Why do women always lose interest in me after I become committed in the relationship?

[Anonymous]

Paradoxically, the women I've been with claimed they were demisexual and they liked having sex with me because they felt a very strong emotional connection. However, why did they sleep with me three times a day in the first months of the relationship when I was not committed and didn't want to have sex anymore after 2-3 of committed relationship? Do I pick the wrong women? Are they not mature enough?

[Zbrody1997]

I’m almost convinced that’s all women but only because my experiences

[Anonymous]

How do you feel you behave in a committed relationship vs being single?

[Asker]

When I am single, until I fall in love with someone, I am very cool and detached. Then I become serious and invested. Sometimes I talk to multiple women at the same time. I've had an ex tell me: "You seemed to be a chad who breaks hearts at first. You seemed to be more muscular." I've had another ex tell me: "The beginning was the peak of our relationship and after that we only went down...".

[Asker]

I think the contrast between me single and me in a relationship is too huge. At first I don't care and I seem to be a chad and then I fall in love and I fall hard and I become the family guy.

[Opinion Owner]

Gotcha. Well while part of me thinks the honeymoon phase thing may come into play given how short your relationships seem to be, I also wonder if women aren’t getting the true version of you. The contrast, as you say. Maybe if you’re consistently the same from start to finish there won’t be such a vast difference in what the woman is getting. The sort of woman you pick could make a difference as well. Personally I’d say to find someone who aligns best with the sort of woman you want to grow with and the lifestyle you plan to lead. I know that for me, I thought I had a type until I really paid attention to what I wanted for myself going forward, then I became much more particular.

[Asker]

That's the true version of myself when I am not committed. But as soon as I catch stronger feelings, I become much different. I don't commit at first until I get to know that woman well enough. My relationships are not that short, most of them are over 2-3 years long.

[Opinion Owner]

Ohh okay, when you put they’d lose interest after 2-3 months I just assumed that’s how long these relationships were lasting and in my mind that made sense, since honeymooning is about that span of time. But now that you’re saying it’s a few years long, I don’t believe that’s the case. What I do think may have happened is that over time their sex drive wasn’t matching yours. 3 times a day can be fun and exciting in the beginning as many other things are, but after a while how willing they are to do it lessens, but that has nothing to do with being disinterested in you. Unless there’s other more suggestive details that weren’t mentioned, not having constant sexy to me makes sense.

[Asker]

My sex drive was not that high, most of the times I wanted sex was because I craved intimacy and closeness. Once in a few weeks is fine for me in a long-term relationship. The problem is that I felt that they were withholding it or were not into it anymore. The reasons they invoked were not feeling appreciated and not feeling a strong emotional connection. This is weird to me, cause I appreciate my girlfriends more as time passes and I am more emotional in the relationship. At first I just don't care and they think we have an emotional connection.

[Ryfyle]

You need to work on your dick game.