Guy asked me out for coffee and I said yes. Do I wait for him to setup a date/time for it?

[Anonymous]

Guy I’ve been talking to on a dating app asked me if I wanted to meet over coffee and I said “yea I’d like that”. I didn’t ask to setup a time because I thought he will plan it out. Do I ask him what date/time he has in mind or just leave it on him to plan it out? I’m nervous and don’t want to seem too eager.

[Drew-1990]

If he asked you out then he should be planning it. He should have scheduled a time the moment you agreed. If he needed to look through is schedule or something first he should have informed you of that he shouldn't leave you hanging. It be one thing if you asked him if he wanted to get coffee but since he initiated it, He should plan it

[Asker]

Thank you for sharing your opinion, he just asked and planned a date/time

[Drew-1990]

Ok good I'm glad he did. Online dating sucks honestly so I'm glad it's working out for someone, hopefully

[Asker]

Honestly, I believe in face to face interactions more! I’m trying online dating for the first time and keeping my fingers crossed! It’s really hard to find the right partner these days. Hope things work out for you too!

[Drew-1990]

Thanks you, enjoy your coffee date

[Asker]

Hey! So he actually suggested coffee followed by a walk for Thursday. He picked a garden for walk and asked if I’ve been there before. To that I told him I haven’t and I’m up for it. He hasn’t yet come up with a full plan like which place to meet and say what time. Should I ask him about the time and place for meeting?
To be honest, I was expecting that he will find a coffee place near the garden and tell me about it and also ask me what time will be suitable for me for meeting. Do I ask him about meeting time and place?

The day after he asked me out for coffee, I messaged him around 9pm and asked how his day was and he replied to me around 2am so the next day I didn’t even bother to reply to him. I think he figured that I didn’t appreciate that late reply so since then he tries to message few times a day just to check in on how it’s going. He also goes to play sports after work and I’m surprised why he hasn’t finalized time/place for coffee. Makes me think it’s not that important for him.
I would really like to know your thoughts on this.

[Drew-1990]

That is a little strange he hasn't told you a place and time. Maybe he doesn't know a time yet and he will say something today about that. Honestly I would have told you where or when right away and if I wasn't sure about a time I would just admit that and tell you I'll pick a time like the day before and at least give you a time line I would expect. But it's Wednesday today so if you want too you can ask him at this point you have given him enough time, I don't see it as pushy. And honestly i can see how it feels like it's not as important to him but maybe give him one more shot. Sounds like he figured out too that he screwed up not messaging you that night but at least he is putting in the effort now to message you and make sure he doesn't do that again.

[Asker]

I agree with you. He should have finalized time and place the day or at least the day after he asked me out. I guess it takes all kinds of people to make this world.
He messaged just now and mentioned it’s rainy day tomorrow. I thought he was indirectly asking to move the meeting so I suggested that may be we can move to another better day. He then replied that he and I could something indoors like bowling or mini golf.
I’ll probably go with that approach but first suggest we do some sit down so we can talk.
I am not a fan of slow and unclear conversations but I will give him more chance (as you also suggested) to see how it goes and the kind of person he is. Thank you again!

[Drew-1990]

Your welcome I wish you luck I hope he ends up being good for you. Dating sucks and is hard especially online, I have zero luck on it.

[Asker]

Aww thanks! I wish you all the luck too! I haven’t dated in a while and trying online dating for the first time so really have no high hopes lol
I followed you so it’s easy to ask for your suggestions. Hope that’s ok.

[Drew-1990]

That is ok normally I would be flattered but I'm actually planning on quitting GAG soon in a couple days

[Asker]

Thanks. Sorry to hear you might leave gag soon!

[Anonymous]

It's perfectly fine to wait for him to follow up and suggest a date and time for the coffee meetup since he initiated the invitation. If you're eager to meet up sooner, you can also express your availability and suggest a few potential times to make planning easier. Communication is key to setting up a successful date, so feel free to reach out if you haven't heard from him after a reasonable amount of time.

[DannyUk2017]

If you BOTH are gonna wait for each other's answer, i'm afraid that ☕️ will go 🥶...😅so either one, if not Both need to "push through".

[Asker]

Haha, thanks! He did set up a date/time for the coffee :) so now it’s all about wait and see how it goes

[DannyUk2017]

Good luck then, just please don't forget that if you like the date, make sure you make "steps" towards it too, otherwise he might think that you only wanted to go out for ☕️, and nothing futher than that! 😉👍

[Asker]

Hey thanks for suggesting me that. I was wondering the same. I have heard that a woman should wait for the man to get back within 2 days of the coffee date to know if he is interested to meet further. Do you think that’s true?

[DannyUk2017]

That is NOT true, because if you Both (cave in) none of you will have the CHANCE to Know each other! He will think that You are NOT interested, You will Think that YOU ARE NOT HIS TYPE, and all the "coffee meeting" and the chance to really KNOW EACH OTHER will be LOST!

[Asker]

I’ll keep that in mind to take this forward if the coffee date goes well. Thank you! :)

[DannyUk2017]

Very Welcome and Goodluck!

[Asker]

Thank you for your kind wishes!

[Asker]

He actually suggested coffee followed by a walk for Thursday. He picked a garden for walk and asked if I’ve been there before. To that I told him I haven’t and I’m up for it. He hasn’t yet come up with a full plan like which place to meet and say what time. Should I ask him about the time and place for meeting?
To be honest, I was expecting that he will find a coffee place near the garden and tell me about it and also ask me what time will be suitable for me for meeting. Do I ask him about meeting time and place?

The day after he asked me out for coffee, I messaged him around 9pm and asked how his day was and he replied to me around 2am so the next day I didn’t even bother to reply to him. I think he figured that I didn’t appreciate that late reply so since then he tries to message few times a day just to check in on how it’s going. He also goes to play sports after work and I’m surprised why he hasn’t finalized time/place for coffee. Makes me think it’s not that important for him.
I would really like to know your thoughts on this.

[DannyUk2017]

Maybe he is thinking of a place around that garden, i can`t say what`s on his mind, but if the date approaches, sounds like he is in limbo, now you need to wait for that date, don`t pressure that, if he doesn`t answer you within 2/3days then maybe he might just lost interest, or it could that he is not financial stable at the moment, matbe also he wants to actually take you to dinner instead of coffee, just give him a bit of time, and if he doesn``t give you any sign, that will start to look like a red flag there, but we will see..

[Asker]

Thank you! I’m very sure of one thing that I won’t ignore any red flags and will drop him like a hot brick if it reaches that point. As a benefit of doubt, I’ll just ask him about time and place for tomorrow coffee if he doesn’t say so by afternoon. Let’s see how it goes.

[DannyUk2017]

I love the way you think, i know sometimes we need a "push" and that the women need to take the reins, but that normally happens when you both teens, and don't know what to do next, with the age normally comes The Experience, Good Luck

[Asker]

Thank you! He just got back to me and mentioned about bad weather tomorrow so I told him we can move the plan to another day and he immediately replied that he and I could do some indoor stuff like bowling. So I think he and I will meet tomorrow.
This is why I’m a fan of a world without online dating apps and texts lol

[DannyUk2017]

That's Good! Good Luck & Have Fun 👌

[Asker]

Thank you! I send good wishes your way!

[DannyUk2017]

Very Welcome, My pleasure.

[WhitneySnow]

Leave it to him. He asked you out.

[Asker]

Thanks, he just asked and planned a date/time

[WhitneySnow]

Great!

[Asker]

Thank you! :) I haven’t dated in a long time and I’m really nervous about how I will show up for it lol

[WhitneySnow]

You’ll do great 😊

Gtg. Night!

[Asker]

Thanks! Good night to you too :)

[Asker]

Hey, I would like to have your (girls) perspective here.

He actually suggested coffee followed by a walk for Thursday. He picked a garden for walk and asked if I’ve been there before. To that I told him I haven’t and I’m up for it. He hasn’t yet come up with a full plan like which place to meet and say what time. Should I ask him about the time and place for meeting?
To be honest, I was expecting that he will find a coffee place near the garden and tell me about it and also ask me what time will be suitable for me for meeting. Do I ask him about meeting time and place?

The day after he asked me out for coffee, I messaged him around 9pm and asked how his day was and he replied to me around 2am so the next day I didn’t even bother to reply to him. I think he figured that I didn’t appreciate that late reply so since then he tries to message few times a day just to check in on how it’s going. He also goes to play sports after work and I’m surprised why he hasn’t finalized time/place for coffee. Makes me think it’s not that important for him.
I would really like to know your thoughts on this.

[WhitneySnow]

I think you should ask him about the time and place. Guys can be careless about those kinds of details.

[Asker]

Thank you! He has started the conversation a while back about tomorrow meeting so hopefully things will go at better pace now. by the way I totally agree with some guys being lost or confused or careless a good few times lol

[WhitneySnow]

Great! Good luck

[Asker]

Thank you!

[riverrat3]

Should have asked when when you said yes

[Asker]

Actually we were talking about two things when he asked for coffee and he may have mistook my response to be for the other thing we were talking about so I made it clear that I said yes for coffee and he immediately planned it out. So let’s see how it goes. I don’t have high hopes coz I met him recently on a dating app. Anyways let’s see what happens.

[riverrat3]

Good luck

[Asker]

Thank you!