Is it ok to go clubs alone while in a relationship?

Question

I went for 3 weeks to visit my family back home while my boyfriend enjoys his life when I’m not there. Go clubs, seeing his friends etc. Is this ok that he’s acting this way? I’m actually thinking his more happy on his own than when I’m there and I told him that, but we barely have time to talk when I’m away. Do I have right to be jealous that he’s clubbing, go for parties etc, or I’m overthinking and overreacting. Tbh I don’t even know if I trust him cuz we are at the beginning of our relationship and I just feel like when he’s gonna go clubs he’s gonna meet someone else

Finchie40 · Accepted Answer

No it’s not , that’s a huge red flag and something I won’t tolerate in a relationship anymore. , So if he is consistently going to the club with his friends without you, I am sorry to say , but he is more
Than likely being up to no good , he is probably flirting or hitting on other girls behind your back or even hooking up with other girls’ behind your back So yes You have every right to feel the way that you do , it’s pure disrespectful behavior and it shows your boyfriend only really cares about himself, if he actually cared about you and loved you , he wouldn’t be putting himself in those environments without you what so ever , especially, if you don’t go to those places without him. I don’t care what anyone says , clubs are not a place for people in relationships to go to, unless your partner is with you. So whether he did anything or not , he is still disrespecting your relationship, by not giving a fuck about your feelings and only doing what he feels is best for himself. I was in a relationship with a girl that started pulling this same shit on me , going to the clubs with her friends consistently out of the blue , when she never did it before , she started making her toxic friends her priority and that right there is a sign your relationship is not good , you should always be your partners top priority , if you aren’t , than you aren’t in a real relationship , you are just a convenience to them and they no longer care about how you feel , I was in relationships with girls ‘ that pulled this shit and would tell me I was being insecure and I didn’t trust them it has nothing to do with trust , it comes down to respect for each other, so do yourself a favor and kick him to the curb where he belongs , i use to work as a bouncer at a club and the shit I witnessed there was all I needed to see. So my advice to you is move on from him and realize you deserve better than that. Again, I don’t care what anyone says clubs are not a place to go to without your partner period. Clubs are for single people looking to hook up and mingle , A cheater will say they go there for the music and the drinks and they like to dance and that cracks me up, because it is the biggest bullshit excuse what so ever. If you like to drink wouldn’t you just buy your own alcohol and drink at home with your friends where you are safer and it’s cheaper? Ok so you like to dance? So you like to dance by yourself or you like to dance with your friends? Wouldn’t
You rather dance with your partner instead? So tell me what other Reason would a partner want to go to a Club consistently without you? One
Thing I learned in relationships is don’t fall for this bullshit, kick him to the curb , he clearly doesn’t value you or love you , a real man would not put himself in those environments without his partner out of clear respect for her because he expects the same from her in return. So find yourself someone that wears your shoes the same way they should be wearing yours , if not you are only hurting yourself , A loving partner doesn’t write Sucker on your forehead , remember these words

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

No, my wife would be furious and probably divorce me. I would the same for her. You can say nightclubs are for dancing and drinking, but people conveniently leave out that the main purpose of going to a club is to be social with strangers and have fun, which almost always goes in a sexual direction. If you go you go knowing you are probably going to get laid or at least grind on/make out with someone.

A bar on the other hand, entirely different. Knock yourself out.

IslaTheWitch · Accepted Answer

I prefer to have some time for myself in a relationship. I think it's essential to align with each other and not overlook the time when your partner might need you.

Currently, both of you have an ideal situation to catch your breath. From my perspective, he simply takes advantage of it. He enjoys his life when you're not there, allowing him to focus on you when you return. Wouldn't you prefer him to thrive rather than wither without you?

Focus on your family and recharge your batteries. It's healthy to miss each other and take breaks from one another from time to time.

Also, consider that you are different, and you will feel and react differently to various situations.

wiltingrosepetal · Accepted Answer

The idea is fine, but you should communicate some boundaries when clubbing. Don't flirt with other people, don't get black out drunk, etc. there's nothing wrong with the distrust around a club scene- especially if they're a lightweight- as long as you communicate through it

lightbulb27 · Answer

sounds like an immature brat. no. he needs to wake up and grow up. Some guys are just stupid, some have idiot friends.

There's a reason why "golf" exists and other sports. tell him to get a life... he has a girlfriend... or he's going to lose one.

molonski2 · Answer

OMG , you just described exactly what I used to do hahaha , and yeah , I really enjoyed breaks like that. I think its harmless , he has a right to enjoy himself surely.

Anemone978 · Answer

I'm not sure about this.. because my sister used to do this all the time because she loved dancing but her boyfriend/husband didn't like it so she would go with her friends and his one bestfriend and his girlfriend.. She never cheated on him and he trusted her.
But when you think of it most people are up to no good, so it is just how loyal your partner is and if you trust them, but if it is too soon to know then it is questionable behaviour.

Miristheiss · Answer

Not in my life.

That is single behavior. That is shady. I would not commit. If my girl dressed up in some skimpy, tight dress, went to the club, drinking, talking to guys all night then she is single. I am done with her. Do not ever contact me again.

Bossbuddy1969 · Answer

If you're in a relationship I don't think you should. Because that leaves you open to being hit on or the temptation of hitting on somebody yourself.

You have to remember that the most important rule of life is most important role in relationships treat the other person as you would want to be treated. And in a relationship what you wouldn't want your partner to do or not though make it the same for yourself if you wouldn't want your partner in a certain situation make it the same for yourself

Ms_Facesitter · Answer

It could be okay, but let him know that you go and don't flirt with anyone or welcome flirts. Don't get drunk. Get home safely, and on time. But a lot of things can happen at a party so to honor all those rules every time you go out to a club? It'd be better to just stay home with your man. I would be worried if he went out somewhere alone when it's late.

worldscolide · Answer

Its not okay for either gender to do that in a committed relationship. you're absolutely right to be jealous.. His behavior is an indicator that he doesn't take your relationship seriously and that he is not mature enough to be in an adult relationship.. to quote a friend of mine "when we pair bond, we put away childish things" Going clubbing and partying are definitely childish things.

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

Hey my friend, this is a huge red flag, tell him how you feel about this with him and maybe take sometime off from seeing or communicating with each other. I wish you the best of luck !!!

desperatelyhungry · Answer

I think the clubbing stuff is just asking for trouble. Me personally I woukd only want my partner to go if I was with him, and I would only go if he was with me. However Idgaf about clubbing so I don’t have that issue lol

JacobJordan · Answer

no one should be going to clubs period. but in a relationship infinitely worse

Anonymous · Answer

If you lack that much trust, your relationship is doomed anyway.

Filthy_Immigrant · Answer

obviously. people go to clubs to "have a good time with their friends"

Drumlin2001 · Answer

If you trust him it shouldn't be an issue. If you don't trust him, you have a bigger problem than him enjoying a night out

boggboss · Answer

Are u upset that he is having fun or doing u think he is doing somthing shadey

Fromdusktilldawn · Answer

for many guys who enter a relationship, they have much less contact with their male friends because they focus so hard on the girl. As soon as she is away for some time its time to see the guys again.

KrakenAttackin · Answer

NO! Going to clubs (without your SO) when in a relationship is unacceptable.

Peter_Penetrator · Answer

A woman should never go to the club alone. Many things can go wrong for her.

Sasha0426 · Answer

Stuff like that is for single people. If he wants to act single, make him single. He won’t care 🤷‍♀️

ThrillSeeker01 · Answer

Does he text you all the time? He should if he likes you.

Raaj4you · Answer

No, it's not if you are going with your girl friends.

Is it ok to go clubs alone while in a relationship?

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What Girls & Guys Said

Hey my friend, this is a huge red flag, tell him how you feel about this with him and maybe take sometime off from seeing or communicating with each other. I wish you the best of luck !!!