How long does it take for you to know whether or not you want something serious with someone?

[beebella]

I watched a video last night where this guy was saying that guys know what they want from a woman within the first 15 minutes of meeting them.
I don't remember the guy's name, so I can't find the video, but it was in response to a clip of a podcast where these girls were saying they think guys don't know whether or not they want a serious relationship with you until after about a month or two.

Guys, are either of these true for you? Does it just depend?

Within the first 15 minutes

Within the first month or two

It takes longer than a month or two

It just depends

[NathanDavis]

it really depends on what anyone means as "something serious"I am always serious, lol...

- it can take me just 15 seconds... to know if I am seriously intrigued by someone I just me or noticed

- it can take me just 15 minutes... to know if I am seriously interested in finding out more about this someone...

- it can take me 15 days... of getting to know this someone to seriously consider going out with her way more often knowing very well that I would want to be in a serious relationship with her...

- and then it could take me 15 months... to seriously consider along with her... if we could maybe take it to the next level which would be something like living together, or marriage or any other longer-lasting relationship

and these figures are not all exact, just an estimate because every person and every circumstance is a little bit different from one another, so it could be a bit more or a bit less... and sometimes way faster or slower, it all depends... lol

[OlderAndWiser]

I am engaged now, so my answer is based on previous dating experience. I usually knew, by the end of the third or fourth date, whether I had a potential LTR in the future with a lady. Yes, I might discover red flags and warning signs later, but I would generally ask to date exclusively by the third or fourth date.

[Anonymous]

There's a truth in all of these answers.
Sometimes I meet someone and instantly feel a connection I wouldn't want to go away. Maybe even feel romantically attracted to them.
Sometimes I meet someone and only become attracted to them after months of spending time together.
And often, although I haven't experienced this, people know one another for years before they start to develop feelings.
It's all possible. There's no right or wrong in this.
What I do think is that it depends on where and how you meet them. If you're going on a first date with someone you met in the internet, that'll definitely be a different experience then hanging out with someone you've known for some time and start to feel attracted to.

[cnj421]

I hate this topic so much. There is no hard fast rule when it comes to relationships. Every human and every relationship is SO different. None of these people can tell you this answer for sure. So I would encourage you to stop searching for the “answer” online and start paying attention to what’s happening in real life. Are they giving you the signs they’re interested? How does it feel? How can you let go of your fear and trying to control the outcome and just allow things to unfold as they should?

[coachTanthony]

I would say right away you know but just because you know doesn't mean anything. You now have to vet the person accordingly and not skim over red flags which many can't do. They just see muscles tattoos and blue eyes and are blinded to the fact they make minimum wage signing up customers at the local Gold's Gym with no future direction or goals in their life.

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

That’s probably why they end up being hurt, you can’t decide that in 15 minutes..

[Kaneki05]

A year cause anything before that can be clouded by lust.
And whoever say's 15mins is an idiot. It's okay to want someone within 15mins but to say you are fully in depth and knowledge of all the aspects of that said person within those 15mins is dumb as hell.
It takes months for you to really add up the positive and negatives of been with said person. Once it has been year I think then one can confidently say they are 100% in staying with that person and if they can't well that's your answer this one ain't for you.

[MasseurDeMojo]

Just like every woman is different; so is every man. There are some cases where a person just clicked, and they knew they were the one. A lot of times the man may want to get to know the woman's thoughts, and get a good idea of her personality; this could take anywhere from a week to several months.

You also have situations where the two have grownup going to the same school, and have generally done things while growing up. Only later to find that they really want to be with each other permanently.

A lot of this hinges on how they were brought up, and the environment they lived. Bottom line: Every situation is going to be different when it comes to when a man knows, that she is the one!!!

[Effably]

All of the above.

I'll know within a second what I might want from you, or any other girl. After 15 minutes I will have an excellent grasp on it that will generally hold true.

But the people that matter the most to us tend to be exceptions to the normal rules. A month in, three months in, we might have changed. I might have discovered something I missed. Circumstances could be different. And suddenly what I want changes too.

So yes. We will know within 15 minutes. But that is always subject to change.

[Joshydavid25]

I honestly don't know how long it takes me. Some guys can just see a woman and know right away that they wanna marry her. It's usually based on her outer appearance.. We gotta understand that "dating" is a more recent phenomenon, and it's mainly in the West where we have the "pleasure" of vetting people and taking our sweet time getting into a serious relationship.. So in the past when a man saw a woman that looked pleasing to his eye more likely than not he would ask to marry her..

[wolfcat87]

Men don't know in the first 15 minutes and neither do women. We know if there's an initial attraction and get a first impression. I know within the first 2 weeks of heavy talking if a man is long term material that's right for me. If a man isn't very interested in the first 2 weeks that you really start talking, he's not that interested in anything non casual either.

[madhatters4]

i voted B but it's more of an average. i've been with girls where it took a while for me to actually realize something serious might be there. i've realized this feeling on the first date.

for example... i knew on the first date that i was way into my wife and something serious would come of it.

i've had it be within the first week or two

i've had it take months

[IslaTheWitch]

Sometimes you feel it after 2-3 meetings. I don't believe the first impression. It could be very wrong.

I like to know the person and learn some deeper things. What makes him laugh? What does he think? What does he like?

I think I would need a few weeks to be sure.

[nastyb]

I'm gonna say this as an experienced dater, you absolutely will not know someone within the first 15 minutes of talking to them. You might get a good glimpse of how their personality matches with yours. But, I can confidently say that a woman with a fun personality is not what will sustain a forever marriage. Compatibility is the key to a successful marriage. Passion dies, incompatibility will never die

[SotiCoto]

Back in the days when I still did relationships, I was always in it for keeps, and whether they wanted that or not was up to them. It never worked out. Never made it past the first couple of years. Eventually I just gave up trying and decided I'd rather just die alone than keep sinking myself into failed relationships.

[Stefan181]

I would say I develope an interest in the first few minutes of meeting someone new and having a random conversation, but past experiences taught me that it takes time for the real person to show themselves sometimes
So maybe a month or so to actually developed real feelings

[NZGirl07]

I've only ever had long term relationships. For me as soon as I'm romantically interested in someone I know I want it to be long term. I've never considered relationships as something casual.

Obviously if things start to go wrong you have to reconsider, but my mindset is always serious.

[SunnyRS]

I think it takes some time to get to know someone so at least about a month or so. But this month should be before we go out to date or start dating.
Cause if I ask you out I am looking for something serious it might not work out but at least I know what I am looking for.

[kitsachie]

At this point of my life, if I'm talking to someone in a romantic sense, I see potential in a relationship. It's as I get to know the person is when I learn that they're not going to be good for me, so it depends.

[JacobJordan]

I knew within 15 minutes because I made a joke and my now wife responded with a joke of her own. Knew at that moment I wanted more. Wasn't sure how much but the outcome made it clear how much. Married and 3 kids

[YesterdaysChild]

At least a couple of dates. You both may be reserved on the first date. Follow-up dates will reveal more. But it might take a month of dating to get the gist of if it can go further or not.

[dolemite58]

i think you know right away if a girl is more girlfriend material or just a hook up but i’d say it probably takes a month or more to see how she behaves, with all the dating apps and what not girls are more into being casual now a days and it’s harder to tell if they’re sincere about wanting to be serious tbh

[TadCurious]

Bella I can be really attracted in the first 15 minutes but that's way to soon for me to know that I want a serious relationship with them. It would take me getting to know them better in terms of what they're like on the inside.
😊🙋‍♂️

[Monalisa77]

Disagree, the guy i like atm didn't start flirting with me till 4 months after i met them, unless they secretly liked me then (which i highly doubt it)