This is me, I’m currently in the same situation except I’m just like the guy in your situation. I can’t tell you what’s going on in his head but I can tell you what’s going on in mine and maybe that’ll help you understand things better from a different perspective.
So we’ve been dating for 7 months and I was finally ready to make things official, he wasn’t but he wanted to still have me around. Tbh, I felt rejected and I started overthinking (maybe I’m not good enough? Maybe he only wants to use me? Maybe I’m just a placeholder for him?).
So I waited and gave him another 5 months - he still isn’t ready. That got me spiraling down and I started questioning what I wanted and his intentions bc I thought 1 year was already long enough for him to know if he wants to make things official or not. I became unsure about him bc I felt like he was just stringing me along so I needed some more time to take things slow to see if I still wanted the same thing as before.
I guess I’ve been waiting for too long to the point that I’ve already given up on the idea of being together and I’m not sure if I even want it anymore (even after he told me that he wants to commit).
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You can avoid all of this by making boundaries that you enforce. Your boundary was that you wanted to take things slow, but you broke it by being intimate. Therefore you demonstrated that not only do you not enforce your own boundaries, but your word doesn't really mean anything. When this occurs, the guy won't trust you enough to be exclusive. You are all over the place and this comes from not knowing exactly why you're even dating or looking to be exclusive, and not knowing your value, or what you have to offer. At your age that's normal but also suggests that instead of dating and trying to find another, instead you should be trying to find yourself.
Go with your gut ⁉️ What did he say when you confronted him on the “multiple girl” concern?
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