Is it bad to kiss a gitl on the first date?

[Weapon77]

Is it better to wait? What if she already hugged you when the date started?

[musicbrain5]

Kissing on the first date is fine, but both people have to want it of course. I would never ever go farther than that though.

[Weapon77]

Makes sense. But how do you know it's a good idea? And how to avoid STIs?

[musicbrain5]

You’ll know if it’s a good idea if the date goes really well. You have good conversation, you’ve enjoyed the time together, if she is making tons of eye contact with you and open to a little bit of physical touch (like hand holding or just being super close to you). And also if she leans in to hear what you’re saying - again she’s getting close to you and not backing away. These days, you would not be remiss by asking her if you can kiss her, either. At least then you will have your answer.

How to avoid STIs? Well kissing is pretty low risk, and even more so if you just do a simple peck with lips only. It is possible to spread cold sores so don’t kiss her if she has one. Also, don’t have sex or do anything with genitals until both of you have tested and shown each other the results, seriously.

[Weapon77]

Just paranoid about kissing spreading something, but yeah it's pretty low probability if I don't choose nasty gals 😅

[musicbrain5]

Well germs will spread one way or another, whether through simple hand holding or full on sex haha.

[Weapon77]

True, but I can't get herpes from hand holding, if that makes sense

[musicbrain5]

Honestly you probably have a higher chance of catching something from a toilet seat than from kissing someone. Don’t go on a date with anyone who you think is “nasty” lol

[Anonymous]

To be honest, I'd worry where her mouth had been. In today's culture, a mere kiss is now dangerous... but each to their own.

[Weapon77]

That's how I feel. So at what point can I assume her mouth is safe? And how many before she'd just be insulted that I hadn't kissed her?

[Opinion Owner]

Nothing is more important than our health. With an abundance based mindset and health being a priority, one shouldn't concern themselves about her being insulted. It should be her priority as well. There are other new risks many aren't aware of either.

At the very least you'd need to get to know her dental routine, a bit about her past and lifestyle. As for the time scale, I've no idea.

Look at the pink saying she'd be fine being kissed on the first date. I know a girl that now has painful cold-sores for life and her body reacts to them terribly causing her mouth to swell up like balloons.

[Weapon77]

Exactly. It's not as much of a risk when people are in middle school or starting high school, I suppose, but especially during college age and after it is a huge risk. It makes me extremely paranoid and not want to date at all. I guess I'd feel comfortable if I found a virgin, but it's still unnerving to think I could get herpes or some shit from one misstep

[Opinion Owner]

I notice in another comment that you said 'it's pretty low probability if I don't choose nasty gals'. I remember this girl I was interested in but I'm never in a rush. Due to her looking quite nice, youthful and reasonably fit a lot of the guys were saying 'If that were me I would have already gone for her!'. Then a few months later I discover she was messing around with some casual sex after a breakup and off sick due to 'sores on her lip'. Then one day I saw her with 6 cold sores on her lip...

[Weapon77]

Oh shit dude! That's crazy

[NathanDavis]

if you're thinking about on you own... it is really bad

let things happen genuinely instead

[Weapon77]

No idea how to do that. But I've only been on a date with one girl I actually wanted to kiss. I never really wanted to kiss any of the others I've gone out with

[NathanDavis]

then do not rush onto things... if you lack experience

she has to be the one wanting to kiss you in the first place

[Weapon77]

Yeah, the only time I know for sure that was the case (it was my ex), she just planted one on me since I didn't notice anything lmao

[NathanDavis]

that is safer

by the way, you should go there and focus on giving her a great time

and not be thinking if you can kiss her or not

[Weapon77]

Of course. That would be stupid to go there thinking that. It's after I've gone out with someone that I start thinking about what I might shouldve done or not done. I've been on a few dates over the years and never felt like kissing any of them. I wanted to get to know them better. But they all ended up losing interest, so I just worry about not finding anyone who won't think I'm rejecting them

[Summeroflove]

This really depends on how well the date is going.

[trina_x]

i don't mind being kissed on a first date

[Weapon77]

So basically, you wouldn't agree to a date with someone unless you'd be fine with them trying a kiss, right?

I assume it depends on if the date went well or hot though haha

[trina_x]

yea pretty much