Looked at boyfriends phone, am I over reacting?

[Anonymous]

Last summer I found my boyfriend texting some girl from his area on Instagram, I was also pregnant at the time. When I confronted him about it he told me that was hid friend texting her off his Instagram and that he doesn't even no who the girl was. So I believed him. Fast forward to yesterday my boyfriends Facebook was still signed in on his old phone so I ended up having a look ( I know I shouldn't have) but it turns out he does no that girl and he was actually texting her back in December 2022, me and him met November 2022. My boyfriend was sending her selfies to his friend saying he was texting her. I feel really hurt and lied too , now I'm worried he was actually texting her last summer and it wasn't his friend. I also seen he was sending random girls messages on Facebook while iv been with him when he was drunk. He also said to a friend "you should meet my girlfriend before she gets fat" talking about when I was pregnant. I feel so hurt I dunno if I'm being silly or over the top. The way he was talking about me in some messages just felt like I wasn't important to him. He was writing to girls saying " wow your beautiful " wtc he said to a friend he didn't even want any more kids, while i was pregnant but me and him were trying? So that hurt me. Any advice?

[Fireguy17]

Ahhh the old his friend did it excuse.
Sadly, I do not see much of a future together with him.
He seems to be paying more attention to other women than making plans for his family.
In all of my years I have never given my phone to someone else to text another girl.
They can use their own phone and just delete the message.
I have let a buddy call or text someone, their wife or SO when they forgot their phone, but not to have long conversations with them on my phone.
No it is time to kick him to the curb.
The situation just sucks for you.
Sorry you are going through this.

[Summeroflove]

Being lied to sucks and it seems like trust has been broken. Sure there are personal things I understand keeping private. But him lying to you and hiding things does seem suspicious. I think you should confront him on it

[fantasticass]

You already know the answer to your question... unfortunately you do not like the answer. Leave him. He's toxic. He has verbally abused you, what's next? you deserve someone better, not a selfish prick.

[didichi]

You’re not overreacting, I’m glad you looked through his phone because if you didn’t, you wouldn’t know that he was playing you. I’m sorry girl but dump him, you don’t deserve that at all.

[Account]

Υout boyfriend sounds like a piece of shit and in my opinion he needs to be dumped.

[boggboss]

U believed a lier when he lied to your face and now have caught him in more lies and are asking if u are overreacting?

[Asker]

Pretty much yes

[boggboss]

He is crealy upto no hood and has lied about things he never needed to in the first place u need to work put if u can stay with a cheater

[Anonymous]

I pray this is a troll story and you didn't bring a child into the world with a) him as the father and b) you being someone who undoubtedly missed a ton of red flags but let him get you pregnant anyway. It's difficult to read all the short-hand and mistaken words when I go through this.

[Asker]

No this is 100% real. I'm anonymous incase anyone knows me. But yep this is a true story. I'm just looking for advice not to be told I'm stupid

[Opinion Owner]

Wow, that's disheartening. I was really hoping it was fabricated. He said he doesn't want any MORE kids. How many does he have? Are they all with you?

[Asker]

He has 3 kids from him past relationship. 😔

[Opinion Owner]

I don't have anything encouraging to say about him, but I wish you good fortune. I hope you can afford to raise a child on your own because I wouldn't count on him for much. Maybe he'll surprise you.

[spartan55]

@asker best advice is go no contact and lose the loser.

[Opinion Owner]

@spartan55 She probably has to wait and see if they'll be any financial support?

[WhitneySnow]

That’s really troubling. Maybe you and him are at different stages of maturity in terms of what you want out of a relationship. Which is awkward when you guys have a kid together.

[TommyMountainFigure]

No you aren't reacting...

Stick the phone in his face and say 'care to explain this?'

Sit back and listen to his reaction.. From there you have to handle things as you see fit!

[TommyMountainFigure]

Aren't over reacting * I meant!

[Nikki1989]

Phones are the tool of the cheater. Anyone that is always on his phone is a huge red flag that can't be ignored.

[electromagnetic]

Girl, you’re being played. I wouldn’t call it overrating. If anything, I need you to act some more because it’s not enough.

[jahaims]

He obviously has zero respect for you. You are letting yourself get used

[LiamJHayden]

If one finds it necessary to try to look through the SO's phone, might as well end it because the trust in not there.

[Trekfan68]

This guy just isn’t worth it. It’s time to move on.

[Anonymous]

You need to work harder at keeping your baby daddy's attention.

[jahaims]

That is an immature outlook. He is low quality and a waste of time. Why would she waste time on someone who is immature

[Opinion Owner]

@jahaims She already let him fill her womb with his seed.

[MsProsperity]

Sadly you’re still calling him your boyfriend

[SotiCoto]

Talk to him about it, not to us.

[Asker]

Then why are you even on this site?

[laly520]

u aren't overreacting

he is a jerk

[Whitedog1]

Time to move on permanently!

[Fuentes]

Dump him I would never treat you like that

[jjj101010]

What was the nature of the messages

[whistlingwh0res]

A lot of men are just a “thief”