How to tell a guy you aren't interested without telling him you aren't interested?

[Anonymous]

I don't want to make things awkward since we work together and he hasn't outright asked me out but I know he will one day.

[SnowedIn]

First, do nothing. If he hasn't done or said anything you could be creating drama and awkward where none exists right now.

Second, you don't actually know that he'll ask you.

Finally, be honest. This "tell them without telling them" is one of the reasons that guys and girls talk past each other. Be clear and honest and polite and direct. You're not obligated to return his affections if he communicates them.

But, again, in the meantime do nothing.

[Asker]

If he asks for my number am I safe to say he's interested?

[SnowedIn]

Unless it's being added to a all roster or something like that, yeah. :)

[Orion76]

@Mybeachlufe8888 apologies if that wasn’t about my advice I can’t tell what is what in this app. Have a great day

[SnowedIn]

@Orion76 ... I think you meant to post this down where you were talking to Mybeachlife8888?

[Orion76]

Apologies

[SnowedIn]

@Orion76 ... no worries at all! :) Was just letting you know so you could reply to them directly.

[Orion76]

Come in one day and act excited saying “guess what I’m going on a date this evening” that tells him you think of him as a good friend and that dating him wasn’t something you considered or thought he did.

[Asker]

This is perfect thank you! What if there is another different guy I work with that I do like? Will that get out?

[Orion76]

Oh yeah work dynamics everything gets out you’d be surprised. What you can do instead is act annoyed that a girlfriend is trying to get you to go on a date saying I’m really not ready to date anyone right now. That you can undo anytime if you want to. Lol

[Asker]

Ok cool! Thank you so much! I really appreciate you helping me out ☺️😘 cheers

[Orion76]

Word of advice though dating within the work environment is not for everyone and is very problematic believe me.

[Orion76]

Best of luck cheers

[Mybeachlife8888]

I don’t like this method, this is bad advice If you ask me. The best thing to do is to just be upfront with the guy and let him know you’re not interested. A) you’re assuming he likes you which might be true….. B) if he is showing interest, it’s not a bad thing. C) he may never ask you out, but if he does… that’s when you need to be honest with him. Just tell him you’re interested in someone else and you’re sorry. It’s as easy as that. You can even go as far as to tell him you’re not interested in him that way if he’s being difficult and not getting the hint.

This is something that women complicate so much. You think beating around the bush is being nice but it’s the complete opposite. Put yourself in his shoes, would you want a guy leaving you feeling like another time might be worth waiting for to date him if he genuinely would never date you? It’s always best to completely honest in these situations. Grow some courage to be honest with him when the time comes.

[Asker]

True yeah I should stay away from dating coworkers

[Orion76]

@Mybeachlufe8888 how is it bad advice to make it known she isn’t ready to date anyone? How can you be upfront with someone you think he might ask you out. You can’t just go to the guy hey I know you like me and you probably gonna ask me out at some point I’m just being upfront here don’t?

[Belgie]

It is not perfect because it does not communicate that YOU ARE NOT INTERESTED IN DATING HIM. The poor sap might still be interested and bide his time.

[Orion76]

If i was the guy and i over heard her saying im not interested in dating in this time i would say to myself im so glad i didn't say anything and disregard the idea noone gets hurt why everyone wants to corner the he didn't ask yet everyone is saying to tell him? lol

[Monalisa77]

Thats y i dont understand y my crush didn't do this

[SexyRedd1966]

Just tell him you don't date coworkers it's not a good idea anyway because if it doesn't work out then you have to see this person all the time some companies actually have a rule that you can't do that

[kylee2437]

I think the best way is to just be honest tbh. It won’t make things awkward , it shows you are direct.

[abc3643]

Talk about your boyfriend - whether you have one or not.
For instance, the NFL playoffs are going on. Which team does your (fictitious?) boyfriend want to win the Superbowl?

Stuff like that.
What you are signaling is that you are unavailable.
He'll back off a bit then - or at least maintain a professional distance.

[Vikkrram]

But ma'am how you know that he likes you? If he Haven't told it to you?

[Asker]

I know and I have never been wrong. But basically I caught him checking me out. I mean literally staring at my butt, up and down and he's done it more than once. Every time I'm near him he keeps asking me questions about myself and laughing at my lame jokes, and being really nice. Another thing sometimes he blushes, I think he get nervous around me.

[Crankor]

It will be more awkward assuming you've made your point without the guy really knowing. That said, your response depends on how obvious it is that he's flirting or what not. Could talk about another guy you like in front of him. That would give a good idea what he's thinking.

[FilmGuy93]

Start telling him about other men in your life, mention the boyfriend/guy you've started seeing.

[MrCommodore]

Openly friendzone him, chat about other guys you like and try to set him up with other girls. Call him friend a lot. Eventually he will start to get the hint

[magiusX26]

honestly, you dont. either you say it or you wind up with either guy likely following you around thinking he is just friendzoned or you lead him on.

[Anonymous]

He's a guy. You need to use actual WORDS. As a guy he's probably well used to rejection. Just be blunt and clear and verbal. He'll be fine.

[JPresidente]

You gotta have the talk and try the ole “It’s not you , it’s me.”

[Haha456]

Just say you have a boyfriend or are married. Better to say you're married. It works for me all the time.

[D_Bone_Steak]

That's some female shit... there is only one way to tell a guy you're not interested... fucking tell him.

[Dav1dTh0ma389]

It depends really but, honestly, you just need to tell him. Otherwise if you ignore him, he'll just think you're playing hard to get

[Zbrody1997]

Just tell him men prefer to know so we can forget you exist and move on to someone who might be interested.

[WhitneySnow]

Wait till he asks you out, then tell him straight up. It’s the best way.

[es20490446e]

If I was in such situation I would say:

"Sorry, but that's something I don't really want to do"

[Craig67654]

What field is this in?

[Asker]

We work at a restaurant. I'm a chef and the guy that likes me washes dishes.

[Craig67654]

I would just wait at this point. If he does ask you out, just say that you're currently talking to someone else

[Asker]

I like this, this is a good idea. I was actually thinking on doing this if it would be nicer. If he asked for my number I'll give it to him and if he asks me to hangout I'll act dumb be like "As friends? Sorry I got to make sure because I am already talking to someone and I want to be respectful to him." I don't know if that would be me jumping the gun by saying "as friends" I feel like guys can ask you out but make it sound so casual like you guys are just friends though. It's confusing because most girls are down to have a guy friend but little do they know this guy is lying. Lol yea...

[In_Trance]

you don't want to make things awkward, but you won't say exactly how you feel...


right

[Asker]

⁉️😕😵

[spartan55]

"he hasn't outright asked me out, but I know he will one day"...😂 and how you know this how? Getting a little ahead of yourself aren't you?

[Asker]

Girl friend I just know 👀I guess you can't tell when someone is into/likes you?

[spartan55]

Yeah, but it's also possible to misread the whole situation too.

[Asker]

Hm it's different for guys. You don't have women running after you often.

[spartan55]

I don't understand what point you are trying to make?

[Asker]

Don't you worry about it.

[spartan55]

In other words there is point...😂 😂 😂

[spartan55]

*no point

[Asker]

Girl friend I'm not going to argue with some random old dude. God be with you

[Asker]

Oh shit sorry I didn't mean for that to come off rude. I know you are trying to get a reaction from me. Go ahead I deserve it. I will pray for you ❤️ god be with you ☺️

[spartan55]

A reaction? ... yeah, don't think so. Just admit your bag is empty... 😂

[Asker]

I love you too♥️

[KathrynTaylor]

You say he’s like a brother to you

[jshm2]

You're flattering yourself. He isn't interested, and is likely just keeping you around to further his career. Not because he likes you.

[Asker]

I guess your dating life was eventful

[spartan55]

What does the dating life of the opinion owner have to do with anything? Or you? Nothing.

[Asker]

@spartan55 I'll just stop while I'm ahead. I'm not looking to have fights with random older men

[spartan55]

Translation: I will never admit I am wrong, so I'll just pull the plug early. 👍

[Asker]

@spartan55 actually I am wrong. I'm religious and it isn't right to start fights. I'm sincerely sorry. I want to be a good Christian

[spartan55]

Now this is starting to make sense... 😂

[Mediterraneansoul]

Give it time. He'll find someone else better

[Asker]

😭 you expect me to take every guy that comes my way? This guy probably just wants sex from me and what if I want a relationship? I'm trash just because I don't like him back? I'm trash because I have preferences?

[spartan55]

"he probably just wants sex" 😂 😂 could you have any more assumptions here? Just amazing.

[Mediterraneansoul]

Hence why I Said give it time. There is someone for everyone. No shortages

[Fryday_Knight]

Just keep things professional at all times.

[Heolurt]

Just tell him quit being a wimp about it.

[LiamJHayden]

Just casually mention your new boyfriend.