For which gender is dating harder?

[Anonymous]

[AviatorTom]

Guys get hard and women get wet... but I don't think that's what your question is about.

It's more difficult for guys to date. Guys are the ones who almost always do the asking out, and many women turn them down. It would be rare for a guy to turn down a woman.

There was an informal test done several years ago. An attractive woman asked random guys on the street if they would like to have sex with her, while a handsome guy did the same a few blocks away with random women. Many more men said they'd have sex than women did, even if the guy sweetened the question by offering money.

[WhiteBoyChill]

I remember that experiment. Literally every girl in the video I watched said no to the guy.

[Sixgunsound]

@WhiteBoyChill how many called police? Thats the likely response these days.

[tzdc21]

Men. No question. Most guys struggle to get sex, or get into relationships. Hence the reason why only fans and strip clubs are thriving, why 1/3 men under the age of 30 is either a virgin or hasn't had sex in a year, why there are multiple videos teaching guys how to get laid, and the risks of being a victim of false allegations (happens to women too but mostly men are the victims) when they did absolutely nothing wrong, and then there are the marriage laws that are stacked against men. In all it's harder for guys to navigate the dating atmosphere.

[Anonymous]

I don’t know. Men are the pursuers and have to take the risk of rejection, which I know is hard, but we are constantly being gamed for sex and have to discern who is legitimately interested in us and who just wants to use us. It’s often very hard to tell.

[NavyblueTacos]

A lot of people in here are writing men, lol. I think dating is hard for most people, and I guess the ones its hardest for, are the ones trying the most, since they will see every time it fails, maybe thats men, maybe its women, different struggles

[Guy13]

Men have and will continue to be the pursuer. It is in our Intelligent Design. The woman may tweak or even initiate the process, however, men are ultimately held as the responsibility party.

[JamesDiaz11]

Short answer: Guys

As everyone knows by now, 80% of girls are going for the top 20% of guys. Girls enjoy far more prospects, and can get a date with a guy (maybe not their dream guy) relatively easy. Average guys may not get a date for years.

However, actually getting a guy to date her long-term is more difficult for girls as once they qualify a guy (that he's great enough to catch her interest- meaning he's also got the attention of other girls) they have to convince them to focus on them exclusively. Girls nowadays have very little to offer a guy to focus on them exclusively.

[WhiteBoyChill]

To illustrate your point,
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=35fiNZTVVtU

[MCheetah]

Objectively, it is and always has been men. Because women can get sex easier and men desire it more and that gives women more "value."

Why is dating much harder for guys?

Dating is not hard for modern women whatsoever. Most modern women just have ridiculously over-the-top standards. As in, "perfection or nothing at all." They won't accept short men, non-wealthy men, non-successful men, etc. And if they could match those traits in the men they desire, that'd be one thing. But no; they are 3s and 4s expecting 9s and 10s. Aka, Hypergamy. Which is also typical when women are and always have been the more desired gender.

[Jaximus-Lion]

We still doing this? I asked in real life all the girls and women i know what pick-up lines on guys do they use, they all answered with (Women/girls don't use pick up lines on dudes) and that is very usual in Sweden. I asked them more questions, of course i would, i am an A-hole. I asked them would they ask a guy out on a date? 80% said (no) and followed by a hard (NEVER). Why? Because it's not their part to do any of this. It's always the dude has to extra effort. The effort to have a nie pick-up line, charming, tall, so on and so on. I know there is ladies out there whom asks guys/men out and give them compliments but! Here in Sweden it is very unusual. Men has most of the things in life more difficult. You can make a list all you want

[WhiteBoyChill]

Its just like that here tbh.

But at least in Sweden you have some of the world’s more attractive women

[Jaximus-Lion]

@WhiteBoyChill this is a very common general thing that the americans say to them selves all the time, which is not the case here, but fine 🤷‍♂️

[Anonymous]

In todays world. Is it even dating anymore? Hook up culture has taken over. I wouldn’t call that dating. After loosing my son and then his mother and I splitting up I was forced into the “dating “ scene for the first time since high school. Eventually I just said. “Screw it “ And lived my life. I don’t fit into the new ways. A woman came to me. And the rest is history lol. Seemed the best tactic for this new scene was to legit not care if I found someone or not and to legit stop actively looking/ trying. I just focused on my job. My hobbies, myself. And the rest fell into place.

[MountAverage]

It is hard in very different ways for women and men, so I don't think it can be properly compared. Men have to compete a lot, they have to stand out in a sea of other competing men of which most go completely unnoticed. Women on the other hand, while having countless options all of the time, have to not only weed through all of these options, but on their way they have to deal with all sorts of creepy behavior, animosities, shaming and harrassment.

So if your only criterion is quantity, men have it harder by far. But if you add quality to the equation, women have it harder by far.

[TheSpaceGnome]

It's harder for men.

Men are told we have to chase, but get punished for it, and women get love for just being themselves way more commonly than men do, because a lot of women were taught thar "it's ok to becan entitled gold digger" because every relationship problem is "the man's responsibility" (which is bs).

[TheSpaceGnome]

that*

[TheSpaceGnome]

be an*

[Izzy_3991]

Dang! What kind of women have you been dating 😅🤣

[TheSpaceGnome]

@Izzy_3991 I've only dated a few women, and despite them having other negatives that lead to breakups, they didn't do any of that.

I'm only into artistically talented atheist gamers that like tech, science, sci-fi, fantasy, anime, and animals.

I'm just very observant of other people's relationships, or rather they are very loud about their problems lol.

[WhiteBoyChill]

Men.

I mean were the ones expected to do all the approaching. Girls just get to sit back and pick from their pool of guys.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/jPuQ1Wjd2Rk

I mean just look at f*cking Tinder! Men swipe right around 50% of the time but for women its usually only around 2-3%.

And you might think “oh low quality men” but that’s really not the case when even this guy had absolutely no luck.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/35fiNZTVVtU

Modern womens dating standards just suck.

[Jamie05rhs]

That dude looks like Bert from Sesame Street.

[WhiteBoyChill]

@Jamie05rhs the cover photo isn’t very good. But in his other photos he looks about average and he is a highly educated and involved individual.

[Jamie05rhs]

@WhiteBoyChill Ok; cool.

[Anonymous]

Both have their advantages and disadvantages. The key to understanding this question is that men and women have different priorities, and both see the issue through the lens of their own needs.

Men are driven more by sex, and women more by commitment. That gives women the ability of sit back and be passive in the dating game and allow men to pursue them. So in that sense women definitely have it easier.

Where it becomes more difficult for women is when they want to get a good man to commit to them and/or marry them, because it is men who control that choice. It has become much more difficult for women in recent decades because men are increasingly cynical about commitment and especially marriage because marriage is not the same as it used to be and men benefit much less from marriage now than they used to.

So ultimately it evens out and both face challenges, but it's human nature to thing "it's harder for us than it is for them".

[Anonymous]

If you're talking about hetero dating, every single time a guy is on a date, so is a girl and vice versa. So pretty much by definition things would be exactly the same for each.

If you're talking about homo dating, I'm not sure, but I'd guess gay dudes date and swap around a lot more than lesbians do, so it's probably easier for guy guys to date but harder to get committed relationships and easier for lesbians to get into long relationships but harder to date. That's just a guess though.

[Anonymous]

I think it depends the way you want to look at it. Given the way women are it's probably harder for them to find a decent as most of the are very stunted in understanding what makes a quality guy

But typically guys have to endure a lot of rejection to find a woman who'll date him. So some guys simply do not use thier head and say NO when they meet a bad woman. Because I don't think most guys look deep enough when they first meet a woman. Women have guys outmatched by 100 times in this area. And since women today largely have no shame. Women know they can use any feminine wile to try to control a man.

If I vote I'd say it's slight edge to women. Because women can generally get most guys, but are incapable of determining character. Guys on the other hand have trouble getting women so while they can identify good women they can't typically land them. So they resort to the woman that'll take them sort of out of desperation. And she's usually not a very good woman.

[Adam1978]

It's not easy for anyone but certainly harder for most men. Unless you are chad. Women has the opposite issue unless you are among the fat and ugly you can get into a relationship, after that it's just a matter of settling with your expectations. If they keep running after chad they will struggle however.

[connemara_crocodile]

I think it's difficult on both sides for different reasons.

The guy needs to put more on the dates. I've been on many dates where the girl did absolutely nothing and yet I felt I had to put on everything to either get a second date or get a night (depending the girl).

For the girls I guess it's hard because of the danger of it. From psychos, to guys who want nothing but sex, idiots, etc.

[DarkWinterNights]

It’s hard in general. But it’s been harder for older unmarried, divorced or widowed women for a long time. Recently a very rapid increase in perpetually single young men is going to combine to result in the majority of the population single and childless by 2030.

[Jamie05rhs]

It's (slightly) easier for women to get sex.

It's easier for women to get a fake (short-term) relationship.

It's harder for both genders to get a real (long-term) relationship.

DATING itself (the functional process) is easier for men. As in, they're more comfortable doing it. It's harder for women because they are overthinkers. Their feelings get in the way of their other feelings which get in the way of their other feelings.

[AmyHew1tt]

Both, just for different reasons. In general, it seems like the beginning is hardest for guys, approaching, dates, and all that. Then long-term relationship-wise, it starts getting harder on the women.

[Looksnicholas]

The fair answer has to be, every gender can have it tough, I mean, looks, personality, it can be a shallow world as much as it can be a merry world. Lol. 😁

[DoctorSex]

Dating should have been considerably harder for men, but since the onset of feminism, dating is extremely easy for men and extremely difficult for women.

Kind regards,

DoctorSex

[DoctorSex]

Then again Im probably biased. My life story has been one of women chasing after me. Most men do not have this type of history. But in terms of what is required for dating, it has become a lot easier for men.

Kind regards,
DoctorSex

[inhua]

overall it's men. the average man doesn't fit the bare minimum standards of modern women some of which are completely outside their control such as height.

[FilmGuy93]

Men, and it can’t even be disputed. Here’s how I know; men date women, and women, by their own admission, make dating so needlessly difficult that it makes life harder for other women.

[NerdInDenial]

It’s harder for men because they have less opportunities and they are expected to do most of the work: initiation, paying for dinner, planning etc

[MCheetah]

And this is why so many men are opting out of dating and focusing more on themselves.

[NerdInDenial]

@MCheetah hit the nail on the head…

[Anonymous]

I think there’s drawbacks on both genders.
I think lifestyle, choices, attraction, beliefs, values and interest are huge factors when it comes to dating. Both genders have it hard when these factors are calculated.

[ThinkFitness23]

Girls, many are just looking for love…


Many guys are just looking for sex and fall in love by chance

[Fuentes]

In 2022 it's harder for males but most males are weird retarded simps whi are suckered for love and can't court women and they cry about it and become incels. I have no idea the science behind that I just call it bitchassness.

[Nik1hil]

It is not a gender thing...

Dating is hard for a :

1) poor men.

2) Physically unattractive women.

[PizzaPieMamaBear]

For men!!! Really especially at your age!! It’s way harder for men

[Anonymous]

Men, No question. Most women can get a date with relatively little effort, for MOST men like 80% it requires extensive effort, for almost 50% of men its almost impossible.

[Berethor]

It tend to be much harder as men, that's why a man is like a key, a woman is like a lock.

[Anonymous]

Obviously it's harder for guys. And that's why online dating is such a failure.

[MCheetah]

Thank you for being a woman and actually admitting it! Most women can't even do that, cause its admitting they have a huge advantage.

[Opinion Owner]

@MCheetah
Before you thank me, there are two sides to every story. The reason women appear to hold all the cards, is because men hand them the entire deck of cards. Why? They think that's what works. It obviously doesn't work.

My advice to men is to approach a woman as if she's a big, fat, sweaty lumberjack, with a mouth full of chew.

What would you say to the lumberjack?

*You" Wow, the snow is really coming down. I like going out and mingling with people, but I feel so stupid for choosing the car I bought."

There's no way in hell that the lumberjack won't ask you what car you bought.

You're now on your way.

Capture her mind, and the goodies will follow. If you do that in reverse, you're going to go down in flames.

[MCheetah]

Well I think the reason women have the advantage is because they're the ones who get pregnant, so literally are the ones who determine life and future offspring. People forget that back before all this modern BS, survival was the name of the game. It's why women rarely ever had to fight in wars, slave in factories and have been pampered for most of human history. Because they're the ones to pop out the kids.

The f*cked up thing is, modern women don't even want to have kids anymore, but still expect all the same perks and special privileges that women have always gotten because they were expected to be mothers. Without sounding too harsh, if a modern woman doesn't want to have kids, then she needs to put in the "men's work" and fully embrace "equality" or shut the f*ck up. Cause unless you're a simp/loser, she isn't deserving of both.

The other problem is, too many simps don't understand this, as you implied. But it's the truth: Women get their asses kissed in society because they're expected to be mothers. If a woman isn't going to be a mother, she's essentially a man in society, and shouldn't expect motherly perks when she's not going to contribute to continuing the species.

Now I feel like making this a GAG question to explore it more.

Regarding your example, that won't work at all, because men don't kiss each other's asses, and don't give a damn what the lumberjack is going to think of him. I actually DO already treat women like this on a daily basis, because I quit the dating game years ago. This is exactly why half the retarded liberal women on this site think I'm a "sexist/incel." Because I treat women exactly like I do men. Because I'm not interested in sex or dating from them. Ironically, many women in real life tend to like me MORE because of this, probably in the same way they like married men more. But those women also assume I'm off the market like a married man, as well. And I never bother to correct them.

[MCheetah]

If a modern woman has no desire to ever be a mother or have kids, should she still get special treatment for her gender, or be treated equally to men? ↗

[Opinion Owner]

@MCheetah

You're in a grocery store. You see a lady in your same isle.

You: Excuse me, I met a lady yesterday, and she wants me to make her spaghetti. I'm good at the noodle part, but is it OK for me to just buy the spaghetti sauce in a jar? Will she be able to tell?
I'm not opposed to learning how to make spaghetti sauce, but I'm running out of time. I just really want this to go well.

That's how you talk to a lumberjack. You just created a fan and a cheerleader.

[MCheetah]

Why would a lumberjack care about this conversation? Or be willing to talk to you? Or not tell you to get lost? And why would you ask a random person this? Why would you assume they even know? Also, if you just lied and told her you already met someone, why would this woman/lumberjack even care about you? Maybe it's different with women, but most men don't want to hear about an attractive woman's male partner; since she's off-the-market and they don't care about helping other men they don't know, get laid.

Maybe I'm autistic and don't get it. I *do* know how to talk to women and the psychology of how they think, and it essentially amounts to telling them what they want to hear, whether that be through lies or clever twists of the truth. However, without looksmaxing, all that does is result in getting Friendzoned and it's why Chads don't have to be charming or conversationalists. Women either immediately like you, or they don't. Very rarely can you change a woman's mind from a First Impression, which they will make about you within seconds.

[Opinion Owner]

@MCheetah
Did you ever read or watch the video about the founder of this site? You should check it out.
This site was all about guys asking girls. I don't know how that got flipped around.

1. Why would a lumberjack want to talk to you? Because he's human and that's part of life. If he's in a bad mood and doesn't want to talk, he will reply with a one word answer. That's your clue to get lost.

2. Why would you assume that the lady in the store knew about spaghetti sauce? You're not assuming anything. You're just asking a question.

3. If you told the store lady that you already met someone, why would she try and help you?
Because the minute you approach her, she will put up her force-field shields and want a mote between you and her that's filled with alligators. You can change all of that by letting her know that she's not the victim you're after. She will let out a sigh of relief, and her natural, nurturing qualities will come out. If you're in an electronics store, and a woman tells you that she wants to buy a computer for her boyfriend, but says she doesn't know crap about which one to get; I bet you would NOT be offended, but flattered.

Don't believe me, but look up the story behind the founder of this site. Him and his buddy were in a bar, and watched guys approaching girls, and getting shot down in flames. They wondered why that is. They came up with a brilliant plan, and I already told you how it works. Check it out. :)

[MCheetah]

Imma be honest here
Most women have no clue what women want, and are literally the last people your should take dating advice from, regarding how to get women. Besides the old "you don't ask a fish how to catch fish" line, and besides the fact even most women don't even know what THEY want in a partner, women also have less experience in flirting with, let alone being successful with, women.

And the lesbians who are into women have the same advantage of having tits and not being male, that women have.

And when women DO try to attempt to get other women, catfishing as men on dating sites in all those "social experiment" videos you can find on YouTube, they fall spectacularly.
Literally 100% of the time Some even go, "wow, women are cruel!" Yeah, no sh*t! And water's wet.

The fact that you think men would be flattered that an attractive woman with a boyfriend asked you something, shows me you don't understand men at all. Because unless he's married, being preemptively friendzoned out of the blue, would piss most men off. That's like mocking you for being single. Might as well call you an Incel Virgin Loser and save herself some time. The moment I find out an attractive woman is off the market, I lose all interest in her and want nothing to do with her. This is how most men think. The fact you think a man would be flattered to be blue balled proves to me you're applying female logic to men, thinking that's how men think, when you couldn't be further from the truth.

I do know how you are behind the anonymity. But you're wrong this time. But you are right that men have it harder than women do in dating. It's just way harder than you can imagine. That's why the belief that being tall, fit, cocky, and successful/rich, is all you need to get a woman. It's because... THAT'S ALL TO NEED TO GET A WOMAN.

[Opinion Owner]

@MCheetah
What did you discover when you looked up the founder of this site?

[MCheetah]

The only video I found of him in English was a podcast talk, and I doubt that was what you were talking about.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kIWKdPt0HTY
So unless he has an English video, or you know the link of what you're referring to, then I have no idea what video you're talking about.

[Opinion Owner]

If you couldn't find it I doubt I can either.

[Anonymous]

It’s definitely harder for women because men Will never truly be satisfied with a woman unless she’s a prostitute. So the average woman doesn’t even stand a chance of ever pleasing a man

[BJP21]

Im going to have to say in a oxymoron, equal but different. Each gender looks for the specific traits they like. Physical, personality... etc.

[Twalli]

Guys. Girls can get dates more easily. They just may not like the guys who approach them

[KandiSwallows]

Male, easy. They must be able to provide, protect, enforce, and be a beast in the sheets. Men generally don't have sugar mommas. Females commonly look for "someone that can take care of them."

[dexter234]

I would say for guys, but my opinion is biased as I'm a guy

[dexter234]

Lol what woman

[dexter234]

Women🍮🍮😂

[BlueScorpio]

@Dior2022 gurl.. what? Lol

[PainusNdeeAnus]

Women and only because of the possibility of pregnancy

[This_Is_My_Opinion8]

Quantity is harder for guys, quality is harder for girls. Simple.

[Pohjolan]

Gals can be successful at dating by doing nothing.

Guys not so much.

[Anonymous]

Obviously thats guys.

women pick and choose

women call the shots.

[Anonymous]

Well men are always expected to initiate communication and do the pursuing

[jshm2]

The helicopter gender.

[Wise4myage]

Its ten times harder for men.

[Tina19]

For men of course

[melanieeeB]

Both

[IJhonnyI]

Simple answer MEN

[SplatoonFan2]

Both gender found harder to dating.

[Kingofkings1992]

Men without question.

[aaron210419]

Men, hands down

[HippieVeganJewslim]

Non-binary gender.

[In_Trance]

Equal