How to deal with people talking negatively of you?

[animalwithin]

I approached a girl at the place I ride horses at. It was a bad approach, I did not come across well, and she rejected me. I probably lingered a few seconds too long since her friend then made it a point to reject me again.

It's all but certain she'll talk shit about me to all the other girls that she rides with (it's essentially an all-girl barn and me haha).

This definitely hampers my chances with the other girls there.

How do I deal with this? To all the girls there, I'm going to be that weird guy before I even get a chance to talk to any of them which sucks.

[RickyRage]

Is it only bad because you got rejected?

Rejection is a part of life. You cannot control other people, only your actions or reactions.

I commend you for putting yourself out there. If/when you go back again, tell her you are sorry if you made her feel uncomfortable and leave it at that.

[animalwithin]

It's bad because the whole approach was bad and I should have put more thought into it.

The rejection sucks, sure, but what sucks more is that her friend felt it necessary to reinforce the rejection in the moment and that this is sure to spread to the rest of the barn and to all the other girls there. It's like a mistake that keeps on haunting you rather than just getting rejected and then parting ways.

[RebelinSteel]

Moral of the story, never try to hit on people where you work, or a club you are in, unless you are prepared for negative reaction from those at work or the club. It does not hamper it means you don’t do it again.

[animalwithin]

This is what I've always subscribed to and haven't violated this rule for many years.

That said, if you don't approach women at work or school or any other place that you frequent, where do you approach women? I get it, the supermarket, bar, etc. or any other place where you're most likely not going to see them again but you're eliminating a large demographic of women if you don't approach women in places that you frequent.

To your point, you're saying it's effectively over with all the other women there regardless of whether or not she's talking ill of me.