Is a 5 year age gap to my boyfriend a bad thing?

Question

SteveSmith1985 · Accepted Answer

Since you're as young as you are: yes, it's a bad thing. THat doesn't automatically mean that it's a bad thing in every single specific situation. But in general, yes.

It doesn't matter as much when you get older (the same way a 15 year old is MUCH older than a 10 year old). But at your age, in most cases, it's problematic.

My first question would be: "What kind of 22 year old would be ok with dating a 17 year old?" the answer is, "not many'. So why isn't this guy going for girls his own age? It's not ok to bring your 17 year old girlfriend to hang out with you and your friends when you're in your 20's.

It's just... inherently weird. You won't understand this until you reach his age, and look at how much younger girls who are 17 seem to you. And when you're in your 20's and picture your guys friends dating someone in high school... you'll understand what I mean.

There are some exceptions. Let's say this guy is a friend of the family who you hang out with for a month each summer when you go on a yearly family vacation. You've known this guy for years, and have sorta grown-up together. If something develops between those two... a 5 year age gap isn't so bad.

But just two people looking for partners? I"d have some serious questions about this guy and his intentions. I can elaborate on that if you want. But that's what it comes down to.

Just, please be careful. 🙂

AviatorTom · Accepted Answer

If you're under 18 and he's over 18, that's not good. If you're having sex, in some places that would be statutory rape and he could be jailed. When you get to be over 18, a 5-year gap would be fine.

CrazyGirl2 · Accepted Answer

Well you are under 18, so yes! It’s not that it’s just a “bad thing”, its inappropriate & (depending on the jurisdiction, it’s likely highly illegal as well! An age difference like that, at such a young age, creates a natural power imbalance which he can easily exploit for HIS own advantage! Also, why would you want a man whom you KNOW is attracted to teenage girls?

Beatrix7 · Accepted Answer

no not at all i was 29 about to turn 30 when i met my ex and he was about to turn 25 it more diffrent if he or she was 18 and the other person was 30 I've told a guy at 22 online that asked me dirty photos i said no am 32 ure only 22 sorry 5 years older is nothing unless they are under 18

Avicenna · Answer

Very bad if you’re under 18. Otherwise, not at all.

Summeroflove · Answer

If you’re under 18 It can be….

Dawty · Answer

Depends on your country's laws. In my country if you are 15 or older, sex is allowed so not worries. In the US however its a problem, you may not be old enough to have sex even though you can drive and carry a gun... I really don't get Americans sometimes. 😕

DaisyM23 · Answer

You're under 18, don't look older than 16, yeah it's a big thing. Where does a teenager meet someone 5 years older than her, why did your boyfriend find it okay to date a teenager and what do you have in common if you're both in such big different stages in life?

RavVid · Answer

Depends where you are. If in your locale you are not of age of consent then the the 5 year gap could get him into legal trouble. There are Romeo and Juliet provisions about underage sex but a 5 year gap would likely put him outside of those provision.

If not than whats wrong with a 5 year difference?

Twalli · Answer

Under 18 it's a bit much. I started dating my girlfriend at 27, and our age gap is about 5.5 years. That's less weird. My dad is 6 years older than my mom. Yet their relationship started after they were 20 also. My mom was 21 when they started dating.

DribbleGodCurt · Answer

Yeah it's a bad thing in my opinion bc you're in different stages of life also he looks like shaggy and gives white van with free candy on the side vibes in my opinion.

Price511 · Answer

You’re under 18. Under those circumstances, that is usually a crime or looked down upon across the globe, and for good reason. That is bad 💀

ultimega · Answer

It depends on you're age. If you're like 15 and he's 20 then that raises a lot of red flags as you'll be seen as a minor and then other as a pedo
But once you pass 18 then you're likely to be viewed as an adult which doesn't matter.

JamesDiaz11 · Answer

A 5 year age gap isn't a bad thing if you're both adults, but this guy looks like a pedophile and you're under 18; so...

slatyb · Answer

Not necessarily but it's somewhat likely. I don't know because I don't know you or him. If you are under 18 and I were your parent I would be asking a lot of questions.

Berethor · Answer

You under 18 so it might, though in the photo the girl look grown up, as she not short.

Paulalove98 · Answer

If you're under 18 it's not good. When you're 18 then sure it's okay.

lightbulb27 · Answer

he looks guilty as heck, yes. send him to jail. and he's married... good grief...

TheVigilantOne · Answer

You’re under 18? So yes it’s a bad thing unless he’s also under 18! If he’s older than 18 he’s a pedophile.

NotTacocaT6969 · Answer

Not really, but be careful.  Being used hurts.

suzzieQ · Answer

As a minor, that’s generally illegal, predatory, abusive… so in most cases, yes, even though most would also thing that they are the exception

TroyDT2 · Answer

Depending upon where you live, it could get him locked up and a lifetime on the sex offenders list or it might be legal.

Fireguy17 · Answer

It can depend on your current age. The older you get the less important it becomes.

LovingJo · Answer

Nope!! As long as it's legal and you both get on, what's the problem? 😘

exitseven · Answer

if you are under 18 and having sex with him it is bad.

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

If one of your parents agree to it, I doubt that it would be a major issue.

ariadneR · Answer

If you're under 18 yes, if not then you're good to go. My man and I are 7 years apart

FilmGuy93 · Answer

It's a little much, at your age, but that's not necessarily a bad thing.

Anonymous · Answer

I don't feel comfortable talking about this stuff.

CoolCatMar1 · Answer

Nooo not at all but i think i saw this photo again here

Cedman · Answer

it depends your under 18 and if your boyfriend over 18 then that's a problem. That is illegal and considered statutory rape, in many states. Unless your in Europe or Asia or Middle East or somewhere.

linka_pat307 · Answer

It isn't buh as long as you guys understand each other

AllGoodNamesRGone · Answer

No, as long as u guys compatible it doesn't matter.

es20490446e · Answer

As long as you are at the age of consent in your country, it is fine.

gcd84 · Answer

5 years in either direction is a bad thing when you're under 18, but a 5 year gap becomes less creepy, less statutory rapey, and less of a big deal the older you get.

Dinosaursandanime65 · Answer

Now wait a minute…. If you’re 12…. And he’s 17….. *Rock reference*

OddBeMe · Answer

Yes. Under 18? He’s a pedo who will drop you for another 15 yr old. That’s why its illegal.

In_Trance · Answer

bad in what sense? That you can order off the child menu and he can't?

TallAnon · Answer

13 and 18 would be weird, 17 and 22 is less weird, 20 and 25 is fine.

cathy1221 · Answer

Absolutely not... love is not about the age factor.. if he makes you happy and he is loyal then everything is fine

nick0980 · Answer

Me and my partner have a 16.5 year gap. I am 42 and she is 25

Anonymous · Answer

Yes, if you are underage then he is too old for you.

musicbrain5 · Answer

Since you’re under 18, yes.

loveslongnails · Answer

What are your ages and where do you live?

Sparkie460 · Answer

It depends on how old you are.

MannMitAntworten · Answer

Not remotely as long as you are both adults.

Gloree · Answer

if you're past 20 it starts to feel ok.

BJP21 · Answer

5 years is fine over age 18.

Wise4myage · Answer

Seems ok to me if its legal.

driven159 · Answer

It depends on how old you are

vj0090 · Answer

I think age gap of 4-5 years is fine

Agape93 · Answer

Depends on the ages

YourFavoriteFriend · Answer

Do you mind?

elizamichale1 · Answer

Thats alright honey

Anonymous · Answer

Why is it a bad thing?

Jamie05rhs · Answer

Yes.

Papabubbles · Answer

No not 5 years

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