If you are kind and a giver , should you want or expect something in return?

[Anonymous]

If I'm kind to someone i never want or expect anything in return. I am kind because i enjoy giving or helping people. I don't mean in the sense of lavish gifts though. Even if it's just taking someone for a coffee to cheer them up or giving them a lift somewhere in my car. Or buying them a token gift or card, like a get well card or thinking of you card when they're going through a hard time. That sort of thing.

My guy friend said i should stop being kind, because it means I'm being used and just a doormat. He said if people don't retun the kindess i should stop giving. That i should only be kind to people who give back. What's your thoughts?

Updates

+1 y

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[sawno]

Being a giver has risks, you can easily get taken advantage off.
So my biggest advice is only give what you truly enjoy giving, don't let others persuade you into giving something more than that without something reasonable in return.

Otherwise you get into situations where you for example work incredibly hard to keep a company afloat and then when you burn out doing it instead of helping you they just ditch you and play the same cold corporate game of not caring.

So definitely give, but give to people who actually care about you, give what you don't mind giving or set terms of what you receive back.

[Asker]

Thank you. That makes sense.

[strateguy632]

important not to expect and real giving is free without expecting give back.

[Paris13]

It's Always Better to Give Than To Receive. I Am A lot Like You. However, If You ever Give in a Direction where You See You are being Used for just That----SCAT. xxoo

[Paris13]

Thanks to God and Gag. xxoo

[TacosRAwesome]

Technically you shouldn't but would it cost them to not be entitled.

[Anarcamus]

This is very true. The catch is give without expectation