Should I ask him out or is it better not to?

[Anonymous]

Hey! Im in university and there is one course every second week where we are divided into groups and older students teach us. In my group we have this cute guy who is a few years older than and i really like him. I always look at him and think to myself that he could be the one, but of course i dont know everything about him and i for sure overreact. Bit still i thought about asking him out maybe after lesson since i like him so mich or is this very embarrassing and i dhould rather not?
just ask him if he once wants to meet me for a drink?

but i dont want others to hear how i ask him out or others talk about i think it could be cringe

and also i can't imagine how he would react!

[wheist9095]

Well, if you want to pursue anything with him you're gonna have to make the first move because as the older student who is working with the school he is probably pretty closely watched for any favoritism or possible sexual harassment that could happen.

If you hit him up with a," hey do you have Instagram/Snapchat/whatever", you could see if he's interested enough to give it to you and start talking to him there after hours. If he doesn't have anything, or at least says he doesn't, that means he's not that into you and it's best to move on and find someone else ya know?

[Asker]

He doesn't has any social media, thats why i wanted to ask hin to meet me up for a drink.

[wheist9095]

If he doesn't have any social media then yeah, give it one shot. Just ask him if he wants to grab coffee with you sometime. Coffee is a safe way to go since it's low pressure and there's no expectations about the after.

[Asker]

Is it very obvious that i like him when i ask this?

[wheist9095]

Yeah, but like is a very subjective term. So you asking him out for coffee, to everyone else, only means that you find him attractive. Nobody but you will know how much or what you like about him ya know?

[Asker]

But is it ok after all he was my tutor who taught me? I can't imagine how he would react amd i dont even think he likes me i dont know wouldn't it be weird?

[wheist9095]

I think it would be fine if he is just a tutor and not someone with any academic power over you. And you'll never know how they'll react until you take the jump and find out

[TadCurious]

I think it's perfectly okay for you to ask him. And I also understand that it can be scary to do that. Perhaps you could frame it as talking about the course you're both taking. I don't think it's cringey at all. But I realize it might feel that way if he declines. That's what guys have had to deal with for. . . forever. Lol.
If the embarrassment is just too much perhaps you could wait until the end of the term.

[Reece12345]

I think he'll be flattered if you ask him. Is say go for it.

A drink sounds like a cool idea... you guys can just chill and get to know each other... and then take it from there in any way you'd prefer.

[slatyb]

Hey, <insert name>, have a minute? Get him to step away and then invite him to lunch or coffee or whatever. Many men your age are quite shy. He may be crushing on you too.

[Asker]

Why would he vrush on me as well?

[slatyb]

I don't know, but it happens. At your age a lovely young woman showed every sign of being interested in getting closer, but I was clueless.

[Summeroflove]

I think you should!!!

[Asker]

Why lol?

[Summeroflove]

Asked, well you’re attracted to him. Lol. You wouldn’t want him to start to fancy someone else or assume you’re not into him or another girl ask him.

[Asker]

Yeah true

Bit im so worried it woudl tun out cringe or he would reject me

I really dont know if he would ever like me

[Summeroflove]

That’s the hard part. There is always that risk of rejection.

If you look at it my way number one it will give you closure and number two even worst case scenario is you’re rejected. Now you’re not sitting around waiting on a guy who isn’t even into you and probably never would have approached anyways.

On the other side you really don’t know. He could say yes