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Why do you think people tend to stick to their own race/ethnicity usually when dating, mating or finding someone "special"? (Page 2)
Anonymous
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For me personally it’s all about character not looks. So skin color doesn’t matter to me; I just haven’t had the luck of finding someone outside of my race that I connect with on a deep level. I would never rule it out though
Who are these people saying it is "hidden racism?" Absolutely absurd. Many people date within their race for the same reason why religion has elements of segregation, etc. Not always a bad thing. Human condition tends to operate within it's own commonality and environment.
Married myself outside of my race, by the way. And I have no issue with the overwhelmingly majority of the world marrying within it's own race. Actually, scratch that. I don't care who marries who.
I live in a state that's 95% white. I mean, It's just exposure to most i think. I'm actually probably more attracted to black women. But my interactions with black women have been more positive than my I traction with white women.
I guess I'm just trying to say we're a product of our environment and experiences. If you have more interactions with your own race, you're probably going to feel more comfortable with your own race.
I cannot speak on behalf of others in my case I'm mixed raced myself and always dated people outside of my ethnicity but I've always lived in places where there was lots of diversity and people from different ethnicities, religions and backgrounds. Those who stick to their own ethnicity maybe never been exposed to other cultures or maybe is just their preference and they prefer to date someone from the same nationality or ethnicity.
It can be something as simple as diet, I have stopped drinking milk because my partner was lactose intolerant, you may find other cultures could create greater and more absurd compromises. But truthfully, language barriers, personality traits, it's easy to understand and relate to a partner who you share many similarities with.
Similarities fine. But I was talking more about race. You can have all those things you listed, but just with a person of a different race/ethnic background.
I think people should date who they like, I have stepped outside my racial boundaries and it didn't work, so I don't invest much energy in ladies that are not similar to me, race, politics, music tastes, food preferences.
I did too. The closest I got to having a husband was with a white guy.
And just because in your experience it didn't work, doesn't mean it is going to be the same story with a different person. Two people of the same race can have VERY different personalities. We're not cars (objects) that don't have our own mind, we are people. I hope you get what I am saying.
Unfortunately the older you get it becomes harder to bridge the complexities of relationships. It might sound like a cop out, but I don't have the same kind of social life I had twenty years ago. It's ten times more complicated.
I've come to the conclusion this "racism" narrative thats been pushed the past 8 years or so is predominantly a woman's narrative.
Ask yourself why all the gamers hang out with each other. And why all sports players are seen with each other. Or why any people with similar traits of any kind hang out.
Rather than going on some esoteric, and judgmental "racist" rhetoric.
Those things you listed (cooking, surfing, baking, video games, etc.) can all be controlled. Race/ethnic background, you cannot. Also, you can like more than one thing at a time. You can go to chess club, math club, gun club all in the same month/ week/ lifetime if you want to! Do you get the frustration? ! I wasn't being judgmental. It's actually the racist/closed minded folks that are judgmental of others before really getting to know them on a personal level!
@Asker
Did you bother asking yourself those questions I posed?
Did you understand what "similar traits of any kind" meant?
And yes, calling people racist because they're not doing what they want is judgmental. you're literally calling people racist, without knowing them on a personal level.
This is too low IQ for me. Have fun by yourself.
It's NOT low-IQ. You just don't like being set straight. Get off your high horse lol. Be more open minded. It will do you good in your life.
Questioning the way things are ISN'T bad!
I prefer to date with my own race. There isn’t any specific reason I can mention but I desire it unconsciously. At the next step, I can go with people similar to me (face, skin color, height …)
I think I can’t be with some one who’s Chinese Japanese generally east Asia also with black people, …
What race are you?
It's a combination of that and exposure. In certain areas there aren't a lot of people outside your own race. A smaller pool of people of a different race means a limited likliehood of a shared attraction between you and a person of the other race. In contrast a larger number of your own race increases the likliehood that you will find mutual attraction
My first T. V. crush as an Asian (Filipina) woman was with a caucasian guy/white guy named Josh Server from All That.
First real crush was a white dude (skater boi) named Danny in junior high.
There were Asians in my school but I didn't find them attractive. In fact one was a VERY annoying kid named Brian who always harrassed me to go on a date with him! It was so annoying. If I had the guts and wasn't a shy kid, I would have reported him straight to the principal or vice principal to leave me the heck alone! There was NO WAY I was going to be attracted to a chinky eyed, fat kid with rude manners!
No, but for me it feels more genuine and meaningful to be with someone of your own race.
You love who you love regardless of their skin color and background. For me, I can only love a black woman or a woman that's bi racial/multi racial that's mixed with black.
Unfortunately people are racist? No, fortunately. Dating within your own race is a safer bet as you will have more in common. For super weird people who have little in common with their race it makes more sense to try a different one, but it will require more travel to meet in the middle.
I’d date any race before people start bashing me here >.> your own is generally safer tho
How weird is your answer no offense. If you are Asian, you can be Vietnamese, Cambodian, Chinese, Filipino, Japanese, and you would have not only a cultural difference, but a language one too! Same thing for White people so I don't think I agree. It's not safer. What? Are we living in the Middle Ages or Neolithic days? Lol, safer.
Safer as in better chance of a strong long term relationship. There are many subtle differences between races and cultures and matching both is the safest bet
Family is family anyone can have a family pretty much as long as they reproduce. I could NEVER understand a Chinese person if I was Vietnamese and I didn't learn the language. I really don't think you get it. And it's not SUBTLE differences! The way one culture does things could be in total contrast to how another culture does their traditions and American culture can cross ALL boundaries of race. Anyone can enjoy a burger and fries regardless of race! ANYONE (if young enough and fertile enough) can reproduce! ANYONE can experience LOVE if they want to regardless of their ethnicity. I've seen a Filipina woman marry a white dude many times that I've lost count!
The ability to enjoy a burger and fries is not what ruins multi ethnic relationships. More like what religion the kid will be, how they will be raised, that kind of stuff
Two people of different ethnicities can be of the same religion. American is American. A Chinese person can enjoy reality TV same as a black or white person. Lastly, a bad parent is a bad parent, whether you're Mexican or Moroccan! Get it? I hope so. =)
Culture and ethnicity are connected, believe whatever you want
Whites are 87 different cultures and languages too.
Yes even one friend her husband was Italian and she's English/french and her mother in law expected her to learn Italian!
Lol YOU believe what you want... even though it is FALSE!
By the way, my cousin, A filipino is actually getting married to a WHITE woman so that's great news!
Traditions, religion, where they live, what their parents brought them up to believe. Who knows. It is a bit strange. I wouldn't care what race
Thanks. I knew it. So sad that they care so much like that it's not like their parents are going to be the ones living and mating with their spouses lol. Glad you don't consider race yourself when dating and finding a partner. That's matured of you.
Thank you I always try to think outside the box. I was never the sheep type either. I educate myself and learn from experience. Wish more people would too, instead following herds.
I would guess people just feel comfortable dating people who share the same culture. And of course racism comes into play, even if the couple has no racist feeling, their families might, which would make it hard to want to stick around to say the least.
Like I said, people need to start behaving more maturedly and actually CARE about their child enough to just want them to be happy! Dating pressure is NEVER good!
If I was in love with a black dude and my family disapproved of it, I think that would be the last time I would talk to them (or at least lessen my contact with them)! People need to have stronger will and stronger minds! The person in question is the one that is going to be marrying and having a family with the other person, not the family!
Many times its not race its the amazing personality of the guy, that he's into music and sports like I am.
Another important thing is their upbringing and where they grew up. My last relationship he grew up in a dysfunctional liberal home and I grew up in a Catholic Conservative home. The culture where he lives now men rarely marry and its all one night stands or sex by the 3rd date. I never even realized it as I had moved to that city. Where I am from people still have relationships and marry.
It's nature, your preference will be similar to your own genetics, since that was appealing to your parents and grandparents and so on. It's not racism.
Slavery was popular during my parents and grandparent's time. Did that ever make it right?
You are not your parents!
What a retarded statement. Slavery still exist, it just changes form. Anyone living on small margins today is basically a slave, because they have no options. You don't have ownership but you still have people with the same force and control over peoples lives. If you don't have freedom you are a slave. This is a completely different topic. For the original topic, You can try to ignore your biology but you will find that you will have little success in doing so, and even if you do you will find that majority does follow it and that is what the statistics will show.
Thanks for the insult, it was NOT a retarded statement. I get what you mean in a sense that the less money you have, the less opportunities, but THAT IS NOT SLAVERY! It's POVERTY. Capitalism exists for a reason (most likely greed). But also, poverty is something one can get out of if they work hard enough. Sure, it's going to be a struggle, especially if your generation before you was involved in that stuff, but still. People have fought HARD tooth and nail/blood, sweat and tears to abolish slavery and to have women gain the right to vote, to have a divorce, or an abortion, the list goes on! THIS includes the right to marry whoever you want regardless of race!
My biology, especially when I hit puberty through probably at least my mid 30's, was to have sex and reproduce! It didn't discriminate on WHO I had it with! Hence, I have been with Filipino, Half Filipino, WHITE, Latino! The only "race" I wasn't able to be with (because I was with my WHITE BOYFRIEND for almost two years!) was Black! Next to that probably a Persian guy but my point is biology doesn't discriminate based on race! People do!
It's was as an reply to my statement. It was completely unrelated. Why bring up slavery. And no there is people in poverty that can't work hard to get out of it. You are naive if you think there is a way out for everyone in every situation. Many have been trapped in a rigged system that they cannot get out.
There’s not really one reason.
sometimes it’s the demographic of your area or who you just happen to click with, sometimes it is cultural, other times it’s just your personal tastes.
none of those reasons are wrong.
>>other times it’s just your personal tastes.<<
To a person experiencing unrequited love, (infatuation or unrequited crush) it is!
Just my 0.02
It's hard to say your own race because there is so much of mixing the races is there really a pure race anymore in a thousand years there may be no race anymore but the human race we would mixed the races all up by then
I date women of other races and married a woman of another race. I disagree with your statement
People tend to date people similar to them - not just racially, but financially, education level, IQ, religion, and so much more. It's not really about race, it's about similarity!
IQ? How so?
You forgot physical attraction which plays major role in dating. Can you marry or being in relationship with someone without being attracted to him?
@TwiNshichamp1 Of course not! But chances are, you'll marry similar someone who's roughly equal in attractiveness (this isn't always true, of course).
@Birdlegs High intelligence people rarely marry low intelligence people, and vice versa.
How would someone judge it outside of just being in the same location?
You mean she won't be attractive as I am?
@TwiNshichamp1 She'll probably be right in your ballpark :)
Damn I don't understand, can you elaborate more for mee please?
@TwiNshichamp1 If you're a 6 (on a scale of 1-10 in attractiveness) you will PROBABLY end up marrying someone between 4 and 8. A 2 rarely ends up with a 10, if you get what I mean.
Okay I now understand. I don't know where I am in the scale 😂 so probably I will end with 8.
It's not racism to me (unless they're really racist) but I guess it's more cause they just understand each others views and culture
that's personally exactly the reason why I would never ever date someone who is from my ethnicity, cause I don't support most of the culture and distance myself from it and I know how most turkish men are and it's just not my cup of tea
People with different races can grow up in the same culture. For example, the American culture!
I think it's convenience. Although many of us may live in western societies, we are still active and drawn to our cultures, so we may date someone from our communities or even date someone that understands our culture.
I wanted to change that habit in my family, i met a girl from an other country fell in love deeply (or that's what i thought) but even our definition of love was different, and she just left for someone else, but fuck it, life never stop, so the lesson is find someone close to you, love is just words nowadays