Is a woman who wants a lot of children a turnoff?

[Sun_Kim-Ai]

Question primarily aimed to the guys, but girls too are welcome to give their opinion.

In my case I'm pretty neutral about it. My wife wants a numerous and healthy family and she always made it clear, so if I was against it I wouldn't have married her.

[CrazyGirl2]

How can you be “neutral” on whether you have no children, one child, two children, or TEN children? I don’t believe that anyone can have NO opinion on how many children they have. And it has nothing to do with money, I have more money that I will ever be able to spend sitting in my trust fund. Yet I refuse to have any more than three children, and I want two close together, and one perhaps when the other two are between ages 7 and 10. I could afford to have a baby a year from now until menopause, and still be wealthy, but I could never give each child the attention he or she deserves and desperately needs! If I have triplets, quads, or quintuplets, obviously I will love them all equally, but there is NO way that I could give each child the attention they need and deserve… especially in the foundational years of birth to age 5. It just can’t be done! I’ve heard parents with more than 5 children say “we manage”. But is merely managing, the best thing for the children? You need to decide how many kids you want, and find a woman who wants the same. It may make finding the right woman more difficult, but ignoring the issue of children to make it easier to find a wife.. well frankly that seems like a cop-out. (And I truly mean no offense, I genuinely wish to help you live a happier, more fulfilling life.)

[Sun_Kim-Ai]

I guess I'm just indifferent to the whole thing, honestly. I already have one daughter, it's fine if my wife wants more children.
I'd be happy with even just one, but two or three is fine too.
It's not something we use to get too concerned about here - my grandfather didn't care much and my father too only started really talking to me once I was about 20.
We have the money and resources to raise and educate all the children we want, so number doesn't really concern me - I'm just happy to have at least one who'll be my heir.

[CrazyGirl2]

Okay, well I wish you the best of luck. Please forgive my ignorance, but your name appears Korean to me, and as I know nothing about Korean (or any Asian) dating/courtship practices, I don’t know what to say at this point. I know in the wealthiest communities here in the U. S. it is very bad for a young, never married woman to marry a divorced man, or especially a man with prior children. But we live in completely different cultures. So I wish you nothing but the best in life, I hope you are blessed with a beautiful wife and as many children as you both want, and especially an heir. Good luck my friend.

[CrazyGirl2]

And before the trolls jump in… Because I did not want any language barrier to cause any confusion, rather than saying that it is frowned upon for a young, never married woman to marry a divorced man, especially with children. I deliberately chose the word “bad”! I understand that it happens all the time, but it is still none the less frowned upon. I felt bad would translate better than “frowned upon”.

[midnightmoon05]

Depends. We are on vacation and see so many amazing families. They have 2-5 kids. Well behaved. Good quality families. So this will not be a turn off.
I do think the two of you will also make a good healthy/quality family of 2-4 children.
I have two, they require work, but it’s worth it and they are good kids.

[Ευδεμονια]

I think in general it isn’t a turnoff, on contrary, it’s a good thing, the woman has a good motherly instinct.
I think it also depends by economic conditions… a baby is a cost, a lot of babies costs a lot of money. For example in my country parents have zero support and life cost is extremely high in comparison to wages so… here a woman willing to have a lot of babies isn’t a red flag but… she’ll probably be obligated to reconsider her will.

[HighValue]

I am okay with 3 to 5 kids. More than that would be too many because each one wouldn't get enough attention from the parents. Plus 5 would be the max because then with me and my SO, that would be 7, which is what would fit in a normal size passenger van.

[OlderAndWiser]

When I was a young man, I would have been open to having a family of four children.

[Jamie05rhs]

I was, too. Back when I was young and naive. Lol

[letuswaltzforthedead]

I'm not completely sure. I would also like a big family but if I'm in a queer relationship, I'm not sure how that would work. there is also additional questions: can either person compromise? Who's going to be the main caretaker and how? As a SAHP or will daycare be needed? I guess part of the question is more clear if the couple is hetero. Best of wishes to you and your family though.

[Flower7]

How many kids do you and your wife have so far?

[Sun_Kim-Ai]

Just had the first one, she wants at least three.

[fonduegirl]

At least three? Damn.

[Kaneki05]

I dislike humans and I really dislike human offspring's so yes. Other than maybe adoption of a kid already somewhat grown up I don't see myself having a child.

[Guy13]

Not to me... I have friends with 5 kids expecting to hit 7. Have 45 year old lady friend who has 9 kids. I know a lot of Bible believing Christians and their Families tend to be 3-5 on average.

[SmokinAces2000]

It depends, some people see 3 or 4 as a lot and I think i would be ok with that many if I had my finances in order but if she wants more than 4 than I don’t know about that. I already have 1 and my girlfriend and I agreed not to have another one for at least 5 years

[Avicenna]

Nope, a woman who wants a big family is my dream woman (as long as she doesn't have any already)

[andreasderjuengere]

I will not mention my vasectomy, and work vigorously on giving her the babies she wants.

[fonduegirl]

That's so fucking hot 🔥

[letuswaltzforthedead]

Honestly. I've seen a lot of disgusting comments on this site but I think you take the cake on this one. No offense but yes.

[andreasderjuengere]

@letuswaltzforthedead Don't take things so stiffly, and work on your skills to detect sarcasm :)
Peace.

[Jacobbbb]

Depends on how many kids she's talking about but generally no it's not

[slatyb]

She would be for me, and would have been when I was younger.

[fonduegirl]

Oh yes. Huge dealbreaker for me. Can't be my girlfriend.

[jshm2]

As long as they are able to afford and care for them. Of course it's none of my concern.

[MannMitAntworten]

No. Just be open with one another about this because few want kids at all anymore. Definitely a discussion to have before getting married.

[Berethor]

It's better than women that don't want children, those ones are pretty useless in the long run.

[TheUniqueOne96]

Yeah, but only because I don't want kids myself.

[Beardedman1996]

Yes, going into a world where the economy is shot, moneys tight for everyone and everyone is doing their best to hold onto their sanity I think the last thing y’all should be wanting is more children

[pizzalovershouse]

That many kids in photo would do some serious damage to ovaries

[tony_love_girls]

Hey Just think about your anual income then give born 5 or 12 child.

[Agape93]

Yeap. I don't like kids.

[Gangactivities911]

To someone who doesn’t want a lot of children yes

[TonightYouu]

Children are a turnoff no matter the how many of those little bastards there are

[Anonymous]

Doesn't mean she wants a lot of kids just means she loves children.

[Jamie05rhs]

For me, yes. No offense, though.

[animesenpai]

Yeah as financially it is horrifying

[exitseven]

my ex girlfriend wanted to have ten kids.

[altaboy]

Yes. I can't afford that.

[Waldoe]

not far a man that also wants a lot of children...

[Cubus]

No, why?

[JohnK123]

Not at all

[maximumpower]

Oh, Hell YES

[EaterPeter]

Yes.

[EnglishEuropean]

Not to me.

[Dinosaursandanime65]

For me absolutely

[SevilleJuan]

Yes.