Should I move in with my ex boyfriend?

[Mysterygirl666]

We were together for 6 years. I'm still in love with him. We have been planning to move into together for years. He says He can't deal with The stress from relationships and Work at The moment. He broke up with me, says He does not know if He loves me. But yet He still wants me to move in with him. I don't understand what He Is thinking. He does not want to see other people. Could you please help me with some honest detailed answers thank you.

Updates

+1 y

Oh crap

Updates

+1 y

What if I Agreed to just be his friend. Move in with him and not ever have sex,

Can it Work?

Updates

+1 y

Less than a week ago He was happy excited and making plans.

And plans for The future 6-months to a year of Living together move to

Another state together? What The-

[confusedgirl198]

I feel I have to comment on this, I understand how hard it is to cut ties with someone you love and can not imagine life without! but it is harder to have something half way than not have it at all. To be very blunt, the reason he wants you to move in will be a combination of these two factors:

1. So he can keep an eye on you, even though he doesn't want you men do not like to see their ex's move on with someone else, he wants to keep you on a string he controls to play with as and when he chooses Been there done that and it's not fun, the torture you will put yourself through and the damage to your self esteem takes along time to heal.

2. He knows how much you care for him and he is lapping it up, he wants your full attention and you to feed his EGO, don't do it your worth more.

It took me four year of contstant torture to work this out, love is so blind. But trust me time does heal and use all this energy you waste on him on yourself and do things that make YOU happy :)

[Mysterygirl666]

Thanks I understand everything your saying.

Its funny because a less than a week ago He was

Happy and excited about us moving in together

Making plans even talking about after 6months

Of Living together we could move to another state.

Gosh.

[confusedgirl198]

my god babe I have lived this it's so awful not knowing where you stand but surely we are both worth someone that knows they want us, it's just hard to let go when someone you love rejects you in this way over and over. I'm still not over my ex but I'm getting there planned a trip for a month to clear my mind and take charge of my own life instead of being controlled and a puppet on his string...i feel for you alot, be strong girl you'll get there

[Mysterygirl666]

Aww well that's good. I have done it too, ignored him for a year,

He kept up telling me He wanted me for a hole year! After a 6year relationship?

Thank you! :)

[Mysterygirl666]

I don't disagree with one point here. Koolies

[Darkfairie17]

No, that is a VERY BAD IDEA. Living with an ex is not a good idea, especially if you still have feelings for him. He also wants to see other people. What if he brings back a girl that he is seeing? Or if a girl he is seeing calls your guy's house? That would be really awkward and it would definitely hurt you to have to face that.

Perhaps he wants to fix things but is unsure now how to approach that, its hard to say. I have had exes tell me one thing and do another. Or are just not sure what they want to do. The best thing to do is to give each other some space to work on things. This uncertainty from him is not good. He is unsure what he wants and you should probably let him figure out what that is before you choose to move in with him. Cohabitation is a big step, and requires stable relationships and people who know what they want and are committed to it. He doesn't sound like he is either of those at the moment. So its probably best to stay where you are for now.

[Mysterygirl666]

Oh thanks. :) its all true except he doesn't want to see other people. I said it was OK. He said no. He explained he doesn't want to bring girls to the house. And I'd be fine with that. It would help the friendship start and the love die. I'd be happy to let him see other girls if that's what he wants.

[question_girl]

of course not! really girl, that should not even be a question on your part. you will be making a huge mistake if you move in with him. do so only if he is willing to commit to you ..willing to be in a relationship with u. he wants to have the cake and eat it too.

i know you really feel like doing it...hoping he would agree for an official relationship but only if it worked that way in this world! girls keep on having sex with their exes hoping he would realize their value in his life. but it rarely works like this. the guy gets what he wants and you can't even blame him for using you etc because he is not even your boyfriend. so I don't think you just get in this mess. so listen to us because v are thinking with our heads...NO

[Mysterygirl666]

Nailed how I feel to a T

[Skyler123]

Not to sound rude, but you already know the answer to this question. You still have feelings for this man, if you end up living together he will without a doubt make advances onto you. Your feelings are still very strong for him, so you would most likely let him use you for sex. You know better, and you deserve better. Don't move in with him, because he already know what's going to happen, or at most TRY and make it happen. Find someone who wants to be with you physically and most important of all emotionally.

[bcbbcb1785]

I would say NO! It sounds like he's just trying to keep you around for a FWB type deal. DON"T FALL FOR IT! Guys can be such animals when it comes to women and their feelings. I'm sorry, but it all boils down to him wanting a steady (live in) f*** buddy, with no strings attached. Plus, if you're still emotionally attached, it would not be healthy for you to be around him all the time. Guys like this, give the rest of us good guys a bad name. Don't just tell him NO, tell him HELL NO! Move on with your life, quit talking to him and do you own thing. Once he sees you moving on and not needing him to be happy, he'll beg YOU to take HIM back. Unless he never had feelings for you to begin with. Just move on and cut all contact with him. Trust me, you'll be a LOT better off! Good Luck!

[Mysterygirl666]

He begged me back for a year, after a year I thought OK ill give him another chance. Been back together for another year. Guess we just don't Work don't know why I even thought we could be friends, for you're help thank you.

[eldamien]

Do not move in with him. Based on what you're saying - the back and forth, the inability to make a decision, first saying he loves you then he isn't sure - it sounds like he has problems he needs to address before he gets into a mature relationship. Stay away from him and find someone that is going to treat you with the love and respect that you should be treated with. This guy has a lot of growing up to do before he even thinks about being with someone seriously, let alone trying to move in and share finances and responsibilities.

Time to start fresh.

[Mysterygirl666]

Nailed it to a T. Cheers mate.

[Red_Arrow]

He doesn't know if he loves you. He broke up with you. He can't deal with the stress of relationships. If he thinks there were stresses before, try moving in together - NOT! And certainly do NOT move in with him and try to be just a friend! You will quickly be a FWB and soon be very unhappy. If he gets his head out of his ass and gets his act together, then you can revisit the question of moving in together. But you will condemn yourself if you try to pretend everything will work out and go ahead now.

[Mysterygirl666]

Too true

[taster]

Sorry to pile on but...hell NO!...only if you should reconcile fully would that make sense...and that is difficult...most of the time we just move on...if he wants you to live with him than he should try courting & winning u...again...IF that is possible...sorry...I know that is not what you wanted to hear ps..very hard to be friends after you have been lovers...

[Mysterygirl666]

I want him so, He knows He has me No need to court me. Should I just go along with it, in suffering for love? But act As though all I want Is friendship now. Or Is once a guy breaks up with you Is There No love left to give?

[taster]

Ur last comment tears at my heart...I did not say reconciliation NEVER hapens but the odds do grow longer...I would not act like you want friendship that is disingenuous and will not serve your needs...but you MUST NOT move in with him. If you chase him then you are DONE for sure...I am afraid that that will have to come from him...u must retain your dignity & your pride...hope that elemental psychology does its job...absence makes the heart grow fonder? Do NOT cater to his every wish!

[Mysterygirl666]

Thanks mate, that's actually really helped. I won't be stupid ill let him go.

[taster]

LOL! No Worries Mate! I wish you well! I always wanted to go to Australia: Indian Pacific, Great Barrier Reef...message me any time...i will enjoy hearing from u!

[Mysterygirl666]

Australia would love to have you

[danceinthedark89]

Update: What if I Agreed to just be his friend. Move in with him and not ever have sex,

Can it Work? 56 minutes ago

No. It won't work out and you won't be happy.

[Mysterygirl666]

Thanks hun.

[danceinthedark89]

np :) sorry if I sounded blunt but I find that friendships/relationships with ex's typically don't work out.

[Mysterygirl666]

I think I could be happy just being his friend. But I do still agree with you and not going to do it

[themastaplan]

hes looking to save money, if you move in it will basically be like you're in a relationship. don't do it IMO

[Mysterygirl666]

We are on and off like taps but this will save me money too.

[themastaplan]

is saving money worth the drama...youre "on and off" ... its bad news

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

F*** no, that's gonna end bad. He wants you to move in just so he can have an easy f*** without any relationship, or so it would usually seem. Avoid him

[Mysterygirl666]

I see what you mean.

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

Ya, I honestly wouldn't move in at all.

[playa_pan]

Nope, you'll get f-ed over through a hook up, rape, or both

[Mysterygirl666]

Hmmmm that's a good reason.

[kimberlymyra]

Worst idea I've ever heard it's almost a stupid question. Are you kidding?! You're actually debating on living with your ex who doesn't really care for you? Yea, no problem at all.

[Mysterygirl666]

Stranger things have happend.

Most advice has really helped.

So I don't think it was a stupid question.

Thats what The site Is here for

[kimberlymyra]

You stil love him, he doesn't love you... it's asking for trouble = stupid question. I'm sure you know it's wrong but trying to prove to us and yourself you can make it work when it just won't. Don't want you to get hurt and this will 100% end up hurting you more than helping. Sorry if it was blunt but you need to realize how ridiculous this is and to not even question it. You seem like a good person, don't let this ruin your life.

[Mysterygirl666]

I didn't ask for your Opinion. I asked for advice.

I don't need to prove anything. Beacuse, I know it wouldn't Work.

I need to talk about it. But yeah... Thank, you...

[kimberlymyra]

Advice comes from our opinions of the situation and my opinion is it won't work and move on. If you already know this, I don't know what you're looking for since you have the answer. I'm glad everyone agrees with me. You ask if it can work by being friends and not having sex? Surely you can't actually think that is possible, or else I'd worry about your intelligence. Don't ask for advice if you can't handle the reality of your situation. Don't ignore the truth.

[Mysterygirl666]

Sorry opinions and advice have a fine line. Please stop giving your opinions without any real advice.

That's cruel. Please move on now. Or get a dictionary define the two please

[Mysterygirl666]

Dont worry about what I've said just a bit angry. Really thank you. That kind of helped too :\

[foolycooly1001]

I say no.

[Mysterygirl666]

Thank you all, but damn it.

[playa_pan]

no

[MahJaY]

Hell no.