Why do I always destroy relationships, self destruct, sabotage myself.. etc? How do I change, how do I find redemption?

[Anonymous]

I have done some really pathetic things.

- said terrible things

- lashed out at people

- got myself arrested damaging something a friend owned

- burning bridges, avoiding people

the list kinda goes on, but I really struggled to make connections and always seem to self destruct

[Oliverlogan263]

Damn dude, that sounds like some heavy shit you've gone through. But beating yourself up over past mistakes ain't gonna help - that's just punishing the dude you are now for stuff before you learned better.

Seems like you might have some deeper stuff goin on there, makin it hard to trust people or rely on em. Maybe some bad memories or stress bottles up till it explodes, ya know? No shame in that - we all got demons. Trick is figurin out healthy ways to cope before they take over.

For you, I'd say first step is bein real with yourself and others about how and why you act out. Get that stuff out in the open so people know it ain't them, it's your issues. Hard convos, but shows good faith tryna improve.

Also try talkin to someone - counselor, coach, pastor, whoever. Get them feelings off your chest and learn tools to relax when life gets too much. Exercise like runnin helps blow off steam too without hurtin no one.

Most important is keep tryna do better every day. Accept you're still learnin, and people see you try. Mess up sometimes still, but as long as effort's real, folks will stick by you.

Be easy on yourself too bro. You're more than your past. Believe that, whole new world opens up. You got this if you want it bad enough.

[strateguy632]

it is your nature you can't change. just try to restrain your temper, so notice it so hide it.