourselves that will eventually allow us to find the right type of people to date. Every failure is an opportunity to learn and improve ourselves... so do not give up ever, just get back on the horse and keep riding. Start seeking better opportunities and learn how to improve on your skills to build strong long lasting bonds. But do not make excuses for other people or take any responsibilities for their failures... its not your fault and you are not to blame.
Sometimes taking a break is neccessary! Take the time to realign your thoughts on what you want in a man, but more importantly! Focus on glowing up!! Get that education,, that job,, travel and more importantly enjoy the journey of being solo!! Will the duche bags disappear? No lol but hopefully with the time you take off, you'll be ready to handle those type of situations. Dating shouldn't be "hard" but our society has made it complicated by normalizing all that not so fun stuff like ghosting, catfishing etc. Best of luck! He's out there and so are you 🙂
Oops.. I just realized you are male lol! Still, same applies! Don't let a person discourage what you really want (long term). You got this!
lol after reading your opinion I was like "how tf she knows that this guy is gay, he didn't even mention it" until I saw your reply lol
Just say fuck it now.. you can always go back to actively searching if nothing happens naturally. Maybe you will get to be excited about meeting someone new over time. For me it is up and down with this desire.
Sometimes it is best to just be single and focusing on all the other nice things life has besides relationships :)
Opinion
39Opinion
Men:
Right now! Unless you're literally perfect, you will NEVER be good enough for modern (Western) women. Dating is a sh*tshow. And while simps certainly are to blame, women are and always have been the gatekeepers of dating. And since almost no men are good enough for them nowadays, it's best to stop trying to win a game you simply cannot win. Focus on yourself and if love is meant to happen to you, it will. If not, you won't have wasted much of your youth trying to win something that's near impossible.
Women:
Once you realize your perfect man is impossible to achieve and does not exist, therefore, you will never be satisfied. So just give up now.
Well you can think of it however you want to the think about this remember when you were two years old and you wanted to walk no matter how many times you fell down how many times did you get back up hey shithappens it's out of your control don't take it personally stand back up and walk again it is what it is is what you're telling me but it is what you make it if you make it a big deal when it's going to be a big deal say fuck it stand back up and try it again you're the only person that can do it for yourself
Just take time to invest in yourself and put dating on the back burner, dude. Work on your career, finances, hobbies, purpose and friendship. Don't focus on women and take this time to figure out what you value.
Women flock to good energy. Have good energy and set boundaries and standards for women. They break them, tell them to pound sand and let them go.
You don't need to quit dating but you should become more picky in terms of personality and lower your standards on appearance. I know the most faithful, kind women who are single because so many guys pass them up since they are not a 10. I myself am like that but still single. The biggest thing Is don't date party girls and get to know their personality. Don't be afraid to break it off if they show their toxic side.
You may be the perfect girl to some guy. Your personality already seems good, it's noticable just from this comment alone.
It's so nice when your personalities match...
Don't think he needs to lover his standards in terms of looks, thats usually something girls need to realise.
Because similarly as you said, many girls don't give the guy a chance to show how good his personality is, she might even like him after talking with him, but we know that's not how it works, especially not in online dating.
@itsjustlew Ide like to see your response to this.
Elven is right. I think the stats are 70% of dating happens on dating apps where guys not as good looking arnt given the oppturnity to show their personality. Proof? I used multiple paid dating apps for 2 years and got one date. My standards on looks arnt high at all. Don’t be a land whale and your 80% there lol. Attraction is necessary and important for both sides but guys understand that if they arnt the best no woman will look twice and if women are the worst they can still have options. Not good ones mind you but options.
Sucks man..
The dating world is awful. As someone who’s gone on maybe 15 dates last year I can say avoid the girls that play games aka shit test you. You’ll know when they start getting confusing and wishy washy.
Wait for the ones that are simple and make it clear they like and want you.
I’ve noticed the Italian woman are less complicated.
The pretty Christian girls set their bars high, so watch out for those.
Watch out for scammers in online dating
As a man I'd say stay away from apps, they will absolutely destroy your self esteem and confidence, making it nearly impossible to succeed.
Take a break or better yet, stop trying so hard. If a women want you she has much more freedom to approach and doesn't have to deal with the level of rejection and suspicion a man must deal with.
So sit back, work on yourself, your career, keep fit and don't be desperate.
Jesus! Two bad relationships and you want to give up? No! Pick yourself up and go out there. Just don't go out there looking for a girlfriend. Go out there and live your life normally. If you go out there and see every girl as a "potencial girlfriend" you will be blinded by reality and probably hurt yourself again!
Sounds bad when you say that but I wanna throw something back if ya don’t mind… how long in between dates do you go? Because many men that blindly try dating apps go a year + without a date.
Also what you described was women’s way of dating. Men have to approach because women’s really don’t. I don’t wanna hear how you do “women” as a whole do not. Sorry to cut you off on that but it’s almost as annoying as who hurt you or I’m not like that lol. Every woman’s always the exception. But honestly if men don’t look they remain alone unless their particularly attractive in some way. That’s been my experience.
While I don't agree with the way she said it. She's right about the last thing she said. Take it slower! Make sure you really vet these women before jumping head long into a "relationship" with these women. If she's a quality woman she will wait because quality women KNOW something real takes time. And if she's unwilling to be patient then she's already told you what type of woman she is. You can move on.
@VanillaSalt obviously I don't know what is like for guys but I was just trying to make him see that giving up is not the answer. Everybody has bad experiences but I believe there is always someone out there that is perfect for everyone. And I'm not saying not to look around, he just needs to make sure he takes time when he meets someone new. It's a decision he needs to make, does he wants to risk and get hurt again or does he want to take time and stay alone but without a broken heart?
@nani_BD out of curiosity how have your dates been initiated? Also for the sake of knowing are you good looking, average, less?
When it comes to guys, and I can’t speak for all just many, we have to approach and the odds of rejection are significant. Dating isn’t kind to men. Women are taught there’s plenty of fish in the sea and men are taught women are queens and should be valued. Women wait for men to approach and though that’s fading out it’s still highly unlikely, unless your a hell of a man, you’ll be approached. Sit and wait don’t work for men. We HAVE to approach or else nothing happens. When we approach women will rip your heart out more often then fill it. Personally my relationships have all been long term 3 years, 8 months, 6 years… I don’t date. But when I try… we’ll… apps arnt the answer. It’s gotta be in person unless your exceptionally good looking. Besides “does this smell like chloroform to you?” Don’t work if not in person…
Just noticed I said this all once already and I’m too lazy to change it so oh well.
You should read some red pill content to broaden your mind and try to make sense of the experiences you've had. It'll let you know where you need to put your priorities. Once you've consumed enough content, you'll understand so much but also be horribly disappointed to the point where you won't feel bad about saying "fuck it" because it'll be the best thing you could do for yourself.
never give up dating no matter what has happened with your past dating experiences never give up on dating just make sure to tell your future partner all of your past experiences so that your future partner will now that you would give up on dating but that your still open to get to know somebody.
I don't understand why people use dating apps. Try using a meeting site. Try something like meetup dot com.
Find some interest, meet with groups in your area, and then try to get to know women who have similar hobbies, etc.
It's different for everyone. I quit for so many reasons, females always telling me how ugly I am, I spent so much time, effort and money trying to date but have never been on a date, friends set me up on a blind date girl walks in looks my way and leaves. A few decades of that was enough to give up forever, I get it I'm ugly and I won't find love but now I don't really care anymore.
Stop formally going on "dates" and start just interacting with the people you're interested in. It's the natural way.
Indeed forget the online dating if you do not have quality pictures. It's a waste of mental effort.
when you fucking dieeeee!!!
Don't give up on hope ya little bitchhhh.
get tf out there and keep on meeting honeys, some will be shit but some will be great.
You're gonna get fucking destroyed, bitches gonna break your heart it's what they do. But man the fuck up and face it.
Happiness and real love is out there, keep trying, keep improving and be good to yourself!!!
you got this bruv
The interesting thing is, if you just have a 'hell with it' and give up attitude, that's when the fantastic dating choices just magically turn up for you. It takes a little time, but it happens.
I'm about to hit 10 years older than you, and you've had a better run than I have so far. I'm giving it this year then giving up on a lifetime of rejection and feeling unwanted.
Now. It's ridiculous. You don't want to waste another moment on it. If you can stay single past 35 you will thank your lucky stars. Never take dating advice from women. Good luck brother
Never. Just change your approach. it's probably flawed somehow. It's what I had to do. Plus, I live in the country, so I have to drive 1 1/2 hrs to go on a date, typically, but I do.
Optimistically you should never give up. You seem to be confident enough in yourself and that's a good sign, so I'd advice you keep trying.
(P. S- I've practically given up due to self worth issues, so do I say not as I do 😂)
Seek counseling and talk through it. You probably stayed in a relationship most people would have left. It’s a sign of poor boundaries and a poor self-image.
I have no real advice for you but I do sympathise! Single 6 years :(
I would say best is to take a years off dating or so and you'll feel better
Sorry, should have specified. I've been single for a year and a half now but probably still sound advice.
you shouldn't give up on dating if you ultimate goal it to get a good wife. it may take many, many years but there's no reason to give up.
Look. Your a child that’s hardly been alive long enough to know what commitment is. I don’t mean to be rude but you don’t yet understand what it takes to commit to something long term much less something that even with 100% of your effort for 20 years you still end up losing.
@VanillaSalt i may be a child but at least i use the correct form of *you're (: don't mean to be rude by the way
@mrsmithee lmao this made my night thanks.
Step back for awhile and do things that make you happy. Meeting a woman can be totally random.
Take a rest, get intune to God/read the bible, build yourself up, go to the gym, be groomed and get yourself established. Then date. You will surely be successful after.
I already have. Too much risk, too little reward. I'm not as young as I used to be and I'd like to spend the rest of my days in peace, with my dignity and my sanity intact.
You can always take a break and go back to it whenever you want. If you’re worried about kids, both my aunt and uncle were in their early 40’s when they had my cousin.
When necrosis sets in.
Does rigor mortus count?
That it does
Whenever you feel like it. Is pain weighing out the prize?
If you're able to, do it now. It's a very freeing feeling. Just focus on yourself and live your life the way you want to live it.
Most man do in their 30s. A bit early for you just yet.
Haha, so 5 more years
Yeah, trust me, you hit 30 and look at your options and you'll probably regret the time money and pain you endured trying to find a relationship in your 20's.
I've kind of given up by default, not choice.
But keep your options open.
You don’t give up. Maybe you should focus on yourself instead of trying to get into a relationship.
My advice might not work for you. Your advice might not work for me.
Stop doing this before your self-esteem disappears altogether!
Don't give up, just be selective with who you date!
When you're 70y old and dead
What do you mean when you say give up on dating?
Whenever you feel like you're just done.
When the costs outweigh the benefits
That’s always
@VanillaSalt looks like it
When you are unsatisfied.
I’m not giving up until I’m married.
The day before you get planted in the ground.
Never!
There’s better uses of a man’s time then chasing women.
@VanillaSalt but dating doesn't necessarily mean chasing women.
I thinking women take more out of a man’s life then they give these days. Their good in short spurts but nothing long term just to break the monotony. Women will just cheat or leave eventually or the man will and why bother? I’m on a post on here about a woman saying she’s got a great man who treats her right is a gentleman and is kind and hard working… her words… she wants to leave him because she’s not attracted to him. You just don’t comprehend the meaning of commitment anymore. And men cheat from my experience because something is offered by someone else their wife’s or gfs arnt.
@VanillaSalt I think you're generalising. The way you say "women" like all women are like that just doesn't sit well with me. Some men act like that too but we can't paint the whole gender red just because some of them don't know how to treat a women right. Relationships are more like a trial and error problem these days, if someone isn't treating you the way you want to be treated even after giving them time to change then leave. Blaming the whole gender because of a failed relationship is where the problem starts because by the time you meet a good women, you'll be stuck with a messed up mentality about women. That automatically means you would written her off as a villain, which also means you won't treat her right, ruining you're chances with a good women.
@Indoni I agree 100% however… What is the alternative? Are women teaching their girls how to treat men or are they teaching girls how to succeed? See here’s me thoughts on this. You have typical traditional women and modern women. You can’t treat traditional women like modern women because you won’t be considered a gentleman. You can’t treat modern women as traditional because in the worst case misogyny in the best case a woman who’s strong and independent just ate off you dime without any intention of pursuing a relationship. I refuse in every single way to treat a woman whom demands to be an equal and insists their strong and independent with any kind of privilege. That’s unacceptable.
Look at the state of marriage and divorce these days. 53% of marriages end in divorce and, I know you don’t like generalizing but, 90% of the time the women take half AND get the kids… whatever but they also inoculate 80% of all freaking divorces! At some point the statistics need to matter.
Idc if it’s generalizing. I’m not describing a small 10-20% of the female population here. I’m describing things like a study done on college women where 30% of them said they have gone in a date just to get food. Women can behave as disrespectfully as they want and if we respond we’re the trash. I know that both sides have their unique struggles but try and tell me that women are not the darlings of society and government.
Nobody cares about men not even women. Even if some do the number of women you have to go through to get to one good one… and they can fuck you over without any risk to themselves because the simps and the law and society cover for them and demand men man up every time women fuck up. If a man and woman has a kid and they weren’t ready the man shoulda covered up it’s never the woman.
There isn’t equality or accountability anymore for women. And until that changes it’s too risky.
Let me show you something that women can do…
https://youtu.be/1TzTCWfiRew
https://youtu.be/O5yrFOX5vh0
https://youtu.be/ZP2syWS-2M0
https://youtu.be/uH1FuhDUpiE
False accusations, using men, leading divorce, nvm all the bullshit trash talk on men every time we make a point against women… this is accountability. It’s always comes around you always pay for bad behavior and this time the behavior of a majority will effect everyone in both sides.
I say never give up.
Never.
I’ve given up
Never :)
Whenever you want to
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