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Is it normal for a male coworker with potentially autism to ask out every girl at work and even keep hitting on a married woman? He recently asked me out and texts me daily but I’m not sure if he’s serious
Does anyone have advice for a dating a guy who’s mentally handicapped?
Anonymous
(36-45) 
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
3Opinion
People with autism have a really hard time understanding social cues, courtesies and boundaries.
I would say he's a weirdo, but since you mentioned he's on the spectrum, I'd say he's trying to get a girlfriend and doesn't understand that what he's doing isn't normal.
I can kinda forgive the asking every woman in sight out because he’s also been rejected by them all and because of the possible autism. The thing that annoys me is the fact he’s hit on my married coworker o_O and tries to text her daily… she told me that he texts way too much and she doesn’t respond anymore. Lmao.
I like his eyes lol so it’s redeeming him a bit
😂 yeah that's pretty typical for the "atypical".
I work with people with more extreme cases of autism, and they want what they want. They don't understand why they can't have it unless it's thoroughly explained to them why they can't have it. They don't understand hints, subtle cues, and facial expressions.
They can also be really interesting and bright people when you get to know them though.
With his dreamy eyes and hopefully good personality, he might be worth giving a chance!
But that's up to you
Thank you. Lol. It’s kind of like they’re in a different world almost.
Oh they are! For sure lol
Gotta love em though
No problem
I bet he would he thrilled to go on a date at all. I have worked with spectrum clients, youth and adults, and as you say, very difficult for them to date unless almost unnoticeable traits. That you would like todate him is the important part, focus on that. Just remember to he understanding if he gets nervous or unfamiliar to your sense of normal. You sound like a great person, I am sure it would be his honour to go on a date. Might I suggest something midway? Lunch on a Saturday?
@Heterosketero thank you! You are suggesting lunch to me? Lol
Oh no, I likely live thousands of miles away. He might het cold feet with a really datey date, so a picnic or something lowkey in the day migut be a good place to start. Not tonsay Ibwould not ask, I just have no idea who you are. I am a 43 year old man in the arctic, you are 35ish year old person of mystery.
Sorry for the typos, we get internet by data, not speed.
@Heterosketero he actually already asked me out lol to a movie but it was too soon and I didn’t feel comfortable so I said I wasn’t sure yet. I also am not sure about a movie date because how can you get to know each other in the dark and what if he thinks it’s a chance to like grab me or kiss me (it is just too soon).
The arctic? That’s very cool!
I like the idea of a date that isn’t too datey as well because I’m quite shy and inexperienced. Thanks.
Same here, thats why I suggested it. You have a good time
Yeah, hard to get to know someone at a movie.
@Heterosketero I was worried he actually wants just sex or to touch me because of the movie thing.
If I can be honest, that is a possibility, actually why I suggested a different kind of date. That is a possibility with any guy, just because a dude is autistic doesn't mean he isn't thinking what anyone else is.
I once asked a girl to a movie and got exactly this back. She later told me that a couple dates before we got down is why she respected me.
@Heterosketero that’s interesting :) maybe I need to be more cautious with this guy then.
No more than any other man, except to consider, he may have very little dating experience, or even be a virgin. No more inclined to make out than anyone, but imagine your nervousness combined with his potential confusion. We often take for granted that we can coast on autopilot through most things, it is not so coear to everyone however. For example, if he asked everyone out, even a married woman, he may have the best intent but less of an abikiry to read the room if you catch my meaning. But without any of that to consider, it sounds like you would be interested in more of a date and movies may be what he considers a date, but he would probably be open to anything you could suggest just to be picked for a date at all. Especially, with someone he expressed interest in.
Smile and say I bet you say that to all the girls and see if he catches on :)
Yeah I don’t think he would respond to a joke I made. He’s like in another world o_O
Do you like him though? It may be worth just asking him out, I bet it would blow his mind and I bet it takes a lot to do that :) On a more serious note, how important is your work relationship, especially to him? It could be really hard for either of you to find other jobs if that got complicated. I have rarely dated a coworker for this reason, I quit my job once to ask out my coworker out, rejected :/
No harm in a date though, is there competition? Not if you ask first. Go get 'em Tiger
I believe in men asking women out on dates. I don’t see the harm in a date as long as he doesn’t expect premarital sex. I don’t have premarital sex so if he’s just asking out girls at work to get laid then I will be upset lol.
I like his eyes, he makes effort to be a gentleman and he is a generous man as well. He doesn’t seem like a angry crazy pants person either. If he is angry he isn’t taking it out on people at work.
Guys with autism just don't understand social morays or ques. You have to be direct with him.