What are the difficulties both genders face today when dating?

Question

Why is it hard for men and women to connect and long term date or date to marry in this day and age?

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

When it comes to dating, both genders can face a range of difficulties in today's society. It's important to note that experiences can vary greatly for individuals, and not all people may encounter the same challenges. However, here are some common difficulties both genders may face when it comes to dating:

Difficulties faced by both genders:

1. Communication: Effective communication is crucial in any relationship, but it can be challenging for both genders. Misinterpretation of messages, fear of expressing one's feelings, or difficulty in conveying emotions can hinder the development of a healthy connection.

2. Trust: Building trust takes time and effort, and it can be difficult for both genders. Past experiences, insecurities, and fear of vulnerability can make it challenging to establish a strong foundation of trust with a potential partner.

3. Compatibility: Finding someone who shares similar interests, values, and life goals can be a struggle for both genders. It may take time and multiple dating experiences to discover compatibility with another person.

4. Rejection: Facing rejection is a common part of dating for both genders. It can be disheartening and impact one's self-esteem. Fear of rejection may also prevent individuals from approaching someone they are interested in.

5. Online dating challenges: With the prevalence of online dating apps and platforms, both genders face unique challenges. These include dealing with ghosting (when someone suddenly stops communicating), catfishing (creating a false identity online), and the overwhelming number of options available, which can make it difficult to form meaningful connections.

6. Unrealistic expectations: Society often perpetuates unrealistic expectations about relationships and dating, which can affect both genders. These expectations can create pressure to conform to certain standards or lead to disappointment when reality doesn't align with the idealized portrayal of dating.

Specific difficulties faced by men:

1. Traditional gender roles: Men may face pressure to conform to traditional gender roles, such as being the initiator or provider in a relationship. This can create expectations or restrictions that may not align with an individual's desires or personality.

2. Stereotypes: Men may face stereotypes related to masculinity, such as the need to be emotionally strong or suppress vulnerability. These stereotypes can hinder open communication and emotional expression, making it difficult to form deep connections.

Specific difficulties faced by women:

1. Gender-based stereotypes: Women may face stereotypes related to femininity, such as being overly emotional or passive. These stereotypes can influence how their actions and choices are perceived in the dating realm, and they may face challenges in being heard and taken seriously.

2. Safety concerns: Women often have to be cautious about their personal safety when dating. Concerns about physical safety, harassment, and assault can be more prominent for women, leading to a need for extra vigilance and precautions.

It's important to remember that these difficulties are not exclusive to one gender and can overlap or manifest differently for different individuals. Building healthy relationships requires empathy, understanding, and open communication to navigate these challenges effectively.

nitsuj86 · Accepted Answer

From a male perspective, I often felt like I was putting in all the work for the bare minimum effort from a lot of women.

If she is even remotely attractive, she usually expects me to do a bunch of extra shit, just for the chance to get some sex. Which is for both of us. And even then, in my experience, I also have to do all the work in the bedroom as well, most women are terrible in bed, they just think they are great because men are easy to please.

Once you are in a relationship, now there is a whole new list of things that I have to do and an ever-dwindling list of things that are expected of her.

If I criticize a woman at all they won't listen unless I tell them all the shit they are good at first, I have to walk on eggshells.

A lot of women, if they were men, would never get any pussy. lol. 70% have inflated egos, and I am just not the type of guy that is able to deal with that shit.

Overall, women expect a lot and provide very little in return.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Mariage is less important than before. Because a woman can do her life alone, and its the same for the man.
In old days women had to marry at early ages because they couldnt work. Now its different.
Plus, the mariage perspective changed very much with nowadays. You dont feel the need to do it because you can have a relationship without it.
The only interesting thing are the rights that it gives you.
Or you want to be married just to be married and thats it. Mariage can be very disapointed too and maybe now that the obligations is off, people dont want to commit themself to something like that.
Without mariage, you can leave whenever you want...

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

This is a really good question. Many factors can have an impact on it. Communication issues, commitment, not trusting on another, etc. it’s weird and it’s really hard. Shit I have a major crush on this guy and I believe he likes me back. Terrible texter, fine in person. Willing to help me and wanting me to do my best. But I don't know if he has a girlfriend. I don’t think he does as I don’t see one on any of his social media accounts, but you never know, but I don’t think so. At least I don’t think he does. Lol 😂 I’m staying hopeful!

Avicenna · Answer

Finding suitable and stable people to date has got to be the main challenge

Anonymous · Answer

In the past dating was a means to an end. People dated to find a life partner and get married. Marriage was the end game and dating was a critical step toward that goal. But marriage is no longer the prize it used to be. Many people think marriage is unnecessary. And for men in particular marriage is no longer worthwhile. Half of marriages end in divorce, women file 80% of divorces and men get screwed in divorce court and child custody, so it's a huge risk for men. Add to that the fact that there are fewer benefits for men in marriage now, and because casual sex is now the norm, the "carrot" looks more like a twig to men.

All of this affects dating in a big way. It's not taken as seriously as it used to be. People date people they wouldn't want to marry just for fun or sex. And a lot pf people don't date at all for one reason or another. Many women choose to focus on their careers during their 20s and don't take dating seriously until they reach an age where dating becomes a lot more difficult because they squandered their prime years during which they were most desirable to men.

Online dating is a big problem too. It commoditizes dating and cheapens it. Dating apps have largely become hookup apps.

It's all just a mess.

dragoblack · Answer

Ghosting goes for both. Men have to deal with algorithms of date apps screwing them over if they dislike, where women get to freely choose. Men get bombarded with scammers, solicitors, and fake profiles on date sites & apps, where women get bombarded with dick pics, insecure dudes who can't accept rejection, and dudes who just want a quick lay.
Both can't be honest with each other and would like to play mind games. Both can't just get to know each other instead of jumping into relationships after hooking up.
Women tend to have unrealistic expectations of men and stuck on wanting to be pampered instead of facing reality that old standards are outdated and society has made it to where most men can barely afford to date, much less financially support another person.
Both can't handle relationships like a mature adult and would rather make all of their drama public or turn their drama abusive.
(NOTE: not saying this applies to all, just most)

Ihatethewill · Answer

Lack of respect and sexual discipline. Girls and guys want as many options as possible to avoid feeling lonely, casual sex happens before you even establish a relationship with your partner, everyone wants clout, mass use of porn.
Most men, don't have the discipline to hold in their seed, if he's not getting any play then he's wacking it.
Some women choose to delude themselves into thinking mister. top 2% man will settle for them.
Then there's social media turning dating into a competiton.

Anemone978 · Answer

Social media ruined the world and people following stupid dating things like "Having a talking stage" but instead of liking one person they are talking to 7... like what happened to "I like you, you wanna be my girlfriend?" after being friends for a week and if it doesn't work out you break up.. Why is it now like a marriage proposal to ask someone to be your boyfriend/girlfriend.. What happened to the world?

Singing_Hollow · Answer

The biggest issues in todays dating world is the lack of respect for each other. If you have respect then there would be no cheating, a mutual understanding, communication, love, emotional balance etc... it all comes down to respect

Quigly · Answer

A relationship is an investment that has a very poor track record of being a good one. If it was stock on the stock market, You wouldn't want it. Many do not take a relationship very seriously with anyone. Virtually none of the woman that I have dated are married or even in another relationship to this very day. .

Spade_01 · Answer

Cheating (a big one), Lying and hiding in things, Opposite gender 'friends' and complications involved with them, Lack of mutual understanding, Feminism, Normalising casual sexual intercourse, Defying every single bit of gender roles etc.

BoopBoopBeep · Answer

Having enough free time really. I have a busy schedule and it's hard to work in everyone possible when you're trying to find out who is more likely to be "the one."

Nikki1989 · Answer

Meeting people is so easy.  Meeting people you have things in common with is the difficult part.

Anonymous · Answer

The delusional over-correction against misogyny, which pretends that the differences between the sexes are illusory, trivial and man-made, give each gender a false (sometimes damaging) set of beliefs and expectations about the other.

Melody7685 · Answer

For me the lack of communication really does a number. No one seems to know how to communicate their feelings especially when things are going wrong. So many people don’t even want to put the energy in. People seem to fail to grasp that a relationship takes work and you get what you put in, but there has to be a balance

Adam1978 · Answer

Entitlement, instant expectations, bad communications and no effort.

LiamJHayden · Answer

1. Too many options. 2. Witnessing too many failed marriages. 3. Unrealistic expectations, often fueled by social media 4. Little societal pressure to marry.

Chthou95 · Answer

Men not having any opportunities to date or any options. Women having a lot of options but looking for mr perfect and never feeling satisfied

Juxtapose · Answer

Simps oversaturate women with attention while the average guy starves for attention so on that point right there the two sides are going to have trouble seeing eye to eye and are going to have different priorities.

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

It would depend on the person. In my case, most women are boring to me, so its a rareness issue.

Jamie05rhs · Answer

The main problem is not everyone wants the same thing.

Sasha0426 · Answer

Men believe all women are gold diggers and women believe all men are rapists they rather date other women.

BLP11520 · Answer

I think the fast pace of today makes it hard for all people period.

Jmmmfi4 · Answer

I wouldn't even know I quit trying long ago

Anonymous · Answer

Our mutual purpose is to reproduce. Otherwise we have no purpose to live or love one another. The purpose is only because of society which was created, society is not natural or organic. No other species has a society.

gothbxtch · Answer

i feel like dating has probably always been hard.

Likes2drive · Answer

Seems like trust is a big part of it and unrealistic standards

CuriousMufuxka · Answer

Actually nothing if they don't bring their past into something new.

imfreeze95 · Answer

Men can’t find women who act like women and vice versa

WalnutButter · Answer

I think the Internet screwed that up.

fonduegirl · Answer

Why are long term bonds defined by marriage

SigmaNiggeh · Answer

Lack of meaningful connection.

DiegoO · Answer

I still don't know what that means

BarryLiverstone · Answer

As many as there used to be.

Anonymous · Answer

You don't want to hear it.

What are the difficulties both genders face today when dating?

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