Girls, what do you think about a girls dad and brother being overprotective?

[Anonymous]

intimidate, threaten or scare there daughter or sister boyfriend once or repeatedly

[jennifer_bloom]

Some parents are like that when the kid first starts dating but soften up after a few relationships or dates. It happened to my cousin when she first started going on dates with guys and her first boyfriend dumped her over guilt at making her parents angry. Now she is married.

[Rei13]

I never had to deal with an overprotective father or brother. My dad definitely does not want me with someone who wouldn’t care for me or was ‘bad’, and I would like to think the same for my brother but my brother is indifferent/probably wouldn’t care as it didn’t effect him. I don’t know how I would deal with that personally because it isn’t a thing for me, but I don’t think it is bad on the mild side. If it is extreme that just sounds unhealthy tbh

[Adaeva]

A girl is going to date who they want regardless. If the father or brother is a problem she will meet the guy elsewhere and the father and brother will never see him until she accepts an engagement ring. If they are still a problem she will get married without their approval and they lose a sister or daughter until the come around.

[Kori1236]

I mean my brothers are over protective but if I tell them to leave it alone they’ll leave it alone. The only time a sibling intimidated a partner of mine is when my ex was harassing me, and while I didn’t want them to get involved it was a lot easier than getting a restraining order and involving the police

[whoknowsb]

It is not cool. Also because even if we can like being protected we also know we are able to protect ourselves. I guess i can understand why they would try to protect, but both sides must be viewed in order to have some balance between protection/affection and freedom. Both in platonic and romantic relationships.

[Anonymous]

truthfully the first word that came to my mine was pathetic also. it's not like women are completely helpless. we will be okay without being sheltered and overprotected. for what reason? it makes us feel like we can't do anything and are dependent, which is far from the truth.

[sheikalana]

Sounds intimidating and annoying at the same time but makes me realize she's love and probably has two men in her life who are willing to protect her and only want the best for her.

[A_Bell]

I only had older sisters and they broke my dad before I dated, so I got to do what I wanted.

[Anonymous]

don't tell them to much because if you get mad at a guy and get over it they will still be mad at him and hassle him

[WhitneySnow]

Did he do anything to hurt her?

[Asker]

no he didn't he is just being over protective and threate or intimidating or scaring

[WhitneySnow]

I don’t like it but I guess they don’t want her to get hurt by guys who will just use her

[Asker]

so do you think its normal or natural and would you be mad or annoyed or upset if it happened to you

[WhitneySnow]

I don’t know. I’d be a little annoyed if my dad was that overprotective of me and I’d probably try to sneak around but at the same time I’d understand it was because he loves me.

[Asker]

is this overwhelming for you to talk about or think about

[WhitneySnow]

No..

[Asker]

wym by sneak around and do u think its wrong and mean to the guy and invasive to the girl

[Asker]

you dont have to answer the sneak around question if you dont want to buddy and i dont wanna get in trouble i am a little above 18 and your 17 i can see

[WhitneySnow]

I think it’s invasive to the girl but I get why her dad would do that.

[Asker]

so its wrong

[WhitneySnow]

I guess. Like I don’t want my parents doing that to me, but I also understand why they’re doing it, if that makes any sense.

[Asker]

lets divide this into levels
level 1 overprotection
intimidates boyfriend once, looks out for daughter and sister,

level 2 overprotection
doesn't allow them to have a boyfriend until age 16, scares daughter or sisters boyfriend,

level 3 overprotection threatens daughter or sisters boyfriend, doesn't want her talkign to guys or having guy friends or feels uncomfortable about it but tolerates it ish

level 4 overprotection intimidates or threatens daughter or sist boyfriend repeatedly for 2 or mor weeks, stalks sister or daughter, hacks her fb or facebook,

[Asker]

i have autism & adhd and i like to understand the nuances and girls perspesctive and this is the best way i can explan my nuanced understanding from my guy perspective

[WhitneySnow]

That sounds nuts the way you put it. Not to mention patriarchal. This happened to you?

[Asker]

no and we could edit and modify this to 5 and add an extra one to over protective level 1 below all the others and the others are 2 to 5 were its they look out for her a lot but i think 3 and 4 are objectification and toxic

[petitedollbabee]

It’s pathetic.

[Asker]

explain

wht would you do if your dad or bro was doing that

[petitedollbabee]

Tell them to grow up and respect my relationship or go away.