Am I hopeless? Should I even bother?

[Anonymous]

I'm 49. I'll be 50 in a few months. I haven't had much luck with women. I've only been in 3 relationships my whole life and they were all toxic. I can't even approach women because of social anxiety. Online dating I get nothing but catfish. Should I just give up and accept that I'll die alone? Because I'm tired of trying.

[PrettyPriya]

My opinion is no... do not give up. Never give up on anything. Once you start down that path of just giving up on things because they are tough, it becomes easier and easier to do with everything in life. You develop a defeatist attitude.

I'm sorry you have had such toxic relationships. That is terrible when that sort of thing happens. That does not mean you cannot still find a really nice woman that won't be toxic.

Regardless of age, you and others deserve the chance to be happy. Giving up is throwing away that chance, however slim you think it to be.

My advice is to get involved in local clubs or activity groups that interest you. You will meet likeminded people and possibly some women that would be of interest. This method, you already share a common interest and easy to break the ice.

Online dating is not something I have ever done because of some of the reasons you list. It never interested me. I think meeting people in person through social events is much more productive.

[coachTanthony]

Social anxiety is all in your head. It's simply a fear of outcome. If you just approached women for fun and had no expectation that would change. As for online dating I can almost guarantee you didn't even do it. And if you did you didn't really try. You need great photos, great bio and some common sense to succeed in online dating. When people tell me online dating is nothing but catfishes that is SUS. Especially at our age. The older we get the better online dating is because most people our age are real. You don't see 45 year old ONLY FAN and SNAP CHAT models tryin to get your money.

So yes please do yourself a favor and admit you just simply don't want to do the work, change, and better yourself. You have way too many negative self fulfilling prophecies. You should of said what can I do better? Not should I give up?

Good luck though.

Sincerely,

some tough love

[Guy13]

Go to meetups www.meetup.com. There are hundreds of people and you almost are forced to wave or speak to someone !!

[hafinjun]

What did the 3 share as similar , you have to learn from your errors, I used to have a sticker on my keyboard that read,"no matter how good she looks, someone , sewhere is sick of her shit,"yes the same could be said for guys.

[Avicenna]

You’re at an age where it’s easier to get a girlfriend, but there are fewer women that are long-term relationship material, so don’t feel bad.

[slatyb]

Seek counseling. There are equally lonely women out there. Online dating worked well for me.

[Anonymous]

If only men worried about their life purpose, and put this much care and effort into it...

[Willoughby23]

I gave up on approaching in person and Im only 25. I only use online dating which rarely works. I've never been in a relationship.

[Jamie05rhs]

You should probably diversify your strategy. Otherwise you may end up like me. (10 years later. Still single.)

[Willoughby23]

@Jamie05rhs I don’t mind being single, I don’t want kids or marriage and a relationship doesn’t sound that good either tbh.

[Jamie05rhs]

Okay. No problem, then. 🙂

[Jamie05rhs]

Can you show us a photo?

[In_Trance]

So don't bother with it anymore

[Anonymous]

My opinion is no