How long would you wait to find out your love interest is emotionally interested in you? Sexually?

Question

This is not for personal advice, I’m just curious if there is a large difference between the two and of course if the difference falls along gender lines.

Lliam · Accepted Answer

I voted 'A'. But I wouldn't be interested in waiting for a year. I'd say three months max, but preferably much sooner.

I never needed any loyalty guarantees or proclamations of love before engaging in an exclusive, boyfriend-girlfriend (sexual) relationship. Infatuation with a woman who wants a committed relationship (as opposed to mere sex) is good enough for me. We'll sort things out or not as time goes by. In the meantime, mutual infatuation is magical.

When it comes to an exclusive relationship that I hope will transform into a very deep bond, I think sex is essential. It's the greatest gift. It indicates a level of trust and commitment.

I like women with strong libidos who are picky about who they sleep with because I want them to like ME and think I'm a catch. She has standards. I don't want someone who will sleep with just anyone because she is horny. But I'm not interested in a girlfriend who needs guarantees before engaging in sex. Sex is joyful. I see no reason to wait an inordinate amount of time before celebrating our relationship.

The thing is, I date women as opposed to men because I'm interested in sex. That why I date women that I find attractive. But it's not all about looks. We have to really like each other and get along well. I like having a best friend to hang out, go places and do things with, and confide in. And I love the physical aspects of romance - holding hands, hugging, looking adoringly into each other's eyes, and feeling the thrill of sensuality.

NathanDavis · Accepted Answer

at this point of my life... I do not wait

I can usually tell within the day if they are INTRIGUED by any of me, intrigued being different from actually interested, the interest does show within the week or two weeks

in my case it is never subtle, because either I make things happen or give them room for things to develop and happen, and I never ever go after sex first, it is either emotionally or intellectually that I will start to feel that mutual attraction so, if it is NOT a mutual intrigue and then mutual interest, I just hold my horses completely and do not give myself ideas, that is when I just keep it casual and friendly and therefore keep myself out of trouble

Nomina · Accepted Answer

Why a year? Way less than that. It took me a long time to understand and come to grips that if someone doesn't reciprocate interest, I move on.

Dwelling on how they may or may not feel with no show of it, is a waste of time and emotionally draining and torturous, to me.

melanieeeB · Accepted Answer

Mostly you find out the sexually interested part first lol  But sometimes good things need time and I don't mind waiting if he isn't wasting my time

Guy13 · Answer

Not long. Ought to be fairly clear after two months.

SnowedIn · Answer

This is a fabulous question. And tough to answer in terms of putting the words to thoughts. I selected A.

I think the answer on "emotionally interested" isn't long. I'm patient and all that and happy to let someone else be cautious, patient, etc., but there comes a point at which I don't want to invest anything more if it's not going anywhere. And by "going anywhere" I don't necessarily mean sexually. Where I'm struggling with your question is whether I'd assign some number of days/weeks/months to it. Probably not... I don't like those sorts of deadlines assigned to stuff like this. But... my gut tells me that I'd know after a month or two.

As far as sexually, that would develop, I think, organically through the process of emotionally interested -- if it wasn't an initial spark or explosion in the first place. Likewise hard to put a number to but probably the same as whatever duration I put on the emotionally interested.

Jamie05rhs · Answer

It's all a game of chance, basically. (Though I hate to use the word "game" because that sounds really bad.) Basically what I mean is, if I like someone, I will TRY. I will give it my best shot. I will make my intentions known. But if they are being dodgy and not really responding to my efforts, then I will keep my options open and start looking elsewhere. Even if I do love them. Because, at the end of the day, unrequited love is still meaningless.
... So, when I say it's a game of chance, that refers to whether or not she will come around and actually decide that she likes me before I officially start dating some other girl.

Brutus977 · Answer

A woman knows within five minutes whether or not she'd sleep with you. It may take a while for her to act on it. But if she gives you her number she's already gone through her primordial checklist of biological cues she looks for. The rest is up to you. As for guys it's a yes/no within 10 seconds. I'll walk through the grocery or mall and ping yes/or no as I stroll along.

Price511 · Answer

While I would prefer to know more sooner than later, I have actually waited for somebody for 3 years before we actually got into a relationship. We disconnected for a little bit because of one reason or another for a short while and I also dated inbetween then and when it happened, so take my words with a grain of salt, but my feelings flooded right back once they came into my life again.

Juxtapose · Answer

I am definitely not waiting a full year to let an indecisive woman communicate her feelings to me lol. She's either into me within the first few minutes of meeting me or she's not going to be into me at all, that's just how it is. You subconsciously decide if you're into somebody veeeeerrry quickly.

dustybiker · Answer

I asked within 12-13 hours I think it was. I didn’t want to mess around if I liked him and he didn’t have the same feelings in reverse. I jumped in or walked away. No messing around.

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

I want to leave things in her hands when she tells me that she's ready, but I do believe in marriage first, then sex.

SphynxUK · Answer

I can usually tell right away if someone in interested in getting to know me, or is wanting to sleep with me. I’m all for being frank and honest and I’ll ask I’m not sure.

Sevenpointfive · Answer

i know immediately if i'm sexually attracted to someone. emotionally in a month to three. so if i haven't gotten their attention by then i move on

Anonymous · Answer

I'm not sure how you mean that. Because I wouldn't be in love with her unless I feel she had some sort of sexual attraction to me. I mean sexual attraction is kind of the dividing line between friend and more.

humanearth · Answer

Look, I'm going to sound like a PIG, but But sooner the better, I'm not the type to wait around to find out.

YourFavoriteFriend · Answer

One year? LMAO! If she's not a virgin, 3 weeks at best.

BoobMan · Answer

More than a YEAR? Are you KIDDING me Vivant? lol! It most definitely shouldn't take a year for either one of those things!

MysticDevice · Answer

I think I'd like to know sooner than later. But with a little bit of time for the mystery to manifest

Andres77 · Answer

I’d only give it a few months, tops…and it also depends on where I’m hoping the relationship goes

exitseven · Answer

I do not have a lot of time to waste so I say less than 1 year.

pizzalovershouse · Answer

I take both slowly an take time in relationships to get to know some one awhile after seeing them before sex

Shark_61695 · Answer

I guess I'd mostly be interested in an emotional connection and a year is too long.

Philyouup · Answer

I’m a sexual person. I am older so i know what i want in my lover.

How long would you wait to find out your love interest is emotionally interested in you? Sexually?

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