Is the guy no longer interested in me?

[Anonymous]

I met this guy on Hinge. We went out twice , the way he talked to me in person or in text really felt as if the guy is interested in me but after the 2nd date , I could sense an energy shift from his side, he is not available anymore like he was between the 1st and 2nd date (The second date was 3 days after the 1st date ) Though he had mentioned he has a hectic work schedule so I gave him a benefit of doubt that maybe he is busy and even tried talking to him about this but he said I am overthiking and I shouldn't worry about it but still I feel he is just keeping me hanging, I don't know I am just very confused.

[SueShe]

Whatever this "Hinge" is, I presume that it must be one of those online dating sites where people primarily go, not to date, but to try to get intimate as quickly as possible with the people that fall for it.

I presume that you did not give him what he had expected and that he lost interest in you. Seeing that he could get you where he wanted after the first date, he gave the excuse that he was busy rather than to be honest with you and telling you that you did not meet his expectations.

No, the guy is no longer interested in you and if you are interested in a long term relationship rather than a short quicky, then all those dating platforms are the wrong place to find what you are seeking for.

You are definitely not overthinking the entire situation. He may want to keep you warm, just in case he cannot find a substitute. Time to let go.

[BarryLiverstone]

But they went on a 2nd date and they didn’t have sex. So if he just wanted sex why tell her to move on?

[SueShe]

@BarryLiverstone Because most guys are dating just for that sole purpose and if they don't get what they are after, the second date is also the last one. That is why she should move on.

[BarryLiverstone]

Seems like a very pessimistic viewpoint of guys who want to find romantic relationships. If most only want sex then I wonder how so many people end up getting married and having children? That’s why I’m asking

[Guy13]

when I am overwhelmed with something, I back away rather than rush into things unnecessarily.
It seems like he has more important commitments than you pressing at this moment. I would not count on hearing from him. Sorry.

[AydenHazor]

Your instincts are likely right. There's a good chance he connected with someone else in the site too and is keeping you hanging in case they don't work out. If you're feeling like things have changed, they probably have

[BarryLiverstone]

What did you all do on the dates and did you schedule date 3?

[Asker]

We went out to a bar, the conversation was amazing and the guy himself mentioned that he likes me and he wants to see me again. There was a lot of comfort between us. So the sudden shift in the energy felt weird

[BarryLiverstone]

Did you have sex or any physical contact?

[Asker]

we made out but didn't have sex

[BarryLiverstone]

Sounds like there is chemistry then. As he said work is hectic as it’s the middle of the week. You shouldn’t expect the same level of energy as when he was first talking to you as you have been on two dates. When do you expect to see him again?

[Asker]

In the weekend probably , let's see.

[BarryLiverstone]

That’s right. So until then you can focus on your life and either suggest a place to meet or follow up with him in a few days. Are you concerned something happened on date 2 ?

[Asker]

Actually yes, I was sloshed so I fear I must have said something embarassing or weird to him.

[BarryLiverstone]

Oh I thought you went to a bar on the first date

[Asker]

Yeah for the second date we went to a restuarant but we drank there as well

[BarryLiverstone]

Then that wouldn’t be a reason for him to stop seeing you because you both were drinking. I know how you feel tho; Friday night I hosted a poker game at my house and may have said weird things when drunk.. but luckily was with friends who knew me

[BarryLiverstone]

Thankfully my buddy texted Monday : “Thank you for hosting. I enjoyed hearing you laugh so much 😊”

[Asker]

Indeed you are lucky , can't say the same for myself though but thank you anyway for finding the time to share your opinion. Thank you

[BarryLiverstone]

You are welcome. Overall I’d say don’t give up on him. If you like him then follow up and let him know you want to see him again. Get used to ebbs and flows in energy as the weeks flow. Good luck

[Asker]

Thank you again.

[noohair]

Men date for different reasons then women. This seems to be what you are dealing with.

[Iron_Man]

Talk to the guy

[In_Trance]

No he isn't