How to stop feeling bad for approaching girls in the groups I hang out with?

[Anonymous]

I am in my early twenties and I have had a breakup in the last months so I would like to have a new girlfriend with whom I could move together later and settle down. My other single friends never make a move on any girl from these groups and they complain every now and then about not being in relationships, but they say the want it to come naturally and all that. Since I am the only one who makes moves on girls, it sometimes feels inappropriate, as if I were a creep.

[CubsterShura]

I really don't know what making moves on a girl means to you, and what groups you are in, but I would suggest if it's only been a few months since you last had a relationship, don't be too eager to get a girlfriend already. If you socialize normally and happen to like someone then you can pursue them.

[Asker]

It means showing my romantic interest in her. I want to have a new relationship because I don't have one night stands or friendships with benefits, so I don't get affection and sexual gratification from elsewhere but relationships.

[CubsterShura]

I can respect that, I don't have one night stands or flings either. However, getting into a relationship just because you want sex could exactly be what's causing you difficulties in finding a girlfriend. Personally speaking I would never want to be with a guy who just wants sex, and when that's your mindset when approaching women, we can smell the desperation from miles away and it's not attractive. If you are seeing every interaction with a woman as an opportunity to make a girlfriend that's a problem.

Try to find support with your trustworthy male friends. If they aren't helping, e. g. encouraging you to do one night stands or mocking your position, you need better friends.

Sexual frustration is no joke and I totally get that. I get that too but I've been actively keeping myself away from being in a relationship because I understand it is a commitment and having a boyfriend right now would be me biting more than I can chew. Have patience, get support and if you're open to it, seek some counseling. It may help you build a more positive attitude.

[Asker]

To be honest, we all want relationships for physical and emotional affection. I know many girls and I am not feeling particularly attracted to most of them, but there are some whom I really like and being friendly never got me anywhere.

[ZXCwWRQWz]

Aim to charm the entire group. I know that's ambitious and you might not entirely succeed but aim for that as primary objective. Secondary objective is secure the one in the group you actually like but never start the secondary objective until the primary is reasonably complete.

[AngryCarl]

The human race depends on creeps like you for its very survival, so keep on creeping. In a non-creepy way if possible.

[Asker]

I don't do it in a creepy way, but unless I show some romantic interest, they assume I'm friendly

[AngryCarl]

Exactly right.

[Anonymous]

Shake it off and keep trying.