Do you believe Men & women can't be friends as they might fall for each other or something?

Question

My boyfriend does not like the idea of me hanging out with the opposite sex alone.

Before I met him I have several male friends. I visit them and spend time with them cause I prefer male company to females most times maybe because of my line of work in tech, I don't know.

But since I said yes to him, I feel restricted. He just won't allow it... which was why I lied to him (if you saw my previous post about how we almost fell apart.) I love him a lot but this aspect of "men and women can't be friends." What do you think, guys? Do you share similar opinion?

Oigit · Accepted Answer

It can sometimes can cause this weird dynamic with friends of the other sex. Like you are friends with them for a long time. But the moment they find out you are seeing someone this friend tries to be more then friends with you. So it can put you in a situation where you might have to choose your SO and lose a friend or the opposite.

I wouldn't be opposed with my SO being friends with other guys. But I'll be honest and say that if I start feeling like the third wheel in my own relationship due to her guy friend trying to butt in, I flat out tell her it's time to choose between us. Because I'm not going to compete with her friend.

Prof_Don · Accepted Answer

As a guy who has many female friends, I totally understand your issue! I've had the same issue in other relationships as well!

This is why now, in my current relationship (currently engaged), I made sure to introduce her to my female friends as early as possible, be open with having close female friends,

and I even go as far as to mention what dealbreakers each female friend has to demonstrate why I never dated or hooked up with said female friend.

Doing all of the above with your boyfriend, will help ease his mind.

Smoke-n-Growls · Accepted Answer

No, that's controlling and insecure bullshit and I'd leave anyone who told me I can't keep my friendships.

My friends are my chosen family. I've spent my life building these relationships. A partner doesn't get to cut me off from them - besides, I'm bi, so what're they gonna do? Isolate me? Fuck that.

My best friend is a man, one of my closest female friends is a fellow bi, and I'm always going to share a close and special bond with them.

If my partner can't understand the value of friendships, and can't trust me to respect our relationship, then they're not my partner.

Bratsondanielle · Accepted Answer

I understand your boyfriend. Kinda doubt my husband would like me to hang out with dudes

Chazmatazz269 · Answer

It doesn’t matter what’s generally true. It only matters what’s true for you. He’s already been hurt by one cheater. While it’s not necessarily fair for him to hold the sins of his ex against you, particularly if you’ve never cheated, it’s also not fair to challenge his insecurities unnecessarily. If you can’t be happy only seeing your guy friends when he’s around, you’ll have to consider if his conditions are a deal breaker or not. I would also caution you about his behavior outside of your view. A lot of cheaters project their bad behavior on their partners, and it can appear as jealousy or insecurity.

petitedollbabee · Answer

No, men and women can have platonic friendship, it is possible. My best friend is a guy and we’ve had a platonic friendship for about 4 years now. There have been instances where I’ve had guy friends who’ve fallen for me and then become sour when I say I’m not interested, and unfortunately that can happen often, but every now and then I make a new guy friend who understands that I’m not interested in them romantically, and they’re happy to just be friends.

loveslongnails · Answer

So because his "ex" cheated on him, YOU have to bear the consequences of his insecurity? How can you be friends with someone and only see them when you're chaperoned? LOL I'm guessing he's around your age, somewhere in his thirties?

Well, this is your decision alone... to tolerate and accept this restriction, or not.

To answer your question, no - I believe, and KNOW for a fact, that men and women CAN be friends without falling for each other. I have many female friends and my S. O. isn't threatened by any one of them, even the sexy ones. But your boyfriend obviously has an issue, and you will either live with it or lie your way around it.

ChrisMaster69 · Answer

Of course they can just be friends.

im close friends with girls i went to school with, never wanted or tried for sex, they are friends.

most of my friends are girls, straight, bisexual and lesbian.

again never thought of sex with them, as they are friends and I value friendship.

Trust and respect are real things, some people have it and understand it, some don’t….

WilliamPamer446 · Answer

I believe they can be friends but there's always the horny bastard in us guys and there's always hormones in girls to and there's always that natural romantic interest that can form between member of the opposite sex. So i'd say, no I dont agree with that, and yes we can just be friends, but id say the chance for romantic and/or sexual interest is always there potentially.

Screenwriter · Answer

No. Men and women can be friends. However, some people are jealous and suspicious.

Your boyfriend has no right to tell you who you can have as friends. You should find another boyfriend. This won't work.

Jaguarsxr051 · Answer

For woman it's back up plan you can deal with male friend at work place only other than that it's a lie in normal circumstances sometimes it could happen like if one of your child hood male friend have serious problem and asks you for help then you can be there for Short period but hanging out and visiting males under friendships name that's BS it's back up plan aka plan B

shaysh87 · Answer

I think that men find it more impossible to be friends with a girl than for girls to be friends with a guy. Men are much more sexual than women.

-Asca- · Answer

Your boyfriend is toxic and controlling because he‘s insecure and afraid of being hurt again but yes men and women can definitely be friends. I have always had female friends, have never fallen for any of them and how is that even supposed to work? Am I gonna fall for all of them at once or what? Of course it can happen and of course it‘s possible that one cheats but you don‘t need male friends to cheat and usually there‘s no issue with opposite sex friends.

WhitneySnow · Answer

No. I don’t feel that way. I have plenty of guy friends and I don’t like them that way.

SiberFox · Answer

You're still looking for a reason to leave, the question now is do you respect him enough to acquiesce to his demands or is your need to have male attention outside of your husbands more important?

Smashingdoozy · Answer

They definitely can be friends. Guys who think they can't be have been raised to see women only as a means for sexual pleasure.

Kaamraj · Answer

Men should not be friends with women unless and until it's exceptional circumstance. Men do not benefit from being friends with a woman generally, it's the woman that benefits.

Aerissa_Jade · Answer

Its possible to fall for a friend, but it is also possible to never think of them that way and never fall.

Bklynbadboy12 · Answer

They can be friends as long as there is no mutual attraction. If it is they'll definitely end up having sex at some point

monkeynutts · Answer

Obsessive behaviour is not attractive. You are probably not going to be together for ever, why, because your asking this question, why because it is a real problem.

Crankor · Answer

It's less about falling for each other and more about one or the other randomly flirting with the other and instead of shutting it down, it escalates into things much more involved

Dinosaursandanime65 · Answer

I declare the YouTuber Ragg Tagg as proof that they can

exitseven · Answer

If you used to date somebody or used to have sex with him I would not like it either.

RuthlessAggression · Answer

I just don't understand why people think theyr'e 5 years old anymore GROW UP

HaveNoName · Answer

Unless the guy finds the girl completely interactive and physically undesirable, there is no such thing as "just friends".

genericname85 · Answer

no i don't believe that. however i do think that one side falling for the other is quite likely.

Aiko_E_Lara · Answer

It's not like all women are types of one man or vice versa. If the logic is "they might fall in love" then no bisexuals can have friends.

driven159 · Answer

time for you to do some soul searching and decide what you want lying about seeing guys is not going to end well so the ball is in your court

Anonymous · Answer

It’s true in most cases it seems to happen because you’re spending time with them but if you’re a trusting person it won’t happen or if you both have someone else then it’s safer

MrJMM · Answer

Yeah, since most of my friends are female. Only like three friends are male so...

Anonymous · Answer

If a women over 30 I can be friend with her because I'm not attracted to 30 women.

Ms_Facesitter · Answer

No they can be friends. But not with all of them.

Anonymous · Answer

Men are only friends with females they find sexually interesting.

sheikalana · Answer

I always had male friends since I was a teenager.

Jamie05rhs · Answer

What do you need male friends for?

jahaims · Answer

I've had the same female friends for over a decade

Iron_Man · Answer

I don’t believe you can once you dated

JohnK123 · Answer

Ofc they can be friends

jimmy2 · Answer

Odds are one will and one won't

RobEurope · Answer

Women will always want sex.

joeldalton · Answer

yes, I believe that.

In_Trance · Answer

Yeah

AFretiredTXn · Answer

Probably

Anonymous · Answer

Mostly true

Do you believe Men & women can't be friends as they might fall for each other or something?

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Do you think that men and women can be just friends?

Do you believe Men & women can't be friends as they might fall for each other or something?

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