What’s wrong with me? Why can’t I be normal? How can I stop attracting Black men? Is it possible I’ll find love?

[Anonymous]

I am an 18-year-old Black girl. I have not engaged in smoking, drinking, or sexual activity, and have only had two boyfriends in the past. At times, I feel like I am missing out on certain life experiences. My daily routine mainly consists of work, and I often struggle with feelings of unattractiveness.

In my previous relationship, my ex-partner was primarily interested in physical intimacy rather than developing a meaningful connection. This has been a source of disappointment for me. Additionally, I find it upsetting that I tend to attract Black men, as I perceive them to be rude, violent, and lacking respect for women. It upsets I attract black guys. I have found a few men of difference races find me attractive, and preference is non black guys.

What I am doing wrong?

[prettygurlrock]

As a 24 year old black woman, I would like to say a few things, you’re 18 for one so you are barely into dating the scene neither have you been a very serious relationship.

As a 24 year old, at the age of 18 your life is LITERALLY just getting started. At that age you are discovering who are you and what you want to be. One thing you should work on is loving yourself before you try to date!

Last thing, I’m sorry that you experiencing boys but not every black man is not like that. I have the most amazing black man in my life who will give me world and shirt off his back literally! You don’t have to go on here and try to downplay black man because you have experience shitty ones.

If you’re not attracted to black man girl it’s okay but for you to be a black girl yourself talking down about your own races like other races are just perfect is crazy work.

Love your self first boo then maybe you can love someone else. Literally sending you love because you deserve it.

[Oliverlogan263]

Sis, don't be so hard on yourself! There's nothing wrong with you for wanting to take things slow and wait for the right connection. Your values of wanting an emotional bond over just physical stuff are really mature and will serve you well finding a good dude someday.

As for the types of guys you attract, try not to make generalizations about whole races. Every person is an individual. Maybe put yourself out there trying new social clubs or Meetup groups focused on your interests, so you can meet more like-minded people regardless of background. Don't limit yourself before even giving someone a chance.

Comparing yourself to others on social media is never accurate either. Everyone has insecurities, so try boosting your confidence by focusing on your good qualities and staying active doing things you love. You're still young - don't feel you have to have it all figured out already! Have faith the right guy will come along who truly appreciates you for who you are inside. Keep your head up sis!

[normalice]

I don't really know but of the ~20 or so women who have asked me what they are doing wrong (of all races), 100% of them were overweight. And they were frustrated because no one seemed to want to tell them so, but everyone holding their tongue was also frustrated because the answer was so extremely obvious that there was no way they didn't already know - and so they must have been asking not to be told the answer but to be told they could have some answer besides the correct one. And that's just not an indulgence people are willing to help maintain.

[Asker]

I’m not fat by the way I wear a size meduim

[normalice]

Cool. I don't know what that means, though 😅

[Asker]

I thought you meant being fat was the issue

[normalice]

I mean I don't know what a size medium is.

[HaleyWalker]

You do realize even when your stuff is anonymous we can see your age range 24 to 29. 💀 tragic

[Asker]

I’m actually 18 and yes I know you can see age range

[HaleyWalker]

🤨 ok

[Anonymous]

With you being so young. There is no rush to settle down into a solid relationship. Every good relationship starts off as dating which add up to a relationship. There are some white guys that are interested in black girl. But pay attention not all black guys are bad. Maybe the few you have dated.

[shortster]

It is hard to say when we know very little about yourself. However, most people tend to attract their own race more than other ones.

[Anonymous]

You just said some non black guys find you attractive so your question doesn't make sense.

[Asker]

It’s hard finding non black guys

[Opinion Owner]

Go online

[Asker]

I did but they seem like want girls more of their race

[Opinion Owner]

Did they tell you that? What gave you that impression?

[Asker]

They didn’t tell me that and when I tried to talk to one he had already had a girlfriend

[Opinion Owner]

That's fowel... which app did you use?

[Asker]

Yubo

[Asker]

But next time I’m going to use real dating apps

[Opinion Owner]

Try bumble

[Asker]

Thanks I will do

[Cindy911]

Do you recommend bumble

[Cindy911]

Have you been lucky on that one

[Asker]

@Cindy911 I haven’t tried it yet

[Cindy911]

Did you have good success with bumble