Who should pay for dates if the woman is the rich one?

[Anonymous]

Always the woman

Most of the time the woman

Both equally

The man

[RavVid]

I think this is a difficulty in more than just dating. Lets suppose the woman is earning say 125K and the guy 50K and both can't keep their hands off each other. Now what really counts in life is your discretionary spending capability. That is the amount of money left over after essentials are paid - rent, electricity, food, minimum work clothing costs etc. Lets assume the woman either has purchased a house or isn't yet thinking of doing so. Assume that because everybody goes to the max when buying a house and has no discretionary $'s for maybe 10 years. Further assume about 40K is the minimum cost of a reasonable single life.

The woman has 85K and the guy has 10K of discretionary spending. He can afford dating... to a degree. Iflity the woman wants to go to upper end restaurants then guy is not able to keep up financially. If they go to a local pizzeria then he can keep up.

I have always been conscious that my discretionary dollars are not the girls discretionary dollars so if I like her I am quite happy to pay especially if it is me that wants to go high end. I work it that the girl pays when we go low end.

In other words we pay for dating according to our means. That's how I think it should be not entirely one or other or dead set 50/50. The guy in the hypothetical can't do 50/50 and in my life the girl can't do 50/50.

If you can't work this out in dating you will not work this out in a settled relationship. So why are you dating?

In reality this is an academic question because both guys and girls want relationships where the guy earns more. After the passion subsides in the hyp the girl is going to find a guy who earns the same or more than her.

Its that simple.

[Sunssong]

I think they should split it.

Now at some point it does show lack of tact, in my opinion, if they continue to split yet the man is poor and the woman is rich.

Each person is responsible to pay their own way HOWEVER I think it is tactless and shows a lack of courtesy if the rich person never ever, at any point of the relationship, decides to pay to full thing. The man should not expect the woman to pay for him and should always be prepared to pay his way.

Money allows for more freedom. If I'm with a girl that is lacking financially, I won't pay for her on the 1st date and maybe not even the 2nd or 3rd because I dont want her to get the wrong idea. But at some point I'm not going to let her lack of money undermine our freedom. Because we won't be able to do certain things due to her lack of money unless I pay. I'm not settling because of her lack of money. That's why I have money in the first place, so I can live more free.

[Sarahr123]

If I were like super rich like with at least a net worth of £60M+ that is steadily expanding then I don’t have a problem paying but I don’t want to get used so I would choose someone at least equally rich unless I knew them from childhood.

If I were just normal earning a high income like £130K+ per annum and still paying off a mortgage then I would go 50/50

If I were earning between £30K-100K per annum I would STILL go 50/50

If I were earning under 30K per annum I would only pay 20% of the time.

If I was not earning I would put off being with anyone until I became at least a bit stable because my conditioning is just that way as I was raised with no father so I always think of worst case scenarios and some sort of financial security/independence.

[JustMeL120]

Paying for the date isn't about money. It's about being dominant. That's if you want a submissive wife. If you don't want to pay for the date. Go find a wife more dominant but then don't complain your wife isn't Feminine and submissive. In the UK paying for the date is also good etiquette. I don't know about America.

[Asker]

I don't see anything about dominance in paying.

[Asker]

She orders whatever she wants he obeys and pays for whatever she orders.

[JustMeL120]

It's showing control of the situation and protection. Shows a man has his stuff together. It's definitely shows dominance. Maybe it's a European thing. I am not from America.

[Asker]

It's not control. She orders he obeys and pays. He can't run away and not to pay.
It is her whim and his responsibility.
I'm not from America either.

[JustMeL120]

Tbh I think the man paying for the date thing is a rich people thing. Because I live in London and the rich men I know don't have a problem paying for their dates even if the woman is richer.
Personaly every date I have ever had the man hasn't had a problem to pay for my date. I think it's bad etiquette to refuse a gift as well. So I just accept it. When I get to know the person better then I start paying my own things

[Asker]

I couldn't order anything if I knew he was gonna pay. It makes me uncomfortable.

[JustMeL120]

Depends on his income. If he's is rich 20 pounds for a pizza or a bowl of noodles is nothing. He probably makes that in his sleep. For a poor man who has that has to work 2 hours for this yes it's uncomfortable.

[Asker]

Sure.
I would be the one to pay if I was the rich one.

[JustMeL120]

I would let the man pay even if he is poor. So he doesn't feel inferior in anyway.

[Asker]

Ah got it. If it would make him feel inferior then I would let him pay for my glass of water.

[Sunssong]

@justmel120 You're not responsible for the way another person feels, thinks, or acts. Any man that feel inferior because of a rich woman paying needs to alter their conditioning. Basically classism

[JustMeL120]

@Sunssong true but if there are ways to boost someones confidence then it doesn't hurt to do it. If I was rich dating a poor man obviously If we got together I would help him get rich. But in the mean time it's not nice to hurt is ego for the sake of 20 pound

[JustMeL120]

And there is a difference with classism and snobbery.

[Asker]

It's not snobbery to want to be independant. My dignity doesn't allow me to let the man pay.

[JustMeL120]

To be honest food is cheap. all the time. Even a part time minimum wage worker can spare 20 pound of a meal for someone special. It's really not a big deal. Unless someone has serious financial problems or an addiction. In that case they might not be in a good place to start a relationship anyway.

[Asker]

There are expensive restaurants. A rich woman might want to go there to get her favorite food and drink. So who should pay then?

[JustMeL120]

I think the person who pays should pick the place. If you are from America I don't know how life is there but I was raised in Europe I lived in four different European country. And men paying for dates is the posh/ old fashion way of doing things. I think being posh is a big thing in France and England and it's not about to change. Here there are such things as etiquette and social classes and a man paying for a date for a woman is totally normal amongst the middle class. The working class also pay for the woman because it's still a big thing for them to work and the woman to look after the kids. Society is the way it is. And most people like it that way. Amongst young people things are different teenagers early 20s they are still too young to think about society and etiquette they just want to have fun.

[Asker]

He can pick the place but she gets to order what she wants. She might order too many things just to try new food. In short that can be expensive for the man.
It is stupid to force men to pay for women's whim.

[Asker]

Should the non rich man pay for the rich woman's food?

[JustMeL120]

The first date is like a projection of what the relationship will be like. Some men are poor but willing to sacrifice what ever money they have for the woman the like. Some men are rich but wouldn't spend a penny on someone else doesn't matter who it is and expect both to pay separately. So women are poor and are looking for a rich man and won't tolerate a man who doesn't pay for things. Some women are rich and expect a rich man to pay for the date. Some women a re poor and don't like the idea of anyone paying for them because they are empathetic. Some women are poor and not goldiggers but don't mind receiving a gift an find it normal that a man would pay 20 pound for a date. There are all sorts of people looking for all sorts of things. With all sorts of values and expection. Personally I don't think 20 is a lot of money and if a man isn't willing to sacrifice that on me then I wouldn't date them. In general it's men who are supposed to do the chasing not the opposite and paying for a date it's like buying a drink to a woman. It's generally the men who pay. At least on the first date.

[Asker]

He should chase me but if I agree to go on a date then we split the bill. I am willing to pay $20 for my own meal.
Buying a drunk is no different.

[JustMeL120]

To be honest I have been on many dates in the UK and the only times I split the bill with a guy. He turned out to be absolutely bonkers. He started telling me he was a secret agent. I definitely wouldn't date a guy who expects me to split the bill because there not gentleman like and not serious.

[Asker]

Lol I am your opposite.
I think if he insists to pay he has fake alpha complex. Treating me well makes him a gentleman. Paying for me is unnecessary.
Being generous is stupidity when it's one sided.

[JustMeL120]

I wouldn't say being generous is stupidity I think it's a man trying to make a good impression. If it was 500 pound a meal sushi bar I would understand but of he takes me to pizza express and spends 20 or 30 pound on a pizza for me I think it's a decent thing to do. Also I definitely wouldn't date a man who expects me to split the bill and has a cigarette at the end of the meal. I know for fact a packet of 20 in the UK I s about 20 pounds. If he rather sacrifice money for that that to offer me a date he clearly isn't worth it.

[Asker]

I mentioned when it's ONE SIDED.
I think when a woman wants to split it's a decent thing. It shows she's a worthy woman.

[JustMeL120]

To me it shows she has financial insecurities and doesn't trust theam can handle his finances. It also shows she feels that has that she isn't worth the man making small sacrifices such as 30 pound for her.. trust if men really want a woman they will be willing to spend way more than 30 pounds. I know some that spend 1000 to keep the one they like some even spent millions.

[Asker]

It depends on how you view it.
Paying for your own stuff shows maturity, and independance. It shows she wants him not for his money.
If a man should sacrifice his money for her what she should sacrifice for him?

[JustMeL120]

I see it from a European perspective here we view money differently. Also if a woman is a gold digger it's the responsibility of the man to spot it. A man who is stingy with his money isn't a good look. There is difference with expecting a man to value you by being willing to spend a bit on you and actually dating him entirely for his money. I am not asking the man to spend millions on me but definitely I think I am worth him spending 20 pound to take me on a date. To be honest I have been on many dates here on the UK and one in France. And the only time I split the bill was with that fake secret agent guy. I am not gonna lie and say there aren't women who are gold diggers but that the man's responsibility to spot them. You dont have to prove that you are a good person by paying for the date. You are worth him spending on you because you are worth fighting for. If he can't sacrifice 20 to date you he doesn't value you.

[Asker]

If a man should sacrifice his money for her what she should sacrifice for him?

[JustMeL120]

I don't think 30 is a huge sacrifice even for a poor person and of course the wam should sacrifice as well once they are officially together she will cook for him raise his kids. Look nice for him make him coffe make him food support him with his problems buy him gifts. but during the few first dates the man is still doing the chasing and it's his job to impress the girl.

[Asker]

It's not a huge sacrifice for sure.
My issue is when a woman expects him to pay but doesn't clean or cook for him.
It's all should be mutual.

[JustMeL120]

Nobody ows anyone anything. If the guy really likes a woman he will pay for the first date, he will pay for the second date and however many date it takes to conquer her. If not then he probably doesn't really like her. As for cleaning and cooking women don't have to do this. It's not a legal requirement. And men should expect it. if I go in a date and a guy asks me can we go half I will probably pay but I won't go on a second date.

[Asker]

True, men don't owe women anything.

It's not about conquering women. It's about getting to know each other and see if they get along well.
A woman should also show that she is worthy. She should prove she can offer the things he is interested in. Otherwise she is a total waste of money and time.

[JustMeL120]

At the end of the day there is no right or wrong people have different standard s and experience and also in London and Paris where I have been on dates in the past it hardly ever happens that men don't pay. Actually practically never. Apart from that man who pretended to be a detective.

[Asker]

Yes. That is why I would like to discuss that topic before going on a date. I'll let him know I will want to pay for myself.

[JustMeL120]

It's your life you do what you want. But from what I know men dont like to make a fuss over small things. They just want to have a pretty woman eating in front of them and they can kiss or talk with after there meal. If you start makig a fuss about 20 pounds they might lose interest. I am just being honest.

[Asker]

I won't make a fuss. I will tell him I support splitting the check before we even go on a date.

[Summeroflove]

Neither person is entitled to free stuff and if someone dated someone for their money alone. That’s a shame.

[Effably]

Initially? They pay equally. If the person inviting the other took them somewhere very fancy without consulting them it is understood they are footing the bill.

As things go on? I think in any real relationship the woman who is "rich" would end up paying more or most of the time. Simple reason being that they actually like each other and if she wants a lifestyle he can not afford she will have to enable that. I don't see loving partners being petty about roles or money if there is no strain on them and they do not feel used.

[glennos89]

Obviously it should go both ways. But if the woman is richer and the guy is struggling to pay his bills, then you would be a very selfish individual as being the rich one...
to make his life harder so that you can keep your own money to yourself

Men aren't walking wallets but sometimes I get the idea that some woman do feel like men are.

I myself personally definitely wouldn't date a woman who is selfish enough that she thinks her money is her money and my money is for both of us. That's a absolute turn off for me any day of the week. I want a teamplayer as my wife not a gold digger

[TruthBringer]

Each person paying for their own. And I say this not because of one being rich over the other. It's because we live in a time where feminism has been screaming "equality", and the same women who want "equality" somehow don't want to be treated as an equal when it comes to things like paying the bill.

You can't have your cake and eat it too. Either you're more traditional and are willing to play your part as a traditional woman for me to pay, or you just going to pay for yourself.

But of course, this is going to fall on deaf ears with 99% of the women here.

[HawkPerception]

There is no black and white answer for this. Everyone has their own dynamic for their own scenarios, but I personally believe that going dutch is always the way to go. It shows that no matter how financially successful someone is, you are there for them and not their money. It also shows your time is just as valuable as their time and they are not paying for you to be there. And the best part is, no one expects anything or feels used afterwards if they go their separate ways. Once you're in a relationship, you can figure out your own dynamic after you've established a certain amount of trust with your partner. If the girl has much more money than the guy and she doesn't want to lower her standard of living, then if she's okay dealing with the cost of most things the guy can't afford, then I think that's fine. But the effort to put in your share in the relationship should always be there and you should never be there for a free ride.

[convo_king89]

Traditionally man, but I’ve hated this double standard. It given women the chance to abuse this in other ways.. Because she is “helpless” and can never “pray” on childern, the man is always the suspect.. So if she is rich and clearly not “helpless” I think she should pay. But I honestly would how that would come up before a first date. Like how would the guy knows she’s rich unless she is famous and come up in a Benz. The guy will usually ask the girl on the date and since he invited her technically he should pay but since she is such a generous person she would should pay and not make him feel stupid but paying and say I really enjoy being with you it was fun, let me pay, and you can fuck me later too.

[Asker]

That tradition makes 0 sense if both work.

[richardcory]

I think dates should be inexpensive enough (at least for the wealthier person) that it doesn't matter, but if money is an issue, then splitting is best.

If one person is a lot wealthier, it may be OK for them to pay as long as its done in a way that is showing off.

[AaronKrieger]

It has nothing to do with who's wealthier unless you two went to an expensive restuarant with already having it established the wealthier person would pay for it, but that's if the gap between the two is huge. Outside of that, it's just based on whoever feels like it and is able to do so. Mainly the biggest thing on whatever the two agree upon.

[Anonymous]

Just because a girl has money doesn’t mean I want to take advantage of her. That’s her money so I have to respect that. If I asked for the date, I look at traditional values of being a gentleman and paying for the first date. If she offers the most I can do is split the bill. However, women shouldn’t take advantage of a man or guy who’s rich. This isn’t 1732 anymore, women have good jobs these days. If I am trying to answer this question ethically, women should also view it ethically as well. Problem is, I’ve seen women who want to pull the traditional feminine card when they want. That’s what I can’t stand. This is why it tends to be a headache just to go out with a woman.

[Asker]

That traditional value makes no sense when women work too.

[Wild_princess]

I believe in equal pay... i mean we do live in a world of equality. if i go on a date... i make sure to split up

[Asker]

👏😊

[Sunssong]

You can never go wrong with this mindset. Even if the guy wants to boost his own ego and vanity by paying for it all, I'm sure in the back of his mind he appreciates you wanted and were willing to pay for your meal.

[Wild_princess]

@Sunssong well yes... ofcourse as much as it hurt me spend my money i am sure it hurts him too... dividing hurt and be happy 😂😂

[Nikki1989]

If money is that much of an issue, people shouldn't be dating. It is only money, after all.

[Asker]

But paying is a must. Someone should pay, shouldn't they?

[Unit1]

I concur with Nikki.
And I say this as the "money beast".

[RingOfFire]

I pay for dates. I am not attracted to women who don't expect me to pay for dates.

Does that mean I will NEVER agree to let her pay as a gift for my birthday or something like that if it makes her feel good... no... I am not fanatic about it.

But if we are talking about romantic kind of dates, it is a turnoff to me to have her pay.

[Lionman95]

I´d say the one that iniates the dates should be ready to pay for it. If she´s the rich one she shouldn´t be upset if he doesn´t give her expensive gifts.
So I clicked both because I think it´s good if the guy also takes the iniative since it raises his self confident.

[Unit1]

I prefer to split the bill.

However if she expects me to split the costs for things, that basically sends any lower-middle class person's bank account into depletion if not bankruptcy, then i will not go with it.

Ultimately as someone already mentioned - if money is that big of a deal, then i want no business with that UNLESS of course she can help me getting rich (and not by leeching off from her).

[Asker]

You can't avoid making decisions about paying.
It revolves around money

[Unit1]

We'll see about that.

[XXblack88]

It should be divided equally. one date the woman can pick up the bill the next time the man can. If you're one of those kinds of people who expect the men to pay for everything tell them before the date so they can cancel if they want.

[Asker]

I am one of the women who thinks men and women should

[Asker]

Split the bill

[XXblack88]

that's OK too

[Asker]

Yes. Either split the bill or take turns.
I dislike the male ego of fake "alphas"

[loveslongnails]

If a wealthy woman asked me out on a date, I'd have no problem letting her pay.

[Asker]

But what if you asked her out on a date?

[loveslongnails]

If I asked her out, I'd pay. It's unlikely I'd meet someone I'd consider "rich" who I'd ask out. I don't run with the wealthy.

[Asker]

Why?

[Sunssong]

He doesn't know why. It's because he is blindly accepting cultural norms. That's how the mind works, it will accept anything.

[Anonymous]

If you want a good man who will earn and help you with cooking , chores and other housework then try to take financial responsibilities. After all it's the guy you also like.

If you want a traditional guy who will earn and seldom help you with anything and you are also reluctant to work outside but prefer to work in house only then ask the men to pay for everything.

Different people have different opinions on love , family.

[hbg84]

I chose both equally. Eve though it should depend on where they are at. Seriously if she takes a man to an expensive ass restaurant or bar she should lay. If they go somewhere inexpensive he should pay. Or She pay for whatever is most expensive. The meal or drinks depends on which one cost more

[OfDeath]

Still the man. That is just the rule. It is a date and he is trying to show her that he is eligible. If she is rich and they get married, then she can help with the cost of real estate, cars etc.

[Asker]

So after marriage he is no longer the man? what happens to his eligibility?

[OfDeath]

All assets are shared during marriage. He can physically pay the bill but will be using both of their money. That is the point of marriage. It is a partnership in all respects. Anything less than that is just a joke marriage.

[Asker]

But the woman can use his money both before and after marriage?

[OfDeath]

Not really because he is volunteering. I don't make these rules by the way, it is just what society expects.

[Asker]

But where is the logic?

[OfDeath]

There probably is some if you think about it long enough. Although that would a complicated investigation into evolution, social and behavioral science. I'm not the right person to explain all of that. It's the sort of thing someone like Yuval Noah Harari could probably make sense out of.

Maybe ask him on his twitter or something. He might even answer it.

[Asker]

That tradition makes no sense. Both work. Hence both provide.
I hate fake masculinity

[OfDeath]

I think this is a case of social progress outgrowing what became tradition but probably started out as evolutionary stable strategy (for at least a while). Something which doesn't make sense in a scenario which was previously very uncommon.

[Asker]

Yes. Many women used to stay at home in centuries ago.
If she doesn't work then of course the man should pay

[Sunssong]

@OfDeath @marish01 There is no logic in it because it is based on conditioning/culture. Conditioning accepts anything rather it is logical or illogical. That's why people believe such nonsense. "There probably is some if you think about it long enough" There is no logic in it. The only logic in it is that by not paying as a man you may cause cognitive dissonance in most people. Once upon time there was logic in it because women didn't work as much.

[OfDeath]

@Sunssong I'm referring to the evolutionary chain of events which let to that particular standard.

[Asker]

@Sunssong that is why I said if women work it no longer makes sense. I don't care if society will judge me for wanting to pay for my own meal.
Tradition says women should be virgins till marriage do those foodie call hoes know it? They only support traditional views when it benefits them.

[TheMadLad]

Honestly, I don’t like it when a woman pays for a man.

If she wants to pay for herself thats fine but not for me.

[NathanDavis]

if you can't pay for a date... just don't go around dating

[Asker]

Paying for a date dependson your bank account. Date can cost from several dollars to several hundred thousands dollars.

[NathanDavis]

yes, if you cannot afford things... don't expect them like that

[Sunssong]

Just eat in or dont eat a real meal on the date. Have a fun event and a little snack or something.

[Poliker]

The man should pay always. That is as long as he asks to date her. If she asks, then she is taking the role of the man and she should fulfill her manly role and pay for the first date

[Asker]

If the man I date thinks the man should pay then I will order the most exlensive food so he will have to change his fake alpha attitude.

[Poliker]

That's fair and I agree with this notion

[ohsheeT]

I don't look at it that way none of the above I look at it if I asked her out I'm going to pay I don't care about who makes more money I don't care who has more money I care about that person and I don't want to be fighting over a food receipt

[Haha456]

if you dont want to pay because your partner makes more money, you are not in love. A man truly in love would die for his woman. Love is when their happiness matters more than your own

[Asker]

If a woman doesn't want to pay because her partner makes more money, she is not in love. A woman truly in love would die for her man.
I role reversed

[Haha456]

@marish01

evolutionarily, a woman's life is more valuable than a man's life. Without a woman, her children will not survive. Without females, the human population will cease to exist.

This is why men have a biological instinct to protect women. While women have a biological instinct to protect children.

[Asker]

Wow. It is so much protection to pay for her stomach
That woman is saved. Glory to her hero!

[Haha456]

@marish01

men like to provide. why do you think so many men want housewives on GAG?

because men like to pay...

a man who will not pay for your dinner, will not take good care of you after marriage...

[Haha456]

@marish01

you don't see women wanting husbands to stay at home and take care of the babies while she goes to pay the bills...

[Asker]

If he pays then she does the housework otherwise it's not fair.

[Haha456]

@marish01

Love is never about fairness. If you truly loved someone, you wouldn't care if they repaid you back

Feminine energy is to receive. Masculine energy is to provide.

Dont like it? Deal with it

[Asker]

Feminine energy is submissive. Feminine women are selfless, nurturing and caring.
When submissiveness is about being dead fish or acting like audience who waots to get entertained then this is where she becomes boring. When a woman has nothing to offer other than her used up vagina then she believes she is the one who should recieve everything.
And I don't have to accept your rules of how a man and a woman should be. So your advice "deal with it" makes no sense.

[Asker]

"Love is never about fairness. If you truly loved someone, you wouldn't care if they repaid you back"
Then
A woman should never worry if her man loves her less than she loves him. If she truly loves her man, she won't care if he repays her back

[Haha456]

Feminine energy embraces receiving. Surrender to receiving by asking for support and help or accepting a compliment. Perhaps head into nature and receive the beauty of the world around you: the trees, the grass, the sky and the clouds. Take in the calm beauty all around you

amyyipcoaching.com/.../

[Asker]

What does feminine emergy give men in return other than sucking money and support?

[Haha456]

@marish01

feminine energy is NOT designed to give... feminine energy is designed to receive.

men and women are not made to be the same.

if you don't like it, tell all men to date other men.

[Asker]

Females are designed to be selfless not selfish.
Only dormats would be attracted to the submissive type of women you described.
Think about it. A woman who only gets and doesn't give is useless grass.

[Asker]

When a woman has nothing to offer but her vagina she tends to think she should be the only one to get benefits.
Such thinking made many women underdeveloped, helpless and useless.

[Haha456]

@marish01

women are definitely selfless. women have to give up their careers , money, promotions so they can give men children. men get children for free. women actually have to sacrifice themselves for it. In fact, women have DIED FOR MILLIONS of years during childbirth. Its not only up until the last few decades where dying from childbirth is less common.

[Haha456]

@marish01

men are designed to provide. women are not designed to provide. its not something you can argue against. its nature.

[Asker]

So women shouldn't work?

[Haha456]

@marish01

even if women work, they are not psychologically designed to be the "provider" in the romantic relationship.

there's a reason why women marry men who make more money while men prefer to marry women who make less money. Argue with it all you want, you can't change it.

[Asker]

Who should she work for?

[Asker]

Wanting to marry a woman who earns less doesn't mean expecting her to not support the family.

[Haha456]

men want housewives. women do not. Today women work because they HAVE TO work becasue most families cannot survive on one income

[Asker]

So whether she is designed to work or not doesn't matter. She like men should provide for the family.

[Haha456]

@marish01

it doesn't change the fact that women don't like to pay for dates. because she is not designed to be a provider. men like to be providers.

[Asker]

Whether she likes or not is irrevalent.
It is irrational and immature to expect others to pay for your own shit. You work. You are not a housewife.

[Asker]

Do women like to pay taxes? It is not about liking. You must pay whether you like it or not

[Haha456]

@marish01

Yes it is about like. We are free to date who date richer men. Just like men have the option to date younger women. We are ALLOWED to have our preferences.

Women look for financially stable man. While men look for the most fertile women.

Why are you arguing against this?

[Haha456]

[Whether she likes or not is irrevalent.
It is irrational and immature to expect others to pay for your own shit. You work. You are not a housewife.]

Nothing irrational about nature...

[Asker]

Richer men date younger women for sure.

A woman who is able to work is able to pay for her own shit

[Haha456]

@marish01

men don't want women to work. why do you think so many men on here insist on how women should be stay home wives?

men don't want women to work. they want nurturing women who can be great mothers.

[Asker]

Are they able to provide for the family?
This is toxic masculinity

What does a man get from his woman? What is she able to give to him?

[Haha456]

@marish01

a woman is supposed to produce children and raise the kids well. women are supposed to provide sex for men and give him comfort.

[sheenagwapa]

the man... but they can also agree who invited who pay for the date but if it's a long term relationship usually such issue don't exist that much anymore because you guys are more relaxed you see your SO as your bestfriend.

[cth96190]

Such a relationship would not happen, because women are attracted to men who have more resources and higher status than the women do.

Women are repulsed by poor men.

[Asker]

If he is not rich then he's poor?

[Anonymous]

It's truly insane that this is still a question in 2023. The bill should be split, period.

[Asker]

100%
Whoever shames men for wanting to split is a little boy with huge ego who wants to appear masculine.
Cringy.
If I dated such a man I'd give him a lesson that would make him mature faster.

[Opinion Owner]

This is more a problem with women than men though.

[Juxtapose]

If she's going to a regular poor person restaurant? Then we can split the bill. If she wants to go to some sort of rich place? I'm going to need *A LOT* of help.

[Sunssong]

You see that is actually a sound comment. I respect that comment.

[Juxtapose]

Thanks, just being realistic.

[Tomisworthless]

Even if a women makes more she expects the man to pay. Her wealth is for her only, his wealth is our wealth naturally

[Asker]

A rich woman needs his cents?

[Tomisworthless]

A rich women doesn’t care she won’t pay she still wants to be treated

[Asker]

Depends on the woman.
Would she order a cheap thing he can afford or an expensive thing she can afford?
Why to deprive herself just for getting him to spend his little money?

[Tomisworthless]

Regardless of the price. Women don’t like splitting the bill on the first date regardless. They will ask if you want to split to sound nice but if you agree there won’t be a second date due to her view of you being diminished or if there is a second date then we’ll she sees something worth pursuing in him

[Asker]

Then you will see who TRULY wants YOU.

[Tomisworthless]

This isn’t up for debate.

[Jamie05rhs]

I agree with Marish.

Tom, yes, you are right in regards to traditional people. But I view them as small-minded and stuck in an outdated era. I have zero interest in mating with someone of that type.

[Tomisworthless]

@Jamie05rhs dude thing is woman pick and choice when equality works. They want a man to be a provider and adhere to their traditional role yet they themselves don’t want to adhere to theirs

[Jamie05rhs]

@Tomisworthless I know. Lol. That's why I don't f with women like that. They can live their own lives but they're not dragging me into it.

[Billlewis]

Exactly! Here's a guy who gets it.

[Fireguy17]

If the guy doen't have a lot of money he would not be able to spend as much per date as she could.

[Jamie05rhs]

It doesn't matter how much money she has. I still pay for myself, and she pays for herself.

[motownplayer2000]

Easy I always say whoever ask who out. But since there aren’t many which women out here. And most rich women do onlyfans or whatever and I wouldn’t date one of those girls to save my life. I will never run into that problem.

[serious_miss419]

Who said dates have to cost money? The cost of a date is determined on your idea of a date. A stroll through a nice walk way with genuine talking and holding hands is great. Relaxing watching a funny movie at home is always great!
Keep it light

[HighValue]

When a relationship is new, each person should pay their own way at first. No obligations and nobody feels used.

[LiamJHayden]

If people are arguing over who pays for the dates, my suspicion is that the relationship is unlikely to last long.

[Asker]

So the man should always pay?

[LiamJHayden]

Never said that

[Asker]

But someone must pay for dates

[Arik_jade]

Well it depends... who initiated the date proposal that person should pay... irrespective of that she is reacher or not..

[Asker]

What if she orders expensive drink and food that he is unable to pay for?

[Arik_jade]

Then he should be honest with her and ask her that "I really want to pay for this drink but currently he could not afford it. So could you please pay out".. Relationships should start with honesty and transparency. Do not show up that you are also a rich guy if she is rich. Instead try to win her through ur love and affection.

[Sunssong]

You see the problem with your comment is men are usually aspected to ask for the date... Which means, according to you, they are responsible for paying for the date due to that. IF you agree to the date you should have to pay your half. Nobody is forcing you to come.

[Arik_jade]

@Sunssong First of all, based on the budget, a person should select the place. Secondly, I think u didn't seen my previous comment:
Then he should be honest with her and ask her that "I really want to pay for this drink but currently he could not afford it. So could you please pay out".. Relationships should start with honesty and transparency. Do not show up that you are also a rich guy if she is rich. Instead try to win her through ur love and affection.

[Guanfei]

Both equally. The amount of money isn't relevant, the idea is to have both participate.

[crossdressingrihno]

Whoever set up the date pays for the date unless a previous agreement was made.

[misogynistic_pig]

I will never pay for a date, I don't care if the woman is poor or rich.

[Sparkie460]

The guy always pays when he takes a woman out on a date.

[Asker]

Why? Makes no sense

[Sparkie460]

That is how I was brought up. If a guy takes a girl out on a date he pays for everything. He should also open doors for her, help her with her seat.
It's the respectful way to treat a woman.

[Asker]

Then the woman should cook and clean his house. It's the respectful way to treat a man.

[Sparkie460]

If they are living together yes.

[Asker]

A man should pay for her always but she should clean his house only after marriage?

[Sparkie460]

Even If they live together before marriage.

[Sunssong]

Once again, proving the point, that it is all conditioning for them and not based on logical.

[Danny_dan92]

Bread winner.




It’s the courteous thing to do

[Asker]

That applies to women too

[Danny_dan92]

Correct

[EaterPeter]

Man should pay. I have came to the point where I can allow her pay 1/3rd max, ofcourse she has to allow me too

[Asker]

What if she orders expensive drink and food that he is unable to pay for?

[EaterPeter]

Well then he have choice if he can't pay someone will have to pay

[james_d0007]

sometimes men sometimes women you cannot expect 1 person only to pay

[Anpu23]

Whoever asks the other out is the one who should cover the meal.

[imawfulatusernames]

I genuinely don’t believe anyone arguing about this is in nor will be in a healthy relationship

[Asker]

Then what people should do?
Not pay for dates?

[imawfulatusernames]

I’ve never had this be an issue. Like literally ever, nor has anyone I’ve ever known.

[Asker]

Who PAID for your dates?

[imawfulatusernames]

Which dates?

[imawfulatusernames]

Also why did you put paid in caps girl calm down lol

[Asker]

If you are offended by the fact I used capitalized letters to draw your attention then you're the one who needs to calm down.
Someone must pay for dates. Therefore this is a question that should be discussed. It is not necessarily an issue but something to discuss. If you go on a date to café or somewhere else to have something to eat in the end the bill must be paid. You can't avoid. Therefore someone pays.

[imawfulatusernames]

I’m not offended I’m pointing out how stupid it was when I’m not 4 and yknow can read. Again this has never been an issue or me or anyone I know, it doesn’t need discussion

[Asker]

Who should pay for the date?

[Asker]

Do you even have a stance on it?

[imawfulatusernames]

No I don’t because it’s a pointless topic 😅It’s not even an issue outside of the internet babes I beg you go outside, touch the grass, talk to real people

[Asker]

So when you go on a date and ask tge check who gets the card to pay it? Who makes that decision?

[Asker]

You have no stance on who should pay? So you sit there and do nothing or run away when the check comes?

[imawfulatusernames]

I literally have no stance I’ve already told you this😅It also isn’t a real world issue babe touch the grass maybe actually go on a date

[Asker]

You think no one should pay?

[imawfulatusernames]

Are you illiterate? I. Telling you it isn’t a real world problem. Please for the love of whatever you believe in just go on a fucking date

[Asker]

I didn't ask if you think it is a problem. I asked who pays for your dates. Stop pretending as if paying the bill never happens. Someone PAYS.

[imawfulatusernames]

Yes someone pays and the argument about who should is an internet thing I’m begging you to leave the internet and go outside😅

[Asker]

You wait them to pay or you pay?

[imawfulatusernames]

Girly pop I’m begging you to go outside and realise that this isn’t a real thing, like genuinely it’s not

[Asker]

Do you wait them to pay or you pay?

[Anonymous]

Money shouldn’t matter dates should always be split.

[CuriousMufuxka]

The man! I mean the government.. Nah kidding, I believe it should be mutual no matter any monetary status. Go Dutch!

[KrakenAttackin]

If she is rich she won't be dating a broke man.

[najekim]

Paid for by whomever arranged the date in the first place.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

If the woman is rich then why not her? She's got money to burn.

[msc545]

The man, if he wants to have any chance at anything.

[Anonymous]

I don't mind paying on date...
Even if she is rich...
If she giving me her hole then I should at least buy a lunch for her. 😊

[Kabluie]

Equal is good, performing as unit.

[MementoMori777]

Depends who asked who is what I thought

[Asker]

The man asked

[MementoMori777]

Then it's only right for him to pay because he's inviting the woman somewhere, imagine someone invites you somewhere and then they expect you to pay, it's why I think it depends on who asks who

[Asker]

Then I would order lots of expensive food making sure he is not able to pay

[MementoMori777]

Why 🥺😂

[Asker]

To break his toxic fake masculinity.
He thinks the man should pay even if she's rich then he should provide the expensive pleasures the woman wants.

[MementoMori777]

Damn, rip to that dudes bank account then lol

[Asker]

I don't need his money. I want his love.

[MementoMori777]

Then why would you destroy his masculinity tho, at that point you are breaking the man ha

[Asker]

By paying for us? Is it really destroying him? If yes then he is a little boy

[MementoMori777]

I mean what if he wants to pay for you cause it's coming from his heart and he wants to make you feel special? To then for you to order the most expensive things on the menu so he purposely can't pay it, that's somewhat toxic as well if you think of it, it's like an ego game lol

[Asker]

I won't feel special because he's willing to sacrifice some dollars. Loving and respecting me would make me special which are free.

[MementoMori777]

Well yea but because he wants to pay for you he doesn't love you or respect you?

[Asker]

Why would he want to pay for me if I were rich?

[MementoMori777]

Cause it's not about the money, it's for the reason you just mentioned, even tho he knows you have a lot of money, he's willing to sacrifice his chump change for you and willing to spent his last dollar on you, he might not have a lot of money but if he's willing to spend on you even if you have more money and he knows it but still wants too, then doesn't that normally mean his heart is made of gold?

[Asker]

How could I take his money when he needs it and I absolutely don't.
It's like saying the poor person should give their last cent to a millionaire because it shows love

[MementoMori777]

Thing is you are still thinking of the money, I see where you are coming from but it's not about the money, if he wants to spend his money on his girl, why would you stop him? One thing that can make a man feel bad is feeling like he can't support his girl in any way, men love taking care of their woman, it can be devastating feeling like you can't so I'd say just give the man the happiness of it, they aren't thinking of the money and neither should you 😆

[MementoMori777]

A guy that's in love would worsen his life just to bring a smile on their partners face, guys see it as a well worth sacrifice.

[Asker]

A girl who loves her man wohldn't smile because his life got worse because of her

[MementoMori777]

I see where you are coming from but if you believe in blessings then this is seen differently

[Asker]

It is a blessing if he worsened his life for me?
He must be stupid for expecting the girl who truly loves him be happy she ruined his life

[MementoMori777]

No no, blessings will come his way by taking leaps of faith with love, after all its not about the money, you are only thinking of that, consider it an investment in love lol

[Asker]

It's not about money. That is why I don't need his money.

[MementoMori777]

Alright marish, I mean if you want to pay for everything make sure to let him know lol

[Asker]

So he makes sure not to take his money? Lol

[MementoMori777]

Well yea since you are so against him paying with his chump change, you don't want him ruining his life or whatever 😂

You like to complicate yourself don't you marish? 🤣

[Asker]

You said about his will of worsening his life just to make her smile.
It is ruining his life

[MementoMori777]

I'm saying a man would but it doesn't necessarily mean every expense he does ruins his life lol

[Asker]

And I don't want that him

[MementoMori777]

Okay marish, you got a wonderful soul but I feel like not letting the dude pay for dates even if you are rich is somewhat unnecessary, mostly if he wants to pay

[Asker]

If he wants to spend his money on me then an engagement ring is that very excuse. Lol

[MementoMori777]

I guess but let's be foreal, what's gonna make him broker, an engagement ring or paying for date 😂

At that point you might as well let him pay for dates too lol

[Asker]

I mean if he wants to show off his generosity that much engagement ring gives him that chance lol

[MementoMori777]

I completely agree marish but lol

What if he wants to also show generosity by taking you on dates and paying for them 😂

[Asker]

He could but what if I don't feel touched by his stubbornness of paying for everything? If he's doing it only for me and that is NOT what I want, what is the meaning of still wanting to try to "please" me in that ineffective way.
I enjoy his presence. That's it.

[MementoMori777]

Well it doesn't have to be everything, sometime you and sometimes him and sometimes y'all can come with a truce and both put in lol

[kevypatyy7]

Yeah the one sets the date, pays for it.

[Asker]

Sounds like ultimatum.
You invited then pay for my stomach

[kevypatyy7]

𝚈𝚎𝚊𝚑... 𝚋𝚎𝚌𝚊𝚞𝚜𝚎 𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚐𝚘𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚘 𝚏𝚎𝚎𝚍 𝚒𝚗 𝚖𝚢 𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚜𝚎 𝚊𝚗𝚢𝚠𝚊𝚢𝚜

[Asker]

You could then meet him

[kevypatyy7]

𝚈𝚎𝚊𝚑

[Sunssong]

@kevypatyy7 I use to think that way because I was TOLD that. But then I realize MEN are aspected to do the inviting which means men are basically always aspected to pay. That is bs. Now do I care if I pay all of it? No I dont care one bit. I just dislike dumb culture rules that everyone blindly accepts. I'd like it if my date thought for herself and didn't buy into culture for no reason.

[kevypatyy7]

@sunssong that's true, even I didn't want to believe in the traditional and cultural stuff but am a girl, I don't expect my date to make me pay the food. I don't mind contributing but fully paying, isn't in deal

[strateguy632]

i still should offer in case she wants me to pay.

[shades777]

you know if the shoe was on the other foot she's not going to pay even if she's the one would set up the date

[Andres77]

Whoever invited the other

[Asker]

The man.

[Andres77]

I'm saying that whoever invites should be the one to pay

[Asker]

what if she orders very expensive drinks and food?

[Andres77]

Then there won't be a second date if she's selfish and inconsiderate

[Andres77]

If it's obvious that he's only looking for one thing and she recognizes it then he deserves it.

[Asker]

What if they are dating?
Plus tge question refers to a rich woman not a gold digger

[Andres77]

Then I'd say that she should be aware of his financial status and order accordingly

[Asker]

What if she is rich and wants to have expensive drinks and food? She is willing to pay.

[Andres77]

That's fine. A relationship should be cooperative. She should be able to have what she wants.

[Asker]

So she should pay?

[Andres77]

If she wants extra expensive stuff and she can afford it, and it's out of his budget then yes, she should pay. At least for all the really expensive stuff she wants.

[Asker]

Then where is the rule that the man should pay? See how fake this tradition is?

[Andres77]

It's a tradition. Now women have better jobs and they want "equality in everything". So, fine, pay for your own stuff.
As you can see in other's posts they think the guy should pay for everything.
For me, since women want equality then I'll support that.
I'm courteous to everyone, so I'll hold open a door for anyone and help anyone with a heavy item. I've always done that.
Plus, the scenario wasn't clear at first
Date, friends, spouses. It's all different.

[Asker]

So what it's a tradition?
Is that a reason to follow it?

[Andres77]

Some do, some don't. Depends on the guy.

[roy_ricky09]

Whoevers idea was it to go on a date

[Asker]

The man's. But what if she orders very expensive drinks and food?

[roy_ricky09]

So what

[Asker]

He can't pay

[roy_ricky09]

Then she can pay... Simple... Unless she has plans to embarrass the guy intentionally

[Asker]

So the rich woman should pay eventually.

[roy_ricky09]

That's not what I said... Read carefully.
Guys must come prepared. Secondly what in the world would happen if the girl pays?
3rd... if the girl already knows the guys isn't as rich, then she wouldn't order something that he can't afford... In my opinion this isn't a date at all...

[Asker]

1) how prepared if she can order things that will be too much for him?
How prepared? Having all his money he saved with him?
2) nothing. She has money. She provides. She can pay too
3) why should the rich girl deprives of her favorite expensive things just because it would hurt the man's ego if she paid?

[roy_ricky09]

She earned that money or inherited?

[Asker]

Discuss both cases.
In both cases she has experienced expensive pleasures.

[roy_ricky09]

Answer the question

[Manuel2]

When money gets involved the relatinship is over

[Asker]

You can't avoid money

[Manuel2]

Yes you can.
When you are having sex. Are you charging by the thrust or how many time they cum

[Asker]

I don't have sex.

How can you avoid money? Do you not buy gifgts, pay for dates, etc.

[Anonymous]

Both

[Asker]

If the roles were reversed and he was the rich one then who should pay? Still both?

[Opinion Owner]

I think the man should pay the bill and the woman should leave a tip. this is the best way.

[Asker]

So the rich one pays the bill and the non rich one pays the tip regardless of gender?