Should I move in with my ex?

[Jolynnbarry20]

So me and my ex has known eachother since we have been 9. He's knows things about me I don't tell people and I know things about him he doesn't tell people. We ended up moving to different states, he moved to michigan and i movwd to kentucky, And yes we've tried the dating scene but every time we have started dating he's gotten busy and felt bad because he couldn't spend time with me and he would ask me out again once he gets enough time. Well I'm 17 and he's 18 and we have been talking about moving in together for years and he wants me to move in, ik when I do we will most likely end up dating again I'm just second guessing on if I should or not, we both still have feelings for eachother

[Wonderwhat]

He doesn't sound like he's interested in long term dating but you can try. Just ask him to take it more seriously this time. Most likely he's going to get bored after he had enough sex with you and get another girlfriend and send you back home to your parents. But I could be wrong.

[Jolynnbarry20]

Yeah we spoke on that and he said he does want one since we arnt just dating through text anymore but he knows if he does move on its perfectly fine and we will still be friends I won't be sad or upset and I'll always have somewhere to go ^^

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

You may need to take some time to talk as friends before taking that big leap to become more than friends but that is between you two there are times these things don't work out an ex is your ex for a reason always remember that one (( Hugs )) Best Wishes :)

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

Thanks for Most Helpful Guy :)

[LazerBean]

And what exactly is the purpose and endgame to that?

[Jolynnbarry20]

That I can move out._. And if it doesn't work I'll just get my own place :T I'm not slow I have a backup plan.-.

[LazerBean]

Your purpose for moving out is just to move out? Sounds pretty dang slow to me.

[Jolynnbarry20]

Unlike most, I don't feel like resting on my parents back till I'm 27 :/ my bad I want to have independence before i turn 18, it's slow to you but not to me

[Jolynnbarry20]

And my parents arnt financially stable to take care of all 4 of my siblings including me, making sure I was financially stable enough to handle if shit goes left I'm perfectly capable to handle myself enough

[LazerBean]

I'm not at all against people being financially and mentally stable. But making life unnecessarily hard, feeling instead of thinking, doing things without a purpose or endgame is not how you get there.

[Jolynnbarry20]

If I felt like I was making my life unnecessarily hard for myself I wouldn't be doing it, I'm not moving out just to move out, I'm doing it so I'm not taking money out my parents pockets to keep a roof over my head when im capable of doing it myself, if you haven't noticed, yes most teenagers do that but if I say I have a reason then there's no need to keep saying what is your reason and plan when I clearly told you what it was minding im also getting support from others to do so since I'm sorry not all people are born with daddy's money it would really help them out a lot if I did move out so that is what I'm doing if there's a problem please respond but if there isn't I respectfully ask you to not, thank you

[LazerBean]

"Daddy's money" has nothing to do with being able to use logic. I shared one of 2 bedrooms with all my siblings in a household that made less than 10k some years. If your parents can't afford you then the logical answer is to funnel some of your funds to help the whole family. Not funnel ALL your funds, plus what you can mooch off of friends, into a rental and house stuff, then entangle yourself with a person who is inevitably going to cause problems in your life. Which is why I know that when you say "I'm leaving because my parents can't afford me" I know you're either full of shit or just genuinely stupid. Your thought process is a perfect example of how poor people with relationship problems and more kids than they can handle end up raisong the next generation to have the exact same stupid problems.

[Emogirl999]

"Moving out because my parents can't afford me" I call bs, if you're parents are struggling then get a job and help support them. It sounds like you're just trying to justify making a bad decision. If you want to be a responsible adult then either start paying rent to your parents or move into your own place and pay rent, moving in with a boy at your age is one of the worst mistakes you'll ever make. @Jolynnbarry20

[Man-O-Metal]

No. Big mistake. There are so many emotions in that description that it almost gave me a heart attack. If you can, stay friends. But beyond that, don’t get emotionally involved. It’s better in the long run. Whenever I hear of this problem, the person always goes against my advice and moves in anyways. A few weeks or months later, I get a text saying they moved out and started dating someone else… big surprise

[Jolynnbarry20]

Yeah he knows I want to just stay friends at least till he can prove to me that he won't waste My time again, he knows my trust isn't there for him that's why I have a feeling of not wanting to move in

[In_Trance]

Smfh

[maximumpower]

at 17 - have you consulted a parent/guardian on this?
an ex is an ex for a reason.
consult the age of consent in your state.
if you're not hearing alarm bells, you should.

[Jolynnbarry20]

I already have, and at the age I am I have permission to move out, they know this ex's parents as close family friends and gives me full permission to leave state to go live with him if it makes me happy

[Jolynnbarry20]

And the age of consent is 16 yes I did me research and got permission

[maximumpower]

ok. then still wouldn't do it.
imho - he's looking for friends with benefits situation.
don't put yourself there unless there's REALLY something there.
if you don't know if there's something there, then there "isn't."

[Jolynnbarry20]

Yes I know and that's why I want to move in with him

[maximumpower]

does he know that?
consider cohabitation essentially same as a marriage - w/o the legal ramifications and think of the long-term "consequences" should they arise.
don't enter into the situation without being informed or without LOTS of forethought.
in for a penny...

[EaterPeter]

Do not move in with him yet. You two can stay with each other at some other place. Not his or yours. And before that do structured premarital counseling if you want thus relationship to be better than before. Try lasting app.

[Guy13]

As long as you are willing to support him

[Jolynnbarry20]

Of course, with all he's done for me it would be the least I could do

[SaartjieJane]

I wouldn’t

[Avicenna]

Sure…..,

[Anonymous]

no..