Thinking what to do?

[Anonymous]

I've been seeing my ex girlfriend for 3 months now and we've hungout, went on dates, sex and everything... we went 2 months in the summer without seeing each other and we're not exclusive right now and she's talked about other guys and I had a feeling she's been talking to other guys at the same time and so last night while we were sleeping, I went through her text messages (which I've never done before, with anyone) and I was right. I couldn't read the one thread of messages from this one guy because they weren't open yet but I saw his last text, " goodnight sweet dreams" but I was able to read messages from this other guy and it's clear she's seeing him too. Kissy face emojis, planning hangouts, flirt talk and everything... so now I know 100%. We've talked about having kids and getting married but there's at least 2 other guys... so now I'm all fucked up on what to do... cuz I know she's essentially doing everything with him, same with what we do... clearly seems like I'm behind him. I love this girl and I told her how I feel and wanna be with her and everything (didn't tell her that I love her) but said everything else... she has commitment issues and fears.. but it's like ugh, now what?

[MsMJprodigy]

Coming from what happened with my previous ex and how our relationship didn’t work out anymore after we broke up I would say I wouldn’t try to be with her anymore unless you set serious ground rules that neither of you are going to see anyone else. She has already started seeing and talking to other guys (my ex did this with 3 women over the 9 months we tried to work things out) and yet he still ended up leaving me for someone else. In my experience she is probably just keeping you around until she finds someone else she wants more than you. Don’t let yourself be taken advantage of. Make things very clear in what you expect from her and what she will expect from you and if she can’t do that just end it. It will be better for your mental health in the long run to not be worrying she’s talking/seeing other people.